KEYWORDS: bishopric, king, bishops

Bloodless Coup, The

David Berg

—("The New Revolution" Part IV)—MO February 18, 1975 NO.329A—LTO

1. SO I SUGGEST WE START THIS LEADERSHIP REVOLUTION WITH A COUP! Let's shake up some of this old bottle leadership and shift'em around a bit where they'll do more good, and make some room at the top for some new bottle leadership‚ Amen?

2. THEY SAY CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME, SO MAYBE THE LEADERSHIP REVOLUTION SHOULD BEGIN WITH THE KING'S OWN COUNCIL! We had to laugh the other day when I had a private council with some of my most intimate and favorite young new-bottle leadership who were so few in number that we called it the "King's Privy Council"—so small we could all meet in the privy (the bathroom!—You stupid American blokes!).

3. OTHER GREAT HIGH AND MIGHTY LOFTY COUNCILS HAD BEEN HELD ELSEWHERE without even our knowledge or notification and were supposedly making monumental earth-shaking decisions without so much as even asking the King's opinion on them, and of which I have yet to be informed after two months' time!

4. SO THE KING AND HIS PRIVY COUNCIL WERE MEETING WITH THE LORD and really hearing from Heaven, Hallelujah!—And some of our latest Letters are the result: "The Round Round Room", "Japanese-South American Dream", "There's a Difference", "Naming the Baby", "The Lit Revolution", "The Disciple Revolution", "The Shake-Up" and now this, "The Bloodless Coup!"—Eight good Letters from the Lord‚ some of them on very surprising new subjects‚ all of which we hope you'll be getting soon.

5. THEY'RE A REVOLUTION WITHIN THE REVOLUTION and are gonna shake you up from the hairs of your head to the tips of your toes, Hallelujah! And for good measure, the Lord threw in a couple more shocking dreams called "Registration" and "Rolled Gold"!—All during the brief time the King and his little Privy Council were meeting together! Praise the Lord!

6. THROUGH THESE THE LORD HAS GIVEN US SOME WHOLE NEW IDEAS ON NEW DIRECTIONS in which we need to move and new changes we need to make as we revolute our RPM's to the rhythm of the tune-up of His Spirit! Hallelujah!—For Jesus! It's a Revolution!—For Jesus! And we gotta keep revolutin' all the time or we'll be left far behind!

7. WE CAN'T LEAN ON MAN'S IDEAS AND WISDOM: WE HAVE TO LEAN ON THE LORD and His leadings, and the King and his dear little Privy Council have sure gotten them this month! You've already received some of these directions from the Lord Himself in some of the Letters listed above, and if you haven't got'em, yet, be sure you do! This very Letter you're reading on "The Bloodless Coup!" is a part of the result, and we trust you'll be putting it into practice, effective immediately.

8. AS WE WARNED YOU ABOVE, WE OURSELVES ARE GONNA HELP YOU START THIS "BLOODLESS COUP" by suggesting a reorganisation of our own top leadership:

9. FIRST OF ALL, AS ALREADY MENTIONED IN PART I, WE SUGGEST YOU ABOLISH THE AMBASSADORS and send them somewhere they're more needed and can do more good and let the Prime Minister read his own Bishops' reports so that you local Colonies will not be tempted to try to bypass the Chain-of-Cooperation by appealing directly to the top except in the most extreme emergency.

10. I'M SURE THE PRIME MINISTER'S MOST WORTHY SECRETARY SHALL NOW BE ABLE TO HANDLE ALL SUCH CORRESPONDENCE directly with the Bishops with the greatest of ease, like the "daring young man on the flying trapeze!" That's one of the risks you run for being billed in the "Big Top!"

11. NEXT, WE SUGGEST THAT THE COUNCIL OF MINISTERS NO LONGER CALL MEETINGS WITHOUT NOTIFICATION nor make major policy decisions without authorisation and concurrence of the King. We suggest that these Royal Ministers instead stick to their own Ministries to which they have been appointed and in which they have been exhorted to minister, and in these Ministries solely, without meddling in other affairs, Colonies or business of the Kingdom which is not under their jurisdiction.

12. THIS MEANS MOTHER AND DEB SHOULD EACH STICK TO THEIR WRITING in their respective places and on their respective subjects of Marriage‚ Motherhood‚ Childcare, Colony Care, Food Ministry, etc. This means that they are not to visit nor meddle in the affairs of any other Colonies.

13. THE REASONS DEB IS SO SICK AGAIN is that she has flagrantly disobeyed me again in gallavanting about holding various meetings and celebrations and interfering in the affairs of other Colonies and worrying herself with responsibilities which are no longer hers instead of sticking strictly to her resting and writing as I commanded her!

14. MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON HER AND SPARE HER LIFE!—But He will not bless this direct disobedience. If you Colonies don't stop allowing her to participate in your activities, I'm going to have to forbid you to open your gates to her at all, and she's going to be banished from any Colony visitation whatsoever, and she may have to consider herself retired in order to stay alive!

15. MAY GOD FORBID THAT WE SHOULD LOSE ANOTHER OF OUR CHILDREN THROUGH DISOBEDIENCE! Maybe this final warning will strike some of the fear of God into her to obey! Isaiah, if you let her have another meeting or visit another Colony, you may lose your job as the Queen's Caretaker! Thanks for your faithful reports and all those beautiful pictures!—God bless you for trying!

16. FAITH, HO AND JOSH ARE ALL PIONEERS AND SHOULD ALL BE HITTING THE ROAD, at least most of the time, for parts unknown to them thus far: Faith, as the Lord seemed to indicate in the "Round Round Room", to Latin America; Ho‚ as we have many times requested, to help pioneer the needy fields such as Africa and those in Asia; and Josh is already in Japan visiting and inspiring, we trust, the Colonies of the Far East. Esther will either have to remain with her children with the aid of an assistant father or travel with her husband by the aid of an assistant mother to take care of them at home. Martha and Imrah will now be free to travel together to help supervise the Colonies wherever necessary.

17. THIS WILL GREATLY REDUCE THE NEED FOR A SO-CALLED FOREIGN MINISTRY and its cocktail-belly–dancer parties for Arabs! You'll now be free to visit the Arabs in their own homes and let them treat you for a change, at least to a cup of coffee, and this may help wake you all up!

18. THIS MAKES AT LEAST TWO COLONIES OF THE LONDON BLOB THAT WE HAVE NOW ELIMINATED, the Ambassadors and the old Foreign Ministry, whose personnel can now be better used elsewhere, preferably to pioneer totally new fields.—I can think of nothing better! I'm sorry, but some people can't take a hint and you simply have to spell it out for them: Do you want the books or don't you? If those Ambassadors want to do their own Bishoprics some good‚ maybe they could go home and start supervising their own fields or pioneering a few new ones!

19. QUEEN BECKY AND KING ARTHUR ARE ALREADY DOING A GREAT JOB as the King's own personal Representatives and Directors of Wild Wind Productions as well as the proud parents of three children, including their new baby‚ King Arthur's Knight. God bless'em!

20. NOW THAT THE BISHOPRIC OF THE BRITISH ISLES HAS BEEN CONSIDERABLY REDUCED IN SIZE BY SOME OF THESE CHANGES, WE SUGGEST THAT IT BE INCORPORATED INTO THE BISHOPRIC OF NORTHERN EUROPE. Both Bishoprics are being vacated by the departures of Ho and Faith, and Zadok has apparently been made International Business Manager by someone, so it might look like the Prime Minister hasn't much left to do but read seven Bishop's reports. Therefore we suggest that the Prime Minister himself take over the Bishopric of Northern Europe in which he is residing and so ably working and which so greatly needs better supervision and help, which he has already begun to give, but to which he can now devote his full time.

21. THIS LEAVES HIS FORMER BISHOPRIC ON SOUTHERN EUROPE VACANT TO WHICH THE KING HAS APPOINTED AS OF NOW THE MOST WORTHY FORMER REGIONAL SHEPHERDS, QUEEN RACHEL AND KING EMANUELE OF ITALY as the new Bishops of Southern Europe. This is no small honour, we assure you, as this great Bishopric under the diligent care of our deal Prime Minister has grown to include as far South as all of Africa and as far East as India, an area stretching some five thousand miles from East to West and even more from North to South and including over 70 countries on three continents containing nearly half the world's population and the full length of the Arab-Moslem wall from Spanish Sahara to the borders of China and from Northern Europe to the South Pole!

22. IF WE'D LET OUR DEAR PRIME MINISTER KEEP THIS SOUTHERN EUROPEAN BISHOPRIC MUCH LONGER, IT MIGHT HAVE SOON INCLUDED YOU AND THE OTHER THREE CONTINENTS AS WELL! Look out, North and South America and Australia, that he does not now try to include you in his new Bishopric of Northern Europe! Russia and China had better fear and tremble as well! God bless him! Jeth is really a hard worker! We now expect to hear even greater things of his accomplishments with his great new Bishopric of Northern Europe!

23. THESE NEW APPOINTMENTS, OF COURSE, THOUGH EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, ARE STILL SUBJECT TO THE FINAL APPROVAL OF THE KING'S COUNCIL OF BISHOPS, which now replaces, by the way, in both power and authority of administration of the worldwide affairs of the Kingdom, the old Council of Royal Ministers who are now scattered about the world in the various individual Ministries to which we hope they will devote their full time and attention and bother themselves no longer with these far-reaching affairs of State which we feel can be handled very well and more directly by the Prime Minister and the King's Council of Bishops.

24. YOU MIGHT CALL IT A "BLOODLESS COUP" to prevent any more usurping of authority by those unauthorised to do so‚ and to strengthen the King's influence on his Kingdom without interference and contradiction of others.—Amen? Hallelujah!

25. I TOLD YOU IT WAS A REVOLUTION WITHIN THE REVOLUTION!—And if you don't believe that a woman as young as Rachel is ready for such great responsibilities‚ just look at the successes of her present Regional regime and marvel!—And you will marvel even more when you hear the soon-to-be-published "Prophecies of the Great Queen" received years ago but now being fulfilled! Don't kid yourself!—According to these prophecies received in a non-stop 36-hour marathon session in the Spirit with the Lord, she and Maria will someday be running the world! I believe it!—And if you knew'em both as well as I do, you'd believe it too!

26. MARIA AND RACHEL ARE TWO OF THE MOST CAPABLE, EFFECTIVE AND UTTERLY LOYAL AND OBEDIENT ADMINISTRATORS THAT I KNOW, who, having been faithful in a few things, the Lord will someday make rulers over many things when I am gone, according to His own divine appointment and the divine right of His King! Hallelujah! It's a crazy Kingdom, isn't it, with a crazy King, but it's doing the job, praise God! Because we've got a zany God who sure knows what He's doing!—Amen? Hallelujah!—Are you still with me?

27. AS FOR OUR RIGHT TO ABOLISH THE AMBASSADORS AND THE OLD FOREIGN MINISTRY, these were experiments conducted with our consent in the first place, so we have now simply withdrawn that consent, so they cease to exist as far as we're concerned. They were noble experiments, but as far as we can see have not accomplished sufficient results nor are sufficiently needed to warrant their continuance‚ so we hereby abolish them! So long, Lads and Gals!—Hope to see you in some far-flung field soon!

28. YOU SHOULD AT LEAST BE GLAD I DON'T ACTUALLY (AXUALLY?) CHOP OFF HEADS!—I just roll'em to other fields, amen? You like your crazy old King? Well‚ he's not quite as crazy as some may think!—You wait and see!

29. INCIDENTALLY, OF THAT NICE INTERNATIONAL CHILDCARE OFFICE full of Childcare secretaries which Deb will no longer be needing to merely read her Bishopric Mothers' reports, the new Bishops, Rachel and Emanuele‚ could make a good ready-made staff for their new Bishopric, and maybe have a few left over for other needier fields also, praise God!—Amen?

30. DOESN'T EVERYTHING WORK OUT NICELY WHEN THE KING HOLDS PRIVY COUNCILS WITH THE LORD IN THE PRIVY? Hallelujah! Everything just fits, doesn't it?—God knows best! "Let every man be found a liar, but God be found true!"

31. INCIDENTALLY ALSO, THAT PRIME MINISTER OF OURS IS CERTAINLY A WISE OLD BIRD to manage to raise free rent and full support for his wife and her childcare ministry out of what was his own Southern Bishopric, as well as a little on the side for himself, without having to take it out of the pockets of our International Office! Wasn't that clever? That's the kind of a Prime Minister we need, a man who really knows what he's doing and can really save the Kingdom and himself money!—God bless him!

32. INCIDENTALLY‚ WE ALSO NOTICE THAT THERE IS A VACANCY IN THE CENTRAL EUROPEAN BISHOPRIC, consisting of the French and Swiss Regions. So we suggest that the King's Council of Bishops immediately convene in spirit to combine the Southern half of France along with the French and Italian speaking portions of Switzerland into the Southern European Bishopric because of geographical proximity and French and Italian Romance languages akin to that of Italy‚ Spain and Portugal, as I long ago originally proposed.

33. OF COURSE, THIS WOULD VIRTUALLY WIPE OUT THE CENTRAL EUROPEAN BISHOPRIC‚ leaving only German speaking Switzerland and Northern France under its jurisdiction, which could easily be incorporated into our beloved Prime Minister's Northern European Bishopric without a great deal of trouble and thereby eliminate the need for such a Central European Bishopric at all, along with any additional Bishops! So fellows, you just lost your job before you even got it! Sorry!—But it's a Revolution and things change fast around here, even from one paragraph to another!

34. THE NORTH PACIFIC BISHOPRIC IS DOING SPLENDIDLY and blooming and booming under the most able direction and supervision of the Bishops West, Caleb and Lydia, and should survive very well, providing Josh doesn't do too much damage out there.—Ahem!—Are you listening, Josh? I know how you love those babes, but don't get carried away or you may be carrying a few more yourself!

35. THE EASTERN CANADIAN AND U.S. BISHOPRIC IS BEING STUPENDOUSLY ADMINISTERED under the phenomenal guidance of Rodent and Helah, the brilliant young couple whom some thought years ago were not even capable of running one Colony!—Just see how mistaken you can be! They're not only supporting themselves, but us as well, with one of the most amazing records in the world!

36. AND OF COURSE, OUR MOST WORTHY BISHOPS OF CENTRAL AND SOUTH AMERICA‚ CORNY AND SHALOM‚ AND THE BISHOPS OF MUSIC AND PIONEERING THERE, AMMINIDAB AND MARSENA, ARE DOING SUCH A FANTASTIC JOB that we have seriously considered the possibility that it may someday be necessary to elevate Corny to the position of Prime Minister so that dear Jeth can give more attention to his Bishopric! But we will hold off on that for awhile to see how he does at both jobs. If Jeth does as well with the Northern European Bishopric as he did with the southern, most of the rest of you Bishoprics may soon be incorporated into his anyway and there'll be no need of a Prime Minister, as the Bishop of Northern Europe will be running the world!—Ha! But we'll wait and see.

37. LAST BUT NOT LEAST IS THAT WATERY BISHOPRIC OF THE SOUTH PACIFIC AND SOUTHEAST ASIA (why don't we just call it "South Pacific" for short!) including a few land areas as dwell, so ably pioneered and administered by Shem and Shua who have also done an astounding job in creating something out of nothing in such a wild and woolly area! We refuse to accept your resignation, Shem, and we think you're doing great, my little wild wild wind Shua!

38. "STAND FAST THEREFORE IN THE LIBERTY WHEREWITH CHRIST HATH MADE US FREE and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage!"—Galations 5:1. I was the one who personally intervened in your behalf because I love you and I know you love me. So don't let anybody push you around, much less some of these old bottle leaders! It's a new day and a new Revolution! Hallelujah! Sock it to 'em! Praise God!

39. I GUESS WE WON'T HAVE TO SHAKE UP THE INTERNATIONAL OFFICE as they must already be pretty shook by this time, and most of them are already doing a very good job, especially Justus Pound with his Spirit-led administration of Finances and his excellent and thorough reports, the most faithful of the lot!

40. JUSTUS ASHTREE, AS WELL, IS DOING AN EXCELLENT JOB ON PUBLICATIONS and we heartily agree with his proposed organisational changes of his own staff. Jered, too, is doing a great job with his Computer, even though I can't understand half of what he's talking about. I'll just have to take his word for it, but I have gotten all those juicy statistics out of that stack of stuff he sends me.

41. OUR OWN PERSONAL SECRETARY THERE IS ALSO DOING AN INSPIRED JOB of answering our mail and feeding our sheep as a faithful Shepherdess of her flock in her ministry of the mail!—God bless her! She's got a real heart for needy souls and a compassion for the lost!—That's the kind of Shepherds and Shepherdesses we need!

42. WELL, I GUESS THAT ABOUT WRAPS IT UP FOR NOW, as I don't think I should interfere in the affairs of you local Regions‚ Districts and Colonies. But you Bishoprics are my business‚ and so I have spoken what I feel is best, and you can take it or leave it. All theses changes of course, are subject to your united majority approval.

43. SO WE HAVE HEREBY ABOLISHED: The Ambassadors, the old Foreign Ministry, the power of the Ministerial Council and replaced it with the King's Council of Bishops as a general administrative body. We have also abolished two Bishoprics and incorporated them into another two, for whom we have appointed new Bishops. We have also abolished the totalitarian power of the top international leaders and scattered most of the Ministers around the world in new capacities where we feel they can do more good as supervisors rather than gubernatorial administrators—somewhat like the President's Cabinet: Supervisors not rulers.

44. WE HAVE ALSO ABOLISHED THE ANTIQUATED, OVERDUPLICATED REPORTING SYSTEM. so that each of you need only report to you immediate superiors once every two weeks, although you must still send carbon copies to the others as before‚ thus cutting the work of reporting and reading reports in half!

45. WE HAVE ALSO ABOLISHED THE ARBITRARY APPOINTMENT OF LEADERSHIP without the consent of both those governing and those governed, and established a new chain of co–operation which requires the agreement of all affected. We've also abolished a few offices and Colonies in the process whose personnel and equipment and expense can be much better used in needier fields.

46. WE'VE ALSO ABOLISHED THE UNAUTHORIZED SOLICITATION OF REPORTS by Departments not commissioned to ask for them. We've also abolished your weekly reporting to me in exchange for a brief monthly report from each Ministry and Department.

47. WE HAVE ALSO ABOLISHED ANY ROYAL FLESH-AND-BLOOD PRIORITIES OF THE DISOBEDIENT OVER THOSE WHO OBEY!—IT'S A "BLOODLESS COUP" FOR CHRIST! HALLELUJAH! Flesh and Blood cannot inherit the Kingdom‚ but he that doeth the will of the Father!"—Amen?—God bless you all—but particularly the obedient, faithful and loyal! Are you still with me?—It's a "Bloodless Coup!"—We hope!—Are you a rebel or one of the King Loyalists? If so‚ shout: "Long Live the King!—Jesus!"

48. AND YOU'LL BE AMAZED AT THE SWEEPING, FAR-REACHING CHANGES TO BE MADE YET FURTHER in the following Letter, "The COLONY REVOLUTION!" It's a total A-Bomb that's gonna splatter us all over the world! Hold your breath!