Karen Zerby
A Spirit Trip
By Maria 3576 10/05
GN 1156 FD/MM/FM / FEAST 2006
This Letter is to be read privately during Family Feast 2006.
Dearest Family,
1. The Lord has promised, "Eye has not seen, nor ear heard‚ neither has it entered into the heart of man, the things which God has prepared for them that love Him" (1Cor.2:9). So we know that He has some very wonderful things in store for us—beyond our imagination, dreams, or what we expect.
2. I'm going to share with you a spirit trip the Lord gave to one of our channels, where they watched as one of the Lord's faithful servants came Home to be with Him.
3. I know this will be encouraging for those of you who have had loved ones pass on recently‚ and I pray that for all of you it will be encouraging to remember that regardless of how hard the trials and difficulties of Earth and the sacrifices you must make in your service to Him may be, He has a reward that will make it worth it all. He said one time, "When I pay you back to the point where you don't feel that you've made a sacrifice, that's where it has only reached one percent of your reward. My promise is to repay a hundredfold, so there's much, much, much more yet to come! I love to spoil My brides, those who give Me everything" (ML #3379:218).
4. So while our human Earth languages and the limitations of words don't really do justice to such an event as receiving your heavenly reward, and there are many things the Lord can't reveal right now, here is a little peek that He has provided for our encouragement. He said recently that we should think more about our crowns of life, our reward that is coming, and that it would help to motivate us and give us the grace we'll need for the battles and work to come.
5. Remember‚ each reward is different—tailored to the individual receiving it. Your Husband knows you better than anyone else ever could—after all, He created you—and He's going to design, prepare, and give you what will mean the most to you personally. You can count on it!
With love in our Lover,
Mama
6. (Vision: ) I see a lone candle burning. The room is dark, and all that stands before me is a pillar with this candle upon it. The candle is about four inches wide. It has obviously been burning for some time, for it is well-nigh spent; the wick has burned low and is almost gone.
7. To the left there is a window, draped with white silk curtains, light and filmy. To the right two people are standing watching the flame. One is Jesus. The look on His face is worth a million depictions of Him. Such love I see in His eyes as He looks fondly at this candle. His expression is a mixture of pride and love. He's so proud of this candle for burning for Him.
8. At His side is a lovely woman. Her hair is so blonde, it's almost white. Her dress is light and flowing and falls loosely across her shoulders and has long flowing sleeves. She is leaning her head on Jesus' shoulder. I get the feeling that this is a spirit helper or a guardian angel.
9. As the flame of the candle burns lower and lower, Jesus reaches down lovingly and places His hand around the flame of the candle. He withdraws His hand, and within His hand is the flame that once burned in the candle. The scene fades, the room grows black.
10. A life of service on this Earth has ended. Jesus was there to catch this faithful flame and see to it that although its wick and wax were spent, the flame did not falter. It burned stronger than ever in Jesus' hand.
11. As a channel I am now transported to view this scene through the eyes of the one who has departed from this Earth. All that transpires below is described as experienced through his eyes.
(Scene opens:)
12. I feel gentle raindrops awaken me. It is dark all around me, dark and quiet. It feels like dawn or just before, very early in the morning. I feel as though I'm lying on the grass after a storm. The sun begins to rise and I find myself alone in this quiet place.
13. I become aware of someone standing next to me, to my right. I cannot see their form; all I see is a light. A bright yet soothing presence has joined me in this garden. I feel warmth and joy extending from this light which reaches out to me. As I take the brightly shining hand that is extended to me, I am raised to my feet.
14. Suddenly a thunderous explosion of magnificent music shatters the silence! It is so loud that I jump in surprise, but the hand holds me steady.
15. In front of me I see the fabric of this garden scene begin to tear, and light breaks through. It's almost as though it's a picture being torn from the center out. Light streams in and embraces me. The music is so sweeping and majestic and celebratory that I am overwhelmed by a feeling of completion and joy.
16. I look to the being beside me and I now see that it's Jesus. Tears of joy run down His face as He is looking at me. He's so proud of me. Oh, this moment is worth every bit of pain and suffering; in fact, I can think of nothing that wasn't worth it.
17. My life flashes before my eyes, scrolling through my conscience like a film. I see every action ever done, everything that ever mattered to Jesus, everything that ever caused Him joy. There are also moments that make me cringe as I see those things I did selfishly for myself. But Jesus wipes them away and continues on with more that made Him happy.
18. The film ends, its completion leaving this one thought: "Well done, good and faithful servant. Just wait till I show you what I have in store for you!"
19. All the while the music has been so all-encompassing that I feel the rhythm in my body. But now the volume is even increased and I begin to feel it throughout my spirit. And yet it's not the least bit painful to my ears or bothersome. Every cell within me begins to vibrate and sing along joyously‚ creating an incredible sensation of exhilaration.
20. I've been so distracted by this sensation that I didn't notice the scene around me changing. As the feeling subsides somewhat‚ and I am able to focus on my surroundings again, I see that I'm at the end of a long catwalk, so to speak, which leads up to a great throne.
21. I know instantly Who is at the end of this walkway, and I begin to walk toward Him. On either side of the pathway there are friends‚ loved ones, and spirit helpers cheering me on. They're all waving and reaching out to me and shouting in celebration.
22. Tears well up in my eyes and I begin to run forward. Time is suspended and I appear to be running in slow motion. As I pass each face, a picture is projected into my mind of how I know this person. The emotions I experience as each face enters my view are so diverse and intense that I cannot describe the plethora of feelings that come to me.
23. Some of those I see are those I led to the Lord during my time on Earth, and their gratitude is overwhelming. Another face, my proud father, brings tears to my eyes again. Another face, a joyous friend‚ happy to see me again. This goes on for what seems like an eternity, so many lives touched by my service on Earth.
24. As if this isn't enough reward, I look up and I see Jesus running toward me. His arms are outstretched and on His face is the most joyous expression imaginable. As I am running toward Him, the faces around me fade out of my view. There's nothing else for me at this moment.
25. Running toward me is my Husband, my King, my God, the most precious Person in the universe to me! Oh, how could I think of anything else? I know the crowd is still there, for I can hear their deafening cheers, but none of this matters. All that matters to me is diving into my Husband's embrace.
26. Oh, the joy, the tremendous relief at finally being home. I feel like a raindrop falling into an ocean of sweet and refreshing water. I have been separated from home for so long. I am at last reunited! I am home in the ocean from whence I came, of which I am part, and from which I could never be severed completely.
27. Waves of emotion wash over me as I embrace and kiss my Husband. I feel His pride, and that is more than I can express in words—His supernatural pride in me, and His thankfulness and appreciation for my unworthy service. I drop to my knees before Him at first. But that's not enough; I throw my arms out and lay prostrate before Him.
28. He lifts me into His arms, and says, "I know, I know." We hug for what seems like an eternity, as He is kissing me all over my face, before the crowd of witnesses which has surrounded us. I feel as though my heart will explode with joy. Then Jesus looks up to His Father high above this scene, and whispers, "Thank You, Father, for bringing My beloved back to Me."
29. Holding me at arm's length‚ Jesus looks into my eyes and says:
30. My son, oh, My beloved son!
31. The tears run down His cheeks as He hugs me again before holding me out again.
32. (Jesus: ) My love, there is something I want to do for you.
33. Jesus slowly, eyes fixed upon mine, kneels down before me. How could my Husband kneel before me? I cry out‚ "Oh, Jesus‚ no, no, please. I do not deserve such an honor." His eyes still fixed on mine, He says:
34. (Jesus: ) My dear one, you have lived for Me‚ given your life for Me. You have won many to Me. You have sacrificed for Me. Allow Me this one moment, for I cannot think of a better way to honor you. Accept this gift of My love, for I desperately desire to bestow it upon you.
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35. (Channel prays: ) Jesus, I promised not to question what You were showing, but I want to make sure that I'm getting this right. Please confirm this to me.
36. (Jesus:) Yes, My love, what you have seen is correct. I may not kneel before each of My brides, for each is unique and each reward is likewise unique. But remember how I knelt before My disciples and washed their feet? This is the truth, and it is as you have seen it. [End of channel question]
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37. I look around and I see that all present are kneeling as Jesus is, on one knee, before me. And in a moment I hear a thousand voices shouting within my heart. Their shouts tell of gratitude, love‚ and endearment. But the loudest voice of all is Jesus'! I hear Him proclaiming His love so loudly to me, thanking me for everything I've done for Him.
38. I am overcome by uncontrollable weeping. I fall to my knees before Jesus. Again, kneeling doesn't express my feeling properly. Once more I throw myself to the ground before Him, weeping uncontrollably at such great rewards and honor.
39. I feel so unworthy, and yet for Jesus' sake I receive this great honor and reward. Within my heart is such great pain at not having done more for Him. I feel such sorrow—sorrow like I have never felt in my life. The pain is so intense, for within me is a feeling that all that I did could never have been enough. I held back too much, I didn't give as much as I should have.
40. I am not worthy of this reward, and the tears flow. I feel Jesus lifting me. He is kneeling on both knees now and lifts my head onto His knees. One hand is under my head, and with the other He wipes away my now abundant tears.
41. (Jesus: ) It matters not to Me what you did not do. Think no longer of these things, for all that matters to Me is what you did do, how you loved Me, how you obeyed Me, how you gave honor to My Name by loving others in My Name. Oh, My love, can't you see how happy I am? I am overjoyed with tears of joy! You are home! How I have longed for this moment.
42. Nothing of the past matters now; all that matters is our joy and that you are home. All that matters is that I have you again. Oh‚ My love, so intense is the joy in My heart that I feel I most certainly must sing!
Where once a son so loved by Me, on a mission did go‚
To a far-off place, in a far-off land, My love to bestow.
Within My heart I knew he must go,
I waited for him here, and he was in My heart every moment.
Within Me now there sing oceans of melodies.
Nay, nevermore the beauty of the ocean might compare
To the love within My heart that for you I bare.
43. I am proud of you, My son! Well done, well done, My dear and faithful one. Enter into the joy of your Lord. For now there is a party to be had and a celebration to be thrown!
44. Jesus puts His arm around me and I put mine around Him, and we walk forward.
45. Again I find myself at the beginning of the walkway where I had been before, but this time all is silent. There stand on either side the throngs who only moments ago were shouting so loudly that the very halls of Heaven's glory were shaken! It is a silence so complete that not even a bird would dare whisper a sound. Then Jesus shouts in proclamation:
46. Here stands before you My beloved, My faithful one, who has loved Me.—Whose eyes were dimmed by the confines of the world, yet still he loved Me, still he embraced Me, and still he believed in Me. Often was his torment, and frequent his grief.
47. He has shared in My sorrows, he has partaken of My burdens, he has embraced the pain I suffer for the lost. He has given his life in service to Me, to My Father, Mother, and to all of us, his brethren. He has known what it is to lose that which he loved, and he gladly gave up all that I asked of him so that he might maintain his closeness to our heavenly realm.
48. I would have each of you know of the joy I feel at his return. For though this journey has been long, hard, and trying, within his heart beats such a heart of love that it is a testimony to all creation. I honor you now‚ My dearest son. Come forward and receive your rewards.
49. He has known the sacrifices of My Name, and he has borne bravely the scorn and temptations of Satan. But I tell you now that he with determined face and glorious victory has defeated Satan once and for all, and has snatched his rightful victory from Satan's teeth.
50. He was as a sharp dagger in My hand, thrusting and thrusting yet again, never tiring of the journey. Through his yielded heart he overcame Satan's power over him, and he is forever, blessed forever, come eternity, eternally Mine!
51. I say to you, My love, and to all present here today as My witnesses, you have known the sacrifices of My service, and we will now show you the rewards of the same! Come forth!
52. At the end of this proclamation the hall again breaks into shouts of joy and revelry, each praising Jesus with hands raised, jumping up and down. I myself am driven forward by an uncontrollable desire to be close to my Savior, my eternal Love. I dive through the air because my feet are not swift enough.
53. I land before the throne on my knees, magically situated beneath my Savior's outstretched hands. In His hands He bears a bright‚ shining glow—the glow of the saints. He opens His hands, as one would pour water from their hands; the glow pours out upon me and glistens through my being.
54. Until this moment I had not noticed the difference between my being and those around me. Up till now, although I was radiant and clean, others outshone me with their brilliance. But now the oil of the spirit was poured upon me, and I have been changed. Out of my hands and feet streams the same light that was poured upon me.
55. (Jesus: ) There. Now you have been cleansed of all that was of Earth, and all memories of Heaven have been restored to you.
56. Rushing back to my mind are thoughts and memories of past heavenly experiences, past friends in the heavenly realm. All these things come rushing back into my thoughts like a tidal wave. Now I remember, I remember it all! Without a second thought I lunge forward and wrap my arms around Jesus' legs and begin kissing His feet.
57. He lifts me again and says: "I have more for you!"
58. I try to calm my spirit, but it is not till He touches my shoulder that I am able to focus once again. Next, He reveals another glowing object. This is a ring of light. It's nothing like what I had pictured my crown of life to be. It moves, it is alive. How do I describe it?
59. It's like many rings spinning, with sparkles rotating and orbiting the rings. It's not a solid object, it's not entirely light. The only thing I can compare it to is having the Milky Way in fast motion above my head. Every color imaginable sparkles and flashes through it. Colors I cannot even imagine or describe weave their way through.
60. This is my crown of life! Surely Savior, Husband, and Lover, I do not deserve such a beautiful gift, for I am not worthy. I throw myself before Him again and beg Him to please take this from me, for it is too great for me. Jesus gently lifts my crown and again places it upon my head and says:
61. "You are worthy, for I have deemed you worthy."
62. I again throw myself at His feet. How can I dispute His will? A thousand words of thanks roll effortlessly off my tongue in praise. I cannot help but thank and praise Him forever. With a smile, Jesus picks up my crown at His feet and places it back on my head again. He looks at me patiently and we both laugh‚ our laughter mixed with tears, and with His kisses upon my forehead.
63. As though all of this were not enough, He lifts me to my feet. Raising me‚ He presents me to the throng. It seems they have not ceased shouting this entire time; it is a wonder they're not hoarse. They break out in song, a special song, one that was sung at my creation.
64. This is the song of my being, the song that is all that I am. It expresses all that my heart so longs to express to Jesus. It is a song written only for me, and I alone possess it.
65. (Jesus:) Let Me explain this song. In fact, the word "song" is so erroneous it is practically sacrilegious to call such beauty by such a simple description. A symphony perhaps, a song never!
66. Every cell of My creation vibrates with a beautiful sound. On Earth you may identify something by its look or its touch or its dimensions. Here we identify something by all these things, as well as by the song it gives.
67. So it is that upon their creation, each of My creations has a song, the beautiful song of their existence. Every part of them sings, and together that creates an orchestral performance greater than all the music of Earth combined. Every tone, every touch, every sound making sweet love with those around it‚ culminating in a beautiful symphony—you!
68. Jesus again takes my hands in His.
69. (Jesus:) Come, My love, for there await you many pleasures in Heaven. All that I have is yours. All that I am I give to you freely at any time‚ all the time. I am yours, you are Mine, and all that is within My Kingdom is yours. Let Me start by taking you to your heavenly home.
70. My heart leaps inside me, not at the thought of a possession, but because this is yet another gift carefully crafted especially to satisfy my pleasure. But most of all, it is a gift to me from the One Who loves me more than any other ever could. I cannot wait. Let's go!
71. Jesus turns to the crowd and says: Celebrate My beloved's return, My friends! Enjoy yourselves to the full! We shall be but a moment, and then return to this place to revel with you, and give him a celebration worthy of such a loving, faithful friend.
72. The entire crowd lifts golden glasses to the Lord and shouts, "Amen!"
73. We are off, translated in a moment! But what is this? I am blind! I can only see two feet in front of me. Jesus explains:
74. (Jesus: ) It is a surprise, My friend.
75. Comforted, I am content with this limited vision, which is in an instant lifted, and before me shines the most beautiful building I have ever seen. By my estimation‚ this is the first building I have seen since I came here, but to me it is the most beautiful one in all of Heaven‚ because Jesus made it for me.
76. This is indeed a place "prepared," as Jesus promised when He departed Earth. I look more closely and I cannot contain myself. Look, there is that favorite chair I had to forsake when we moved. And over there, oh‚ can it be? My absolute favorite sports equipment all laid out before me!
77. (Jesus:) The best part about this heavenly life is that none of the pleasures of Heaven ever fade, or grow dull or boring. You can feast upon as many of these pleasures as you like, and they never run out or decay. Another gift of My love to you.
78. I feel as if it will take me a lifetime to enter the doorway to this palace. Each step I take reveals another thing that I loved or enjoyed but had to at times forsake in order to put Jesus first, and with each new treasure I must return to Jesus to thank Him again and again.
79. Then I venture forth again, taking but two steps before seeing something else I loved. Again‚ I run back to Jesus and thank Him again and again. Finally He says:
80. "You know‚ I had better come with you; otherwise you'll never make it to the front door."
81. Laughing, we walk hand in hand toward the house—every step closer to the entrance increasing the excitement in my heart and the overwhelming joy and gratitude I feel toward Him.
82. We have reached the entrance. It is not what I expected, but it's exactly what I wanted. I didn't want a clunky old wooden door; neither did I want a highly polished golden gate. What I wanted was a waterfall to wash over me every time I walked in or out of my house, and that is exactly what I find here.
83. As I enter the waterfall, I, the channel, become separated from this dear one, of whose reward I have been able to partake. The scene fades and the words come to me: "Eye hath not seen, neither hath ear heard, neither hath it entered into the heart of men the things which God hath prepared for them that love Him." (End of vision.)
Art by Tamar