July 31, 2004
(ML #3502, GN 1090)
FD/MM July 2004
(ML #3162:202, 205-207, GN 768)
202. (Jesus speaking: ) My people are starving to know the answers that will break them free from their selfishness, that will loose the shackles of jealousy and possessiveness that have such a strong grip upon them, even stronger because they've seen so many examples of misused freedom. They have rocked and reeled from the blows of the Evil One, who was trying to tear down their faith in My Law of Love. He almost succeeded, but I have the power to overcome him. (End of message from Jesus.)
205. (Mama:) At the risk of getting a little off the subject‚ I want to take a few minutes here to comment on the point in the above message where the Lord explains that the Enemy has been able to gain an even stronger hold of jealousy or possessiveness in the lives of some of you because you have been deeply affected by situations you witnessed or maybe experienced in the past in which the freedom allowed under the Law of Love was misused. I suspect the effect that might have had on you was to cause you to close up in an effort to try to protect yourself or your loved ones from being hurt. Possibly the excesses of the past have made you doubt or even reject the truth of the Law of Love, and you've determined that you'll never let happen to you what you saw happen to others.
206. I believe it's accurate to say that some of you have adopted these negative attitudes about the Law of Love even from what you have just heard happened in earlier years‚ not even having witnessed it or experienced it for yourselves. I think this is especially true of some of you young people. You've probably heard stories or rumors of how things were in the days of our greater sexual freedom, and some of you may be quite offended by it. But you know what? Some of what you heard may be quite exaggerated! And that negative impression you derive as a result can be very strong, to where your whole impression about the Law of Love and our earlier days of more sexual freedom becomes extremely negative‚ which is probably neither completely accurate nor fair. Remember, the Enemy has no qualms about putting as negative a spin as possible on the freedom of the Spirit, especially when it comes to twisting, perverting, and spoiling the beautiful truth of the Law of Love in any way he can.
207. I'm not denying that there were mistakes made in the past. The freedom of the Law of Love was taken to extremes in some cases, but what you must not do is allow the Enemy to kill your faith in the beauty of the Law of Love today and steal away the blessing it can be to your life and the lives of others today, because of the mistakes of the past! If things were mishandled in the past, if people were hurt or left out, or marriages broke up unjustly or unwisely‚ that is not the Lord's fault, nor the fault of the Scriptural truth of the Law of Love. It's the fault of the weaknesses and lack of love of man! We can't deny, reject or simply ignore the truth of the Law of Love because there have been excesses or mistakes in the past. The past is the past. We need to learn from our mistakes, but we must also leave them in the past and go on!
(ML #3205:69-78, GN 808)
69. (Mama:) On the subject of how in most cases it's the Lord's will for you to marry if you have created a child together, some of you young people might be battling right now, thinking, "Hey‚ how come the Lord is coming down so hard on us, when look at all the single moms there are from the first generation? Where are all the fathers of those children? How come those guys can get away with not taking care of their kids?" This might be quite a big question‚ especially for you who are children of single parents, or you young men and women who have brought a child into the world and who aren't too keen on the idea of possibly getting married so you can take care of that child together. I asked one of the channels in our Home to hear from the Lord on this. We really needed the Lord's explanation, and as always, He was faithful to give it.
70. (Jesus speaking:) All the children of David are now under the same guidelines of My Word. They've all heard the clear sound of the trumpet as it was put forth in the Charter and "Go for the Gold!" All are accountable, both those from the first generation and those from the second generation.
71. Yes, it is true that there are single mothers of the first generation, and some of them care for the children of their previous marriage—yet I have accomplished a purpose through these circumstances in their lives. But the situations of most of these FGA mothers are different. In most cases, these mothers did have a husband and a father for their children for many years, and during that time the father did stick by the wife and the kids. In most cases the father spent many years faithfully caring for, supporting, teaching, and raising the kids.
72. The difference is that in most cases, these marriages of the first generation had already given it their best shot. They had obeyed, and they had lived, loved, and worked together for years. They had served Me together as man and wife, together caring for their children, even caring lovingly and cheerfully for what were termed "Jesus babies." And though in some cases of larger families there were yet smaller children to raise, I made exceptions and called them to separate only after I saw their years of faithfulness with their first crop of children. I knew their hearts were right and their intentions were pure, so I opened a door for change. For at that time I had yet a greater plan in their lives.
73. In most cases I led these couples to separate‚ if I knew that their separation would be more fruitful overall than their staying together. In most cases this was My leading in their lives at that time, this was My guidance for that time, under those circumstances‚ at that point in the history of the Family.
74. You must be careful not to compare how I worked in times past with how I work in your lives in the present day. For in years past I found it necessary to lead many of the first generation to separate, and I worked in their lives in this way for many reasons, that I might make of their broken pieces a larger unit—My Family, a more yielded Bride to Me. In that time this was the most effective way to accomplish My purpose. Yet I work differently in the lives of My Family today, and you must not compare the two eras.
75. Those of the older generation didn't always handle each and every situation with as much wisdom as they could have. But this doesn't mean that I was wrong in leading them to separate. My hand led many to separate, and through their brokenness they have drawn closer to Me. You must not see with the eyes of flesh, but see as I see. You must not look at situations that seem to you as less than ideal and think that some terrible thing has happened. But look at these situations as stepping stones that I have placed in the way, circumstances that I allow to bring about a much greater purpose.
76. It's not wise to compare‚ criticize‚ or use the past actions of others to justify your not obeying My leading for today. There's a big difference in the stories of the first generation couples who separated in earlier years‚ and the story of someone who carelessly fathers a child and gives no regard whatsoever to the care of that child. There's a big difference between a couple who has spent years trying to make their marriage work and a couple who doesn't even try at all. There's a big difference in the sense of responsibility of those who separated in times past‚ and those who are not taking responsibility at all in present times.
77. Today, every man must give account of himself regarding the Law of Love and the counsel in "Go for the Gold." Now you are fully accountable, so you cannot look at others who are in different circumstances and excuse yourselves or say, "Oh look, they didn't do it, so I don't have to. They didn't take responsibility, so I don't have to."
78. Each of you will stand before Me alone, and you will give account of your actions, whether you lived in love and concern for the mother and the fatherless child, or whether you lived in selfishness. I clarify My Word so that you know: If you have fathered a child since the time of reading the truth of "Go for the Gold," then you are responsible to seek Me, and in most cases, you are responsible to care for the mother and the child. This counsel is for those of both generations. (End of message from Jesus.)
(ML #3365:200-275‚ GN 963)
200. People in our Family and even Active members have been stumbled, not so much by the concept of the Law of Love or the doctrine, but by the samples they've seen. People have been burned‚ disillusioned, and some have eventually even rejected the doctrine of full freedom in the Law of Love because they feel it's hurtful, it doesn't bear good fruit, and people use it as an occasion to the flesh. This is very sad, because what happens is that the Word, Dad's teachings, the Lord's truth about the Law of Love is what gets blamed for the wrong, whereas it's people who are to blame; it's those who are not really living the Law of Love at all, but who say they are! Then when things go awry and people are hurt, it's the doctrine of the Law of Love that takes the rap! That's not fair. The Lord said:
201. (Jesus speaking: ) People argue against the Law of Love, saying it only bears bad fruit, or that because it bears some bad fruit, it's no good. Because there are many individuals involved in complicated relationships, and there are so many different situations and different levels of dedication, love, and obedience‚ of course there will be a huge variety of "fruits" borne from the implementation of the Law of Love.
202. Where there is perfect love and obedience, there is perfect good fruit—but usually there is a mixture of both good and bad fruit. But even though there are problems and even bad fruit at times, that still shouldn't be blamed on the doctrine. The doctrine is not on trial here; it's the people's implementation of it that must be judged. The question is not whether the doctrine is right. It is. The question is whether the people can be trusted with it.
203. There is no doubt about the validity and truth of the full freedom of the Law of Love. David received the truth from Me, and he was faithful to give it to the Family. Maria and Peter have built on that truth. There is no doubt that the full freedom of the Law of Love is of Me; that is not in question. (End of message from Jesus.)
204. (Mama: ) What this means is that there will be a variety of fruit borne from people's living the freedom of the Law of Love. In some cases it's good, in some cases it's bad‚ and in many cases it's a mixture of good and bad. But the hurt and bad fruit of some people's living the Law of Love shouldn't be blamed on the doctrine itself. The doctrine is sound‚ but it's the implementation by some that is in question.
205. About judging Law of Love relationships: Even in situations or relationships where the fruit is good overall, there will probably be some mistakes, slips‚ or wrong decisions. This happens because life is complicated and people aren't perfect. Even when people are trying to do the right thing, they don't always make it 100%. So you need flexibility when judging the fruit of something, because just because there are some wrong things, boo-boos or hurts, that doesn't cancel out all the good. And if there is more good than bad, or if there is a preponderance of good and some bad, then generally you could consider that it's good fruit. Perfection is not required for a relationship or situation to fall into the "bearing good fruit" category.
206. Besides the problems mentioned earlier, there is also a general contempt for the Law of Love in the Family today. I often get letters lecturing me about how I shouldn't be "pushing" sexual sharing. I receive Bible classes in which some of you are trying to disprove Dad's teachings on this subject. I receive reproofs from those who think we shouldn't be preaching the sexual aspect of the Law of Love, lest we stumble some poor, unsuspecting church person. And there are lots of upset young people who think living the Law of Love does nothing but wreck marriages, so you're taking the stance that you'll have a monogamous relationship, since you feel that's the only thing that will last or work.
207. I readily admit that there are serious problems in how the Law of Love is being lived, especially because people are being hurt and stumbled! And I'm not talking about "good hurt" where you allow yourself voluntarily to be hurt. I'm talking about bad hurt! (See "Living the Lord's Law of Love, Part 2," ML #3202:177-195, GN 805.)
208. It becomes quite puzzling after a while to try to know what to do about these ongoing problems, how to improve them. We've published about everything we can as far as specific guidelines, tips, and rules. We've put various amendments in the Charter regarding the Law of Love. We've tried to educate the Family. But still, these serious problems persist.
209. I finally reached a point where I seriously wondered if we'd have to suspend the sexual freedom of the Law of Love for the whole Family. I mean‚ if these relationships can't be shepherded‚ if the rules can't be enforced, if the Family can't be ruled by love and make good decisions according to the full counsel of the Word, then what can we do? I began to wonder if we hadn't reached the same point the Apostle Paul had when he recommended that the celibate stay that way, or get married if they must, but avoid any other sort of sexual freedom or liberties whatsoever.
210. If the Family couldn't handle the freedom, if you couldn't be trusted, then I wondered if maybe the Lord would take it away. I thought, "Well, if many of the Family continue to disobey, compromise‚ hurt and stumble others, then possibly we need to just do away with the sexual freedom totally, for everyone, so we can get on with our main job of winning the world." We've been getting so many complaints about the Law of Love‚ about how it's causing nothing but harm, that I thought maybe we had reached the point where the Lord could no longer trust us with it. That was a sad thought, but I honestly considered it and pondered it.
211. Peter and I are both personally convinced that the full freedom of the Law of Love as Dad taught us, including the sexual freedom, is the truth, and for those who live it in love it's a wonderful blessing of God. We feel very privileged to know this truth as Dad taught us. But we are also realists and we aren't closed to the idea that if the Family comes to the point where it's obvious that you're not learning to live the Law of Love in the right spirit, if it's consistently causing more harm than good, if it's being misused and causing nothing but hurt, then we will stop it. We could amend the Charter so there would be no sexual contact or sexual activity between any individuals of any age who are not officially married to each other. Then we'd be back to where we were before the revelation Dad received about the Law of Love, and back to where most churches (and certainly most dedicated missionaries) are today.
212. I asked the Lord if it was time for this‚ or what we could do to solve these problems. Here is His reply.
213. (Channel describes a vision: ) I see Jesus and His Father up in Heaven. It's such a sad, sad picture. I can't help but cry. Jesus looks very sorrowful. Oh‚ Jesus, help us! Forgive us, Lord, for making You so sad.
214. The Father is sitting on His throne and Jesus is kneeling before Him with His head down, His arms are stretched up toward Him, as if He is making a plea to His Father. He's interceding on our behalf. Jesus is weeping almost uncontrollably. He's asking His Father‚ "Is there no other way?"
215. God is also weeping. He is very majestic, very kingly, very powerful, but it's almost as if all that hardly matters. He looks very sober, very sad, just like Jesus. God is looking down, and He is slowly shaking His head back and forth, and He's crying.
216. God stands up, looking down at Jesus, shaking His head, extremely sad. His arms are in front of Him‚ and His hands are tied at the wrists with a big thick rope.
217. God reaches down to Jesus‚ and with His tied hands He lifts up His Son, and Jesus embraces Him. It seems they are trying to comfort each other.
218. They're standing there in an embrace, and God says, "Son, You know I desire nothing more than to change this situation, but My hands are tied. Only the Family themselves can untie these cords. Only they can turn this tide that is upon them. The decision is theirs."
219. Now both God and Jesus are standing side by side looking down at this giant 3-D TV screen. God still has His hands tied; Jesus has His arm around His Father's shoulder, as if to comfort Him. They're watching the Family on Earth. They both are still very, very sad; tears are rolling down their cheeks.
220. A huge black cloud is closing in‚ hovering over the screen. God's hands are still tied, and He's holding them out over the screen, the dark cloud hovering above‚ and He says:
221. "My hands are tied. According to the choices of My people will their future be determined. Those who choose to live according to Our Law of Love will reap the blessings; they will grow and progress, and walk on to fulfill their destiny. Those who choose not to obey the truth they have been given, and those who choose to abuse the freedom they have been given, those who make a mockery of the Law of Love, the shadow of troubles and sorrow will cover them. They will not reap My blessings; they will not have the power, but will have to face the consequences. They are accountable, for they have heard the truth.
222. "According to the choices of the people‚ it will be done. I am a righteous God and so I honor the majesty of choice that is given to mankind. My Son, pray for Your brides, that their faith not fail, for the future is in their hands." (End of vision.)
223. (Jesus speaking: ) My heart and the heart of My Father are broken with the sight that we see. You have been given precious riches of truth. This knowledge of the full freedom of the Law of Love is a rare treasure. It has never been entrusted so fully to man‚ and there you are, spitting on it‚ trampling it under foot, throwing it in the trash can and telling everyone who will listen how ugly and useless it is. So foolish! This is a pitiful state of rebellion, pride, and arrogance of those who feel you know better than God! Rather than receive this revelation from David with thankfulness of heart, you take it upon yourselves to lecture and set straight your queen. You have the audacity to try to teach My anointed prophetess about adultery and sin!
224. This hurts Me deeply. It saddens Me more than you can know. I feel rejected and scorned. For this truth of the freedom of the Law of Love represents the beauty of My Kingdom. It is a foreshadowing of Heaven. This is the essence of the freedom of My Spirit.
225. Though some of the children of David deserve to have this freedom revoked, due to your misuse of it, or due to your hateful disrespect and lack of appreciation, I will not stoop to that level. I will not take back My Word, for the truth is the truth. I will not recant, for what has been said is right and Godly and Heavenly. Though you tarnish the truth of My Word and freedom of love with your lust and selfishness, though you mock My truth and spit in My face with your murmurs and the stance you have taken in opposition to My Endtime teaching, I will not be moved to retract. I never will, for I stand by the truth of Heaven, as do your king and queen.
226. You have been taught and guided‚ and the boundaries to safely and lovingly live the totality of My Law of Love have been securely put in place. There is no excuse for continued bad hurt and the sins of pride, selfishness, lust‚ rebellion, and for not making the effort to fight and overcome jealousy. The fault is in your own lack of love, your own lack of fear of Me, which makes you feel you can have the pleasure and freedom on your own terms, in your own way, without acting in love, humility, and prayerfulness.
227. You who hurt and stumble others, who speak in arrogance and pride against this great gift, who vow to "never stoop to partake of such freedom," are those who are wrong, not My Word. It is the epitome of pride and self-righteousness to think that you can instruct God on this, the ways of Heaven. I and My Father are One, and We have bestowed this truth on the children of David with open hearts, expecting and praying for the best. This has been a test, an experiment. Even as your David warned you from the beginning, can you be trusted with this? Will you use it for good or for your own ends? Will you lay down your life to benefit others, or will you take and devour and cause pain?
228. You judge yourselves. How have you fared? What has been the depth of your love? What have been your motivations? How much have you loved others as you love yourself? Have you recognized the value of the treasure of the Law of Love?—Or are you amongst those who have mistaken My jewels for cheap glass and tin, to be tossed out?
229. Whether you realize it or are willing to accept it, the truth of the Law of Love is a key factor in the Endtime. I will let this truth be known‚ and if necessary, I will raise up another ecclesia to live it, to be the earthly sample of that which is to come when I rule and reign. My plan will not be defeated. The choice is yours as to whether you will be the ones who are privileged with that honor‚ or if you will cast off the crown. I will not force you, but neither will I remove your chance of receiving the blessing by recanting on this truth of the Words of David.
230. My Father and I are deeply hurt by the pain We see. If We could change it ourselves in some way, if We could right the wrongs, We would, as would your king and queen. But We must restrain Ourselves; in fact, My Father's hands are tied, because We will honor the majesty of choice.
231. The fruit of living the Law of Love is in your hands. You are the ones who will determine the outcome. I leave the choice with you, and it will be clear whether your actions are in love and sacrifice, or in lust and selfishness.
232. I cannot and I will not recant. This truth of the Law of Love must be given and it must be lived—if not by the children of David, then by someone else. I have no choice but to allow this full freedom of My love to be made known to the world, for this must come to pass, and then will the End come.
233. But you, My children‚ do have a choice. It is you who determine the future and how your lives will be lived. You personally have control of your choices, actions, attitudes and relationships. What you decide, individually and collectively, will change the course of your future‚ for it will prove your worthiness of this precious treasure that has been placed in your care.
234. I weep, I lament. It breaks My heart to see the division, confusion, rebellion, hatred and contempt for My law. What a sad and pitiful state! If it were a different time in world history, maybe I would withdraw this blessing to prevent the hurt and misuse. But there is no time now, for the clock races forward and this testimony and truth will be put forward in the Endtime in fulfillment of My promise.
235. I give My children of David the opportunity to get right with Me. I am merciful and I will have mercy upon those who are loyal and true in spirit. I will not punish the whole because of the sins of the rebellious. My Father and I pray and watch‚ for the future of the Family depends on whether you return to your first love in simplicity‚ humility, and consecration.
236. I will not take this blessing from you at this time. But know that if you choose to not live this truth, but rather to despise it, or if you choose to misuse this truth and use it as an occasion to the flesh, I will raise up others who will take your crown. I say this with great heaviness of heart. This is not My desire, and I find no pleasure in giving this warning. Even now the dark clouds of sorrow hang heavily around My Kingdom.
237. I beg you, My darlings, to reconsider, to search My Word, to ponder these things with open hearts. I implore you to cast off the unfruitful works and ideas of the Evil One. I pled with My Father, but His hands are tied. He is powerless to deliver you from your waywardness unless you seek His forgiveness and repent. He cannot overrule your personal choices; neither can I.
238. We wait in soberness of heart, with tear-stained faces, watching and praying. We want to bless the children of David with great happiness, freedom‚ and unity. We want to use King Peter and Queen Maria and their followers to show the world the ultimate love of Heaven. You are in possession of a great treasure. What will you do with it? (End of message from Jesus)
239. (Mama:) What a sad picture and message. Please, dear Family, take this to heart. Don't let the conviction slip away. Take the time to think, ponder, and search the Word. Read past Letters on the subject. Get educated if you don't understand the Law of Love. Don't just rely on what you think you remember. Study, read, seek the truth. Ask the Lord your questions. Realize that you have a lot to lose!
240. People are constantly blaming the problems in relationships and broken marriages on that naughty, bad Law of Love. They practically curse the Law of Love and insinuate or even say openly that anyone who practices the Law of Love is a fool. It's a raging controversy, and those who oppose the sexual freedom of the Law of Love are very vocal about it. I guess you feel it's your special calling in life to set straight those who actually have open marriages/relationships, or who share sacrificially. You don't associate anything good with the Law of Love.
241. But there is another side to this that I want you to think about: The sexual freedom that you young people enjoy with each other, the singles having sex with each other, the singles living together as boyfriend and girlfriend without committing to marriage, etc., is all a result of the Law of Love. Without the Law of Love, that wouldn't be possible.
242. Before the Law of Love, there was no extensive sharing even between singles. Singles in the Family went without sex before they were married‚ some for years! It was Dad's revelation about the Law of Love that gave us the faith and freedom to have sex outside of marriage. Otherwise, we were bound by the traditions of the law like all the other churches‚ and especially missionaries.
243. One SGA in our Home was shocked that the Law of Love has anything to do with single people's freedom to have sex with each other. Her take was that because you young people have grown up with that freedom all your lives, you don't relate it at all to the Law of Love. This again confirms that all the bad is blamed on the Law of Love, but nothing that you consider good or beautiful or fun is credited to the Law of Love. That seems quite imbalanced and unfair to me.
244. The idea came to me that it would help to consider how different the Family would be today if Dad had never taught us about the full freedom of the Law of Love.
245. Here's Dad to teach us. He who has an ear to hear, let him hear!
246. (Dad speaking:) Some of you seem to think that the Family and everybody in it would be better off if the sexual freedom of the Law of Love were done away with or curbed. Boy‚ oh, boy! Some of you guys really have no idea what you're saying. You wanna know something? The Law of Love is something that's much easier to justify by Scripture than is the concept of not living it! What do you think of that? Jesus Himself said‚ "All the law is fulfilled in this: Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." That's what it comes down to. That's what the Law of Love is.
247. Okay, so some might say that's fine and good, but why does that have to include sex? It doesn't really. You can follow Jesus' teachings to some degree without involving sex. Or, some say‚ even if the sexual part of the Law of Love is "lawful" in God's eyes‚ it isn't "expedient," and it's messing up people's lives and marriages. Well, I grant you, life could be somewhat "simpler" without the sexual freedom the Lord has given us, but if you really think about it, I don't think you'd trade in all the benefits.
248. So, let's take a look at what life would be like in the Family if we didn't have the Law of Love. Well, basically we'd be like most church Christians. We'd abide by the rules they abide by. We'd abstain from all sex outside of marriage. Of course, they don't all necessarily "abide" by their own rules these days; but if they don't, they're in most cases suffering terrible guilt and condemnation because they believe they're sinning against the Lord.
249. In just about every religion, premarital sex of any kind is considered a sin. How would you like to live under those rules? Do you even think it's right that people make a commitment to live together and love each other forever without knowing if they like having sex together? It sure doesn't make much sense. My goodness, no wonder so many marriages don't last! That might seem a very "carnal" viewpoint‚ and you might say that if you really love each other it doesn't matter‚ or you'll find a way. But let me tell you, when you live with someone day after day, night after night for years, sex does matter.
250. Think about all the singles in the Family, all the people who don't have a special someone, and who maybe never will, or not for many years. Should they be condemned to lives of abstinence? Without the Law of Love, they would be. That's what the church teaches! Why do you think so many people are sick and tired of religion, soured on anything churchy or Christian or Jewish or Muslim or whatever? It's because religion and restriction are generally synonymous!
251. There are hardly any outfits in the world that believe both in Jesus and in sinless sex!—Meaning that there are hardly any people in the world, especially religious people, who can enjoy sex without feeling guilty if they're not married! Maybe some of you think that is the ideal, that the world would be more innocent and pure if everyone lived by those mores. Well, in some ways it's true that the world's standard has gone down, and the way society has become more tolerant of less responsible sexual behavior has led to more irresponsibility and more immorality. It's true that people are less considerate and careful in the world at large when it comes to sex. They have less regard for the consequences because there aren't really any consequences for anything, legally speaking.
252. But think about it: If you could choose to either live a religious life where you believed sex before you were married was a sin, or if you could live a "secular" life without God or faith, just to feel you had that freedom to have sex‚ what would you choose? Tough choice, huh?
253. Another sad thing is that even the people who don't consider themselves religious or "churched‚" don't have the freedom to have sex without guilt. They still for the most part feel terrible about it. They feel it separates them from God. They feel they don't even have a chance. Many even leave the church or neglect their faith because of it. There are a few individuals here and there who realize that the Lord loves them no matter what, or even who believe and understand that sex is a gift of God and to be enjoyed, whether you're married or not. But they are few and far between. And even if they believe it, they're hard pressed to find a partner who shares both their faith in the Lord and their faith to do those kinds of things without considering it wrong.
254. The Family without the Law of Love would mean that all you kids would have grown up being taught that sex was a sin, hounded and watched by your parents to make sure you weren't having any, and then entering your post-teenage adult life desperate as hell to find someone to marry so you could have some sex! Meanwhile, you'd be dating here and there, like the System Christian young people, trying to find that someone, and you'd be so frustrated‚ so distractedÂ…. In many cases you'd probably end up leaving your service for the Lord so that you could get some sex, or going ahead and doing it and feeling terribly condemned. It would steal your joy of the Lord and your pleasure in living for Him.
255. If you've grown up with that freedom all your life, as most of you have, you have no idea how restrictive and confining it is to not have it! Not only the freedom to have sex‚ but in many cases even the freedom to be alone with someone of the opposite sex. Or to do something like have a party where you dance with everybody, even other people's boyfriends or girlfriends, husbands or wives, would not be an option. You would either have your boyfriend or girlfriend, and maybe some sex on the sly, or nothing at all; or maybe you'd be going behind someone's back with their boyfriend or girlfriend‚ maybe behind your best friend's back, and feeling horrible about it.
256. Some of you would probably be always on the verge of ruining your friendships, because those kinds of things, in the world at large and especially in any Christian community‚ are just not done. And if they are done, they are not talked about. And if they are talked about, it's big trouble!
257. On to marriages: If there was no Law of Love, you'd be having sex with the same person for the rest of your life once married. Okay, if you love them, admittedly that's not so bad. People have done it for thousands of years. But have they really? I'd venture to say that probably less than half of the couples who have ever married throughout history have been faithful to their spouse and only their spouse for their whole life.
258. It's not just the stuff of movies and novels to have affairs and extracurricular adventures. It's life. God created people to have emotions as well as physical sexual needs, and there are always going to be other people besides your husband or wife who you are going to find yourself in intimate situations with and/or be attracted to. I'm not saying that it's always good or right to follow your impulses, and certainly the Law of Love would not be worth it for the sake of that freedom only.
259. I'm just saying that's what happens everywhere in the world, in the Family or not, and the big difference is that in the Family‚ because of the Law of Love, you actually have the training and knowledge of how to handle it right. Plus, you don't have to face condemnation for the rest of your life over it. I mean‚ really, in many people's minds having an affair outside their marriage is comparable to stealing or even killing someone! That's how condemned they are. That's how convinced they are that it's wrong. Is that right? Is that kind of self-righteous, condemnatory, legalistic, restrictive mindset something you would want the Family to live by?
260. Without the Law of Love our Family Homes would be missing out on a great deal. Your interactions would be sadly lacking. Even the "innocent" giving of frequent hugs‚ putting your arms around each other, holding hands, all of that would be taboo.
261. Without the Law of Love you'd have a lot of single people in the Family, people who really want to serve Jesus and who are willing to give up a lot to do that‚ suffering unnecessarily. You'd have people starved for love, for sex, even for simple tender affection. You'd have people going without, being discouraged, feeling unloved, and in a lot of cases probably marrying the wrong person just because they needed someone to have sex with.—Or leaving the Lord's service because they just couldn't take it. Lord help us!
262. You know, that did happen a bit at the start of the Family. The Lord hadn't yet revealed the Law of Love to us, so we abided by the usual rules of most Christian groups when it came to sex. You didn't have it until you were married, and that was that. People were willing to do it, to make that sacrifice, and the Lord allowed them to be tested in that way. But some just couldn't take it; it was too hard. I think a lot of them would not have lasted that long, or would have become very unhappy and even bitter if things hadn't changed at some point.
263. The Law of Love is one of the cornerstones of our radical beliefs that sets us apart from the church, and there is no way we are going to leave it behind, say it was wrong, or discontinue believing and practicing it! Yes, there are potential problems with the kind of freedom that it allows, and, yes, there are times when we need to clarify things or provide guidelines. That's what that 12-part GN series on the Law of Love was all about. There are a lot of misconceptions about the Law of Love, but if you read through that series with an open heart and mind, I dare say there is not a single one that won't be cleared up. There are problems that result from the Law of Love, but as Mama and I must have said a million times, those problems are not the fault of the Law of Love—they're the fault of people practicing it improperly or neglecting to truly walk in love. They're the fault of people not living the Law of Love.
264. The Law of Love is a beautiful gift of God! It is the means by which we have the freedom to enjoy loving‚ Godly sex, with or without being married, and within and without our marriages. It is the means by which we are able to dedicate our lives to the Lord and serve Him full-time and be able to have loving fellowship, affection, and care, whether or not we ever find a mate to share every part of our lives with. It is the means by which we are able to care for our single parents and meet their needs. It is also a means by which we are able to expose the hypocrisy of the church system—all those people who either say they don't do it and are lying, or who are living in guilt and condemnation, or who are so God–damned self–righteous about their sexual morality that they're practically no earthly good to anyone else.
265. God deliver us from that sickening spirit of self-righteousness! That's really what it is when people go around saying that "the Law of Love is the cause of all the marriage problems in the Family." "Why don't we do away with the Law of Love and have monogamous relationships?" God help us!
266. Then there are some people who think that it's fine to have that sexual freedom for singles, because they "need" it—but not for married people. But where do you draw the line? You can't really draw it too clearly at any point because there will always be a valid reason to stretch it a bit further to cover all the possible needs that arise. There are so many scenarios, especially in a missionary movement as diverse as ours. There are singles who live in a Home where everyone else is married. How would they manage? There are married people who have chosen to stay together for the sake of their children, but who, with the consent of their spouse‚ have agreed they have a need for sexual companionship outside of their marriage.
267. Then there's the bottom line, and that is the fact that the Lord blesses married couples giving and sharing and opening their lives to others, according to His leading and as outlined in the Law of Love Letters. That's the crux of the matter—that the Lord intends for everyone to share and give, as He leads, and though married and deeply in love and committed to each other, God blesses couples giving and sharing with others. You can never lose by giving in love—that's God's law, and it applies to everyone, married or single!
268. There is enough hardship and difficulty in the Family and communal living without us having to ask people to do without sex—which is something that the Lord never said we have to do. Already there are girls in places where there are no guys around, or singles in places with no other singles around, and these people make tremendous sacrifices and sometimes don't know if they're gonna make it. There's only so much we can do, and there are some rules we have to have for now, like not having sex with outsiders. But the least we can do is make allowance to meet these people's needs from within our own ranks! The least we can do is make it as easy as possible for them to get what they need. We owe it to our brothers and sisters who are in need to meet that need—and without the sexual freedom of the Law of Love, that would not be possible.
269. Well, meditate on these things. Ponder. Reflect. Think about your life‚ and think how different it would have been or would be now without the Law of Love. I don't mean think about all the bad stuff and the times you were hurt or hurt someone. I know that's true in many cases; I don't deny it. But I believe if you would think about it in the big picture and scope of life, you'd probably realize that in some of those cases the hurt could have been far worse without the Law of Love; or in some cases the consequences of living without the Law of Love would be so dreadful that the complications or hurts seem far preferable.
270. I know that's a bit of a generalization and it won't apply to every case. Nevertheless‚ the fact is that with or without the Law of Love, people will have sex and they will have it outside of marriage. We're carnal creatures of passion. It's the way God made us. Blame Him! But at least with the Law of Love there are guidelines, there is communication, there are "rules" about it being between consenting parties. Take away the Law of Love and you take away all of that, and it's each man for himself and each woman for herself and there's going to be a lot more hurt, a lot more suffering, a lot more neglect, a lot less unity.
271. If you want to stick around in this Family, learn to embrace the Law of Love and treasure it for the wonder that it is, and thank the Lord for all the problems and heartache it has solved. Or if you can't take it, if you don't believe it, then be my guest and go to the churches, who believe that all sex outside marriage is a sin. There are plenty of people who would agree with you on that score. We're not mainstream, but we're in the right stream, the one that's going the way God wants this Family to go! (End of message from Dad)
272. (Mama: ) I want you young people especially to really think about how things would be for you personally without this freedom. It's not a question of picking out the things you like, the various freedoms you want, and then discarding or condemning all the rest. Open your eyes to the truth that all those fun things you like so much are allowed only because of the truth of the Law of Love as Dad taught us. Without it, you'd be confined to the same religious laws as the majority of church Christians.
273. If you want these freedoms, if you like the life you live, if you enjoy your dating and sexual variety, if you like the fact that you're not condemned if you like someone and do something sexy with that person, then wise up and realize that you have the freedom because of Dad! Quit being hypocrites and complaining about the freedom on one hand, while taking advantage of it with the other!
274. And for those of you who can't accept the full freedom of the Law of Love, who continue to think it's wrong, ungodly‚ immoral and adulterous, you'd better find another place to live and serve the Lord! Go where you can live according to the moral code you have chosen, without being faced with the sexual freedom of the Law of Love‚ because it's not going away!
275. God cannot recant, and neither can I! Peter and I stand by Dad's teachings—they are the truth! Where do you stand?
(ML #3459:69-76, GN 1044)
69. (Mama: ) As much as you want to make your loved ones feel better and help them to get over things and be happy, they also need to know that not everything was wrong about their childhood or the Family's past. Even though they may not have liked it‚ that doesn't mean it was wrong. That's where you need to simply stand strong on your convictions for your work, your faith, your love for the Lord and the Family. Be sorry for the genuine mistakes and times you could have done better, and leave the rest behind.
70. There are situations where maybe you should have been with your kids more, or you could have explained things better, or in 20/20 hindsight, maybe you wouldn't even have done some of the things you did. But that's very natural. There's no one in the world who can look back with 20/20 hindsight and say that they would have done everything the same, because no one is perfect.
71. But at the same time, some of the things they have gripes about are not the problem. Your being a missionary and working for the Lord isn't the problem. Your beliefs and faith in the Lord and your life of discipleship isn't the problem. That might be a big part of what they're unhappy about, but you don't have to apologize for those things. It's the human mistakes, frailties, misjudgments or times of misunderstanding, etc., that you need to apologize for.
72. Even some of the things that were mistakes, or maybe could have been handled better--such as their feeling that they didn't have enough time with you, or the difficult time they went through when you as their parents got separated or remarried, or what have you—while you can be sincerely sorry for the difficulty it caused them, it's nothing to beat yourself up about, or that they are justified in blaming the Family for. Parents all over the world face those same choices, and there's certainly as many, if not more, absent parents, divorces, separations‚ and difficult times in the world as there are in the Family.
73. Many people throughout history have not had as much time with their children and families as they would have liked. Look at many of the famous missionaries and explorers, pastors, evangelists‚ even doctors and scientists, who chose to be away from their families in order to carry on what they felt was their life's work. I know that none of you who separated from your children due to your ministry took it lightly. And while perhaps sometimes it could have been avoided, other times it couldn't have—it was the right decision. That's just one example of what might be one of your children's complaints, and the different ways there are to look at it. We have all made mistakes, and you can sincerely apologize for those mistakes. But don't let the Enemy condemn you or make you feel like you should carry the weight of all your child's problems today because of something that happened in the past.
74. So you need to assess what your former member children or loved ones are saying and get to the core of the issues bothering them. And if you have fallen short, then you should apologize for those things. Pray and ask the Lord what you can do to help bring closure to those areas of your loved ones' lives that are bothering them so that they can put things in the past and move on!
75. Whether or not you think there's anything you can do about it, you need to get the Lord's mind on the things that your bitter loved ones tell you. You can't take all of their bitter tirades onboard or it will sink you! It will only cause you to stumble—because there is no way to rectify all the exaggerated blame and hurt that someone who's bitter will throw in your face. If you try to handle it all or make it all right, all you'll feel is pain, confusion and discomfort as a result, that will discourage you to the point of failure. So take it to the Lord, ask Him how He sees things, and let Him help you sort out which things you should apologize for and try to make right, and which things are simply part of your faith that you need to stand strong on‚ and that you can ask the Lord to help them get over.
76. In most cases, it's the bitterness that the person is carrying that is making them unhappy rather than some event in the past. They can move on if they choose to, and you can and should make it easy for them to do so. But whether they do or not is up to them.
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