KEYWORDS: lord, juan, people, things, way, love

Mama's Letters of Counsel to Juan, Abi & Dust--Letter No.2, Part II

Karen Zerby

—By MariaMaria #118 DO 2622 5/90

(Please read Mama's Letters of Counsel in GNs 434 & 437 before reading this Letter. Tx!)

1. Now is the Lord's time to zero-in on personal habits & growth & clinical training so we can be even better samples, & even better witnesses for Jesus! This is a new day & a new period in our growth. It will have nothing to do with whether we're nationals or we're foreigners, or whether we're shepherds or sheep. The important thing is that we are yielded to Jesus, have signed a blank sheet of paper & desperately desire His Will for our lives, & are committed to making whatever change is necessary, no matter what it takes! If we can fulfil these requirements, then we'll be successful in whatever training comes our way!

2. How fast we grow & change will depend on how yielded we are. Even with a late start, I believe that you & all of our sweet people in Latin America who are truly yielded will be able to catch up with & even possibly overtake others who have been benefiting from good training for years, especially those who are still refusing to change old habits & manifest a humble, sacrificial "little people" spirit.

3. There are some people, sad to say, who have had the opportunity of receiving very good training for years‚ but because they have refused to make the needed changes in their lives, they remain old bottles—inflexible, stuck-in–a-rut, self-righteous‚ having the form & all the right words, but without the power & the love thereof. They've learned the letter of the law which killeth, but not the Spirit which maketh alive. After seeing your progress, Juan, I believe the Lord can change anyone as quickly as they desperately want to be changed‚ & as much as they are willing to endure the dying daily which it demands.


4. So, Juan, I want to commend you again for going ahead of your flock as a good shepherd & leading the way by being a good sample to them of forsaking pride, sensitivity, old habits, independence, & admitting that there is a better way, & desiring with all your heart to have it. Now, as a result of your yieldedness & commitment, the Lord has done the rest: Given you a multitude of victories one after the other in the form of dramatic changes in many areas of your life, & He has begun the process of making you a new creature in Him, & enabling you to walk in newness of life.

5. Sure‚ the old habits crop up frequently to try to discourage us & make us feel like we haven't changed & we haven't gotten the victory, but they're just lying vanities. So just rebuke the Enemy & try again! "Whom the Lord hath made free shall be free indeed!"—Jn.8:36. He's done the work but it may take you awhile to indeed see the evidence of it. Right now you have to believe by faith. But as you put your faith into action, you will begin to see the results!

6. We realise that you never received very good training in the areas of communications & handling of people, & in fact, to the contrary‚ you received very poor training. Nevertheless, your love for Jesus & for the Word, for us & for your flock, & your obedience to Him, have far outweighed any lacks in these areas, & we believe your heart has been right before the Lord. Sometimes Man looks on the outward appearance but God looks on the heart!—1Sam.16:7.

7. In the areas I've mentioned above where you are far behind, I believe the Lord is going to help you catch up quickly because of your sincerity & desire to learn & your yieldedness to the Lord. I love you very much, Juan, & consider you a very precious man, in tune with the Lord, & loyal‚ obedient, full of faith, vision & initiative. I know the Lord didn't make a mistake in putting you in this position.


8. You're not the only ones who have lessons to learn. While Dad was praying for me the other night, the Lord told him that the reason He couldn't heal my eyes yet was because I had a lot more lessons to learn if I was going to become the Queen that He wanted to make me. Right now I'm still pretty much learning to be a good follower of the Lord & of Dad, & learning to be a good deacon & to take care of a lot of the business, administration & organisation of the Family that Dad should not have to be so burdened with & involved in anyway.

9. Of course, he did have to be deeply involved in it for a long time, many years, until he was able to train me & Peter & others to take more responsibility in these areas. Although he continues to be very involved with the major plans & major new directions the Family takes, & although he leads the Family by the directions he gets from the Lord both spiritually & organisationally, he leaves a lot of the lesser details up to us so he can spend his time in the Word & prayer & doing the Prophet's job that he was meant to do.

10. I am trying to help him by doing some of the deacon's job that he shouldn't have to do, & tend to the things that would keep him from giving his full time to the Lord & the Word & prayer. Even all of the details of administration that I'm covering in this Letter to you are things Dad expects me to take care of, while he gets the general guidance & direction from the Lord, such as the "Latin America Is It" revelation that helped us to turn more of our attention towards Latin America. (See ML #2573, GN 403) Anyway, it should encourage you that you're not the only ones who are learning lessons now!—We all are, including me! PTL!


11. You know, I don't dream very often, or if I do I don't remember them later, but the other morning I woke up just having had a dream. To summarise it: I was comforting Peter, who was very discouraged about two of his children, Praise & Jonathan, that they were not making the changes that he felt were needed in their lives. He was so concerned about it he was crying, & in the dream I was comforting him & encouraging him that, "I'm sure that they're going to change & that they will make it, because look at some of our leadership who have made such radical changes after so many years!"

12. I remember, Juan, you were my prime example!—And I was telling Peter that if you could go through all of these changes, then certainly there was no question that his & Abi's two teens were going to make it over this period & have some glorious victories eventually & be very used of the Lord. Also I remember that I was using Shem as another example of someone who had made a very big change for the better in his life. So, Abi, this should encourage both you & Juan, & if you wish, you could tell Jonathan & Praise about my dream.


13. So, Juan, please don't let the Enemy make you feel like you are no good & "Look at all the mistakes that have been made in Latin America & they're all your fault!" Number one, the Lord has used you tremendously. Number two, though a lot of mistakes have been made, it's not all your fault. Mistakes have been made in every part of the World by all the leadership.—From the very top leaders down through the Home Shepherds.

14. We certainly do learn through our mistakes, & you shouldn't feel too discouraged about them. Don't let the Enemy get you under condemnation. Don't forget, there have been a lot of other leaders in Latin America as well for the last few years. You couldn't possibly be responsible for everything that's been done in South America!—"Let every man give account of himself before God!"—Rom.14:12.


15. Juan, Abi says she has the highest regard for you, & she has said how much she is learning from you about fighting & holding on to the Word.


16. I'm glad, Juan‚ you have decided to pretty much speak in English within your small council meetings because I do think it helps you to stay more on guard than if you were speaking in Spanish‚ & to be less familiar with the people there. So I commend you for your decision on that. But of course‚ in your large meetings where mostly everyone speaks Spanish‚ you should continue to speak in Spanish. Just make sure that those who don't understand Spanish have a good translator or interpreter.


17. I'm really proud of the people there at your place! They're being real good samples in trying to do their best to conform to the training & to welcome the needed changes.


18. Juan, I think it's real sweet how you & Abi can go out to a little place for dinner once in awhile. I think it's not only sweet, but very needed for you, as such busy top leaders. Possibly you would want to include Dust in these dinner dates as well, as it's good for you all to not only work together, but also have the opportunity to relax together.


19. That was real good news about your plans to get a cheap little place nearby for R&R (Rest & Recuperation) so that those in your Training Center have the opportunity to take some time off every week or so. I definitely think you need it.—And where there's a need, we can expect the Lord to supply!


20. I know it's difficult in a teamwork to always find the time to fill each other in on all the business & talks that you have with others. We have a problem with that ourselves sometimes‚ even informing each other of the talks we've had with others just in our Home! I was thinking about how you could do this more faithfully, & it came to me that you could make each other a 10 or 15-minute tape summarising the highlights of any business you've transacted or any counselling you've done with others. Then these tapes could be listened to even when you are not available to each other, & could be left for you on your desk so that you could listen to it whenever you have a few minutes available.


21. I suppose Dust has told you how he appreciates you, Juan‚ but I might quote here, (if you'll allow me‚ Dust) what he said in his recent report tape to us:

22. "I couldn't help but be very impressed by Juan. What especially impresses me is how willing Juan has been to forsake his own pride & sensitivity & how excited & enthusiastic & receptive he is about the changes that are taking place in his own life personally & in the Work in Latin America. During one of the first meetings I attended while here, he was so enthusiastic in welcoming & backing the training that's about to take place.—And at the same time, he honestly acknowledged his own shortcomings & weaknesses. Another thing that stood out to me about Juan is his love & loyalty to Dad & to Mama. These seem to be quite outstanding to me.

23. "Another point that I'm very impressed with & for which I deeply admire Juan is his willingness & ability to `take it.'—His willingness to acknowledge his shortcomings & his strong desire to want to change. Juan is by nature a very proud Latin man, yet he is willing to forsake all that because his love for the Lord & the Family, & for Dad & you, simply outweighs his pride. In other words, his love for Jesus outweighs his pride. His love for Jesus is greater than his pride & his sensitivity, & he is willing to forsake those things to be what Jesus wants him to be.

24. "Juan also seems to be quite strong in the Word, both in his everyday conversation & in his talks & exhortations to the flock & individuals. He is constantly referring to the Letters & the Scriptures, & quoting them. The Lord seems to really anoint Juan in his talks & exhortations.

25. "Being around Juan these last few days I'm very convinced, more than ever, that Juan is the man for the job! And I very much agree with you, Mama, that he is a very precious man, in tune with the Lord, loyal, obedient, full of faith, vision, & initiative.—And I already love him very much as you do. And I also very much believe that the Lord has put him in this leadership role, & that the Lord still wants him in this position."


26. One more thing I wanted to comment on‚ Juan, is your first rough draft of your video presentation. I thought it was very good. You did real well & I was very proud of you for venturing out into something new that you'd never done before, & doing a real good job on it—with the Lord's help. Your prayers were really touching & heart-felt, & I think it's going to be a big blessing to the Latin Family.

27. Now normally we don't get involved in details like suggesting what you should say on a video, or editing your TLC Newsletters, let alone commenting on what language you hold your council meetings in!—But in order to advise you now on the eve of your Continent-wide training program getting underway, we are zeroing-in on some of these things to try to help you get off to a good start.

28. We were thinking that since this video doesn't have to have a time limit on it, that Abi & Dust could also take the opportunity to each share what is on their hearts, more than just the few words of greeting that we previously suggested.


29. Abi, maybe it would be good for you to share your testimony of the big change that you had to go through in Japan when Peter visited & moved in at the School there. You could probably identify with how some of the folks in Latin America may be tempted to feel, with all of these changes coming about—not only in actual training centres—but in every Home in Latin America. You could mention how most of us have our own little way of doing things, & like to have everything set up & running the way we want it to. And then when all kinds of changes start occurring & really "upsetting" some things, we sometimes get upset as well!

30. You could give your history, how you worked in Units & you worked at the Jumbo & had received a lot of training & counsel. Then when you went to Japan you were one of the main Shepherds in charge of the Japan School & the training there, & you were modelling it after what you had done in previous situations. But then when Peter came & was able to spend some months at the School in a supervisory position, he ventured out with many new changes & ideas, a lot of them resulting from direct counsel from Dad.

31. And that was when you realised more than ever before that you weren't so open to change. In fact, you resisted it to such an extent that you began to get into a real bad state. You could explain how you became critical & self-righteous etc., & that you got to the point that you were so out of it that you had to have a major deliverance.

32. You could tell them that you hope that when these changes are presented to them that they don't react the way that you did, but that they will be open to change & yielded. Explain how you ended up having to make the changes anyway, but that it became a lot easier & you grew a lot more when you finally just yielded to them. Explain that once you start that resistance & rebellion & not yielding, you can get very far afield & actually become so far gone that it is very difficult to pull out of it.

33. The yielding is the initial step that the Enemy fights so much. After you've yielded, the rest of it is relatively easy! But when you don't yield initially, then everything is very hard, & it's just fight, fight, fighting the Lord's Will the whole way through! It's just a constant battle & you get resentful, bitter, rebellious, critical‚ practically every bad thing you can think of if you don't yield! And the Lord's Work goes on without you anyway, & you get left behind & eventually cast aside if you don't get the victory.

34. You could give them a warning of what happened as a result, & how you really went through it & ended up in a very bad state. Because we don't want to give anybody the excuse that‚ "Well‚ Abi is a top leader & she said she resisted change so we can do it too," you need to show what torment of mind you went through & how it was very difficult for you when you resisted.—And it was not only difficult for you but for other people who had to work with you!

35. I know you've given this testimony to individuals quite often & you've probably had lots of practice at it by now, so with the Lord's help, it should be fairly easy for you to give it on video. You've got to have that warning attached to it‚ that, "If you don't yield‚ the same thing could happen to you, or even worse!"


36. And, Dust, I think you could say something similar to what you said in your report to us‚ some of which I quoted earlier for Juan. You could also bring out the other fact you mentioned in your report‚ from when you were in Argentina some years ago. You were a DAS there, when Faithy & Juan passed through on their "String of Pearls" visit, & you felt that some things were handled improperly & you even felt that you were mistreated. But that doesn't keep you from loving Juan & admiring him, because he's learned from his mistakes. We have all made a lot of mistakes, & because we've repented & apologised, the Lord has forgiven us & we hope others have forgiven us too. Besides, it wasn't his intent to hurt anyone.

37. Maybe you could even weave your recent failing in Scandinavia in there somewhere, pointing out that you've also made your share of mistakes not only in the distant past, but you're continuing to make mistakes. Bring out how we all are sinners together, saved by grace, & we just have to continue to keep trying & keep repenting & keep forgiving one another.—And all just looking unto Jesus to pull us all through together! So‚ Dust, this is the other reason why I think the Lord allowed that to happen—so that you would have a fresh new example of a recent failing that you could share with others to show that you understand them, & that you can relate to them & their failings because you're not so perfect yourself.


38. And for your part, Juan, other than the very good message that you have already presented to us for our approval, I think it would be very helpful & would diffuse a lot of people's criticism if you would tell them something like you've already told us: That, since you've been receiving this training, you're seeing that there are many ways in which you did things & different ways you acted, & some of your methods of operation that may have hurt or offended some of them.—And that it really breaks your heart to think that you've offended people or mistreated them or mishandled them in any way.—That you love them very much & never wanted to do anything to hurt them, & that you've asked the Lord & us to forgive you.—And you hope they will forgive you as well. As the top leader of Latin America, you do take the responsibility for many of its problems. And as you mentioned in your report, now you want to do all you can to get behind this training programme & to change & to be a good sample of how things should be done in counsel & working together in unity, love, openness & honesty.

39. You've told all of this to us, Juan, so I know you'll want to say the same to them. Whenever new methods are taught & new procedures implemented, it's human nature for people to look back on the old & criticise the way things were done before, & consequently the people who instituted or allowed them. Part of it is usually justified & part of it is unjustified, but nevertheless it usually happens. And since you're the only leader, or at least the major one, in evidence, they usually will blame things on you. So whether you are wrong or not, if they think you're wrong, it's best to apologise & to set a good sample for others in asking for forgiveness since most of them also could have done better‚ & will probably need to apologise themselves to someone. And by your doing so, you set a good example.

40. There‚ now you all have a difficult assignment! But I know the Lord will give you the grace & we'll certainly be praying for you. I'm afraid, Juan‚ you'll have to bear the blame for a lot of past leaders' shenanigans & activities.—And there are probably a lot of things people still hold against them that they might hold against you as well. You'll also have to take the blame for things done since then‚ when, although you were doing your best‚ in some cases you just didn't know what to do or how to do it & may have erred by not counselling with others enough, or laxness in correcting others‚ or lack of clarity when giving instructions‚ etc.

41. Well, you may feel like you have more NWOs than anyone else! But the truth is that the entire Family is in the same boat! It's just that if you are one of the top leaders, your NWOs get scrutinised much more closely than anyone else's, & you also get more criticism.—Especially when you make mistakes.

42. Sometimes people can be pretty hard & self-righteous, not having "walked in your shoes" or realised your circumstances. But thank the Lord, most of our Family is very forgiving & very precious & very loving as a whole. I think most of them realise that leadership isn't easy, since many of them have had to be leaders at one level or another. That's what goes along with leadership, not only the credit but also the blame, justified & unjustified. We all admire you, Juan, for being able to "take it," passing the credit for the good things on to the Lord & taking the blame yourself for the bad. God bless you!


43. On another subject‚ you'll be thrilled to know that we're about to pub the first sections of the "Summit '90 Notes" in a series of FSMs that Peter has been editing. These first sections include the main & most important topic, prayer. In addition to these we'll be pubbing in the GN some of the things the Lord has given us on prayer. We have some other inspiring material on this subject, & even some specific prayers which we'll be pubbing as well, DV, even prayer material for our children, so the whole Family can participate at the same time in this "prayer push."


44. Some people are probably going to look at all this prayer material & say, "Wow! A Prayer Revolution!—A big new subject! All this new material we've never had before!" It reminds me a little of the story of the evangelist & the pastor: The pastor has been preaching a certain message for years, & the evangelist comes in for a one-week meeting & emphasises the same subject, & everybody goes all ga-ga over it as though they'd never heard it before!

45. Juan, you may be tempted to feel somewhat similar, in that here you were the pastor & you were preaching some of these things for years, but when the new training push comes along with new leadership & they say some of the same things, all of a sudden people respond like, "Oh, we've never heard it or seen that before, & it's so wonderful!" You'll just have to roll with the punches & forgive people for their denseness, & just be glad they're finally getting it!—Because that's just human nature! Things have to be repeated over & over & over, & many times people don't get it until it's said some different way by a different person, or shown to them in a different context.

46. In my Letters on Prayer that we're now working on, I'm not really saying anything different from what Dad has always said & always practiced! I'm just saying it in a slightly different way & putting a renewed concentrated emphasis on it. And everybody we've shared it with is all turned on to prayer all of a sudden! Well, praise the Lord, I'm glad they're getting turned on to prayer if they haven't been before. But really, there's no excuse because Dad has preached & practiced this since the beginning.

47. I think one of the major reasons for people thinking it's something new when it's presented by a different person or in a different context is often because formerly the "pastor," for example, may have been preaching the same thing over a period of many years, but it wasn't in such a concentrated dose as when the "evangelist" comes in for just one week & really socks it to them on that subject every night.

48. Dad has preached on prayer for years & years. Then I come out with a couple of GNs totally dedicated to the subject of prayer at the same time that Peter comes out with a couple of FSMs totally on prayer. It's all put together in a very concentrated form, & suddenly a lot of people wake up & get the point! Juan, some of the things you've probably been saying for years are now being said by the new leadership, but they're saying them in a new context with a concentrated training push, & people suddenly get the point.

49. Just thank God that they do finally get the point! And whoever gets the credit, let's try not to mind. Let's just be thankful that the Lord is getting the credit & that people are finally seeing the Light! PTL!

50. OK! Praise the Lord! I love you! God bless & keep you! It's been so good talking to you, & I hope it hasn't been too hard for you. If you'd like to do separate taped reactions to this Letter, you're welcome to, & you don't have to wait until your next scheduled reporting time.

I love you!—Mama


51. Juan‚ Abi & Dust, I know that some of the topics I've touched on in this Letter will undoubtedly strike at some of your sensitive spots‚ especially if you haven't already discussed these things with each other. But maybe you just need my little push to help you start getting everything out in the open so you can discuss it & pray about it instead of letting things fester inside through misunderstanding & misinterpretation. If some of my counsel seems a little one–sided, that's probably because I only got one side to comment on.—In other words‚ only one of you mentioned the subject. But I figured in the long run you'd probably rather have me bring it up & say something about it than nothing; at least it will help you get it out in the open & get things cleared up & come to a good understanding about things.

52. So please don't be offended at each other for not speaking up about some of these things prior to telling them to me on tape. Perhaps what I've said in this Letter will make it easier to discuss these things together. If you all make an agreement that you won't mind what the other says in his communications to us, it may help in your relationship‚ & as a result help the Work, plus you may be able to get some good counsel on these smaller issues that will prevent your having more serious misunderstandings. Of course‚ the ideal is to discuss such matters openly together without needing us to mediate, & we believe that, in time, you'll be able to do this.

53. And speaking of getting things all out in the open, I have a request. If this idea of getting everything all out in the open seems like a difficult thing to do amongst the three of you‚ what I'm going to ask you about now may be even more difficult.

54. The Lord had put the burden on my heart to give some sort of message to the Family in Latin America on the eve of this Continent-wide training push. Initially I had thought of writing something to the Family there which one of you could read & include in the video you're making. But the more we prayed about & discussed it, the less I seemed to be able to know what to say.

55. Finally, after I got this Letter dictated to you, the Lord gave me the answer: That it would be more effective to publish this Letter for the World, many areas of which are now beginning training pushes. So rather than only the Family in Latin America benefiting from a little speech dictated to them, all of the Family could also partake of the counsel given herein, & learn from your good example‚ Juan, of taking correction, taking the blame, being open to change, accepting training, welcoming new leadership moving in with you, breaking old habits & making new ones! It would also show them that we're not just talking about putting an emphasis on training in all areas, but we're actually doing something about it.

56. It will, DV, motivate them to follow the sample that all three of you are being in learning to work together, & unselfishly forsaking much of the independence that each of you have had previously, to form a strong united three-fold cord. I discussed this idea with Peter & others, & the idea seemed good to them too. So now we just want to ask your permission since, of course, this has been a very personal Letter to you three, & has many things in it that if published would, of course, be another forsaking of your pride & sensitivity. But I really believe the Family will admire you for it & will want to follow your very good sample. However, we won't do anything further on this until we hear your answer regarding this idea. (They all cheerfully agreed to pubbing these Letters for you, GB'm!)

57. P.P.S. Just after dictating this Letter we received your latest report tapes: I was real pleased to see that things are going well amongst you & in the Work there. You answered some of the points in these latest tapes that I had talked about in the Letter above, & it seems like you're pretty much in tune. So there doesn't seem to be too much that I have to tell you in response to your tapes except that they were very good & a very good example of reporting.—Inspiring news & wonderful progress!


58. That's an interesting verse that the Lord has been giving you, Juan, Psa.119:71, which‚ as you said, has a slightly different translation in the Spanish Bible: "It is good for me that I have been humbled, that I might learn Thy Statutes."

59. We understand how it must have been humbling &, in fact‚ even devastating, to hear that comment by someone, to the effect that before the new leadership arrived in Latin America recently they had not known if the Letters could really be lived or not! To think that the thing you really desired the most—to be a reflection of the same love & mercy that we have been to you—you fell short of. And, as you said, it's also been quite humbling for you to have your different weaknesses exposed, & the weaknesses of the whole area. But even if you failed to show ours & the Lord's Love to others as much as you would have liked, I'm sure the Lord knew you wanted to, & He has answered your prayers by bringing some others who could help you in this job.

60. But, thank the Lord, Juan‚ that it has caused you to go to the Word with a much more open spirit & made you able to say, "It is good for me to be humbled, because now I am desiring the Word more than ever!" And so you can also say, "Thank the Lord I desire my NWOs to be exposed to people now." When I heard you say that, I knew what a tremendous victory you had won! Hallelujah!


61. Abi‚ Dust was commending you for your training sessions & Shepherd's meetings, & says the Lord really leads you & you do very well.

62. Abi, good for you for trying to answer people's OHRs at your local Training Center, at least for a little while. I know you can't keep it up, but you can explain that the fact that you've made an effort & you've done it for awhile shows that you really love them & are concerned about them, but hopefully soon you're going to have to share the burden with others & teach others how to do the job.


63. And‚ yes, Juan, I certainly agree with the viewpoint you've shared with Abi, that if you can't get any further trained personnel from the East‚ the Lord is going to have to do the job without them by raising up local personnel. I know trained people are always a blessing & a help, & you have to have somebody that is trained to start with‚ but you do have somebody, & that's you, Abi, & now Dust, & even a few others, so I'm sure the Lord is going to use the ones He's supplied to do the job.

64. I don't foresee very many other people being freed to go to Latin America from the East, since so many have already left Japan & Thailand, & they are now very much hurting for personnel themselves. It may take you longer without more trained personnel to train those in your care, but it's not impossible, & in fact, it's very possible, & we know the Lord will help you to do it! You'll have to use what's already in your hand, but the Lord is very able.


65. Praise the Lord, Dust, for that good report on your loss of weight since you've been in Latin America! PTL! I'm sure it's very encouraging to see what the Lord can do with real cooperation from you. I liked your explanation to our Family teen: "Just because Uncle Dust at 43 is overweight & doesn't eat bread is no reason for a slim 17-year-old not to eat her bread."

66. I was glad to hear‚ Dust, that you hadn't been drinking any alcohol since you'd been there, & that you didn't miss it at all. Therefore, I guess you were probably able to accept our restrictions a lot more easily since you had already put such restrictions into effect yourself before we even mentioned anything about them. I've got to commend you for your thought of possibly putting yourself under a restriction of not ever touching any more alcohol, but I don't think you would be able to live up to that by yourself, & that's why our making the rule & the restriction will be more effective in helping you to keep it.


67. Dust, I had to laugh when you were talking about how you were proud of Europe becoming number one in the stats & that perhaps your motivation wasn't altogether pure! I talked to Juan once about that same thing, that even if his motives for wanting Latin America to be number one in the stats were out of pride or competitiveness or whatever, the Lord even uses our natural tendencies, & sometimes even our rather questionable motivations, to accomplish His Will & His purpose! I'm sure He would prefer that our motives were altogether pure, but He wants to get His job done & He'll use whatever He can to get it done. So I wouldn't feel too bad about wanting to be number one. I just hope that now you'll strive to invest as much in the Latin work as you did in Europe.


68. And if you don't know why you're there yet‚ or don't see how you're needed as much in Latin America as you were in Europe, well, just wait awhile & I'm sure you'll find out!—Either you will see it for yourself, or the Lord will show you‚ or Juan & Abi will tell you, or Dad & I will tell you! But one way or the other, I'm sure you'll find out soon. I think that's a very normal reaction when a person is transferred from one job to another: The interim period is more of a rest, "get acquainted‚ learn-what-your-role–is-to-be" time. So, be patient & trust the Lord that you're in the right place, & what you have to take by faith now, you'll know by sight soon. (Well, I was glad to hear later on in your tape, Dust‚ that you've gotten a victory over this. Praise the Lord! I knew you would!)

69. I'm glad you've put yourself in the learning mode & see that there is a whole lot you can learn from Abi & Juan. And I'm sure there are lots of things that they can learn from you as well.


70. Dust, we're thankful that you've been willing to leave your wife & children temporarily behind in Europe where she is very needed, while you take up your new duties in Latin America. In fact, you've had to do this a couple of times, & it's certainly borne good fruit. (Hopefully Anne & children will be able to join you in Latin America in the next few months‚ DV.) We understand that it's a personal sacrifice, but the Lord has definitely honoured it. You too, Abi‚ have had to do likewise, forsake those whom you were close to, & be apart from your children a great deal of the time.

71. In fact, if you look at virtually all of the top leadership of North & South America at this time, one reason why all of them are being so mightily used could very well be because they too said "yes" to the Lord when they were brought to a decision in their life as to whether they were going to insist on staying with their mate or splitting up & working in separate ministries for the Work's sake. Although it was understandably difficult & caused some personal pain, especially at first, their present ministries & fruitfulness far exceed the comparatively small sacrifice they may have had to make.

72. It seems that this is often part of the price of leadership. This is something the Lord has been requiring more & more of our leadership, mainly because they've proven to be more effective separate than together. Of course, there is no need for me to repeat everything I've already said in the "Separations" Letter‚ but it's wonderful to see more good fruit borne as a result of many of our leaders' willingness to sacrificially separate for the Work's sake.


73. Well, praise the Lord! I love you all very much & am certainly praying for you in these exciting & challenging times! I'm real proud of you all for continuing to fight in spite of the discouragements & disappointments & obstacles. The more you fight, the stronger you become! Just make sure you're fighting the Devil & not each other!

74. And make sure you're encouraging each other & loving each other as He has loved you. —Growing together in love & in Him! And may the peace of God that passeth all understanding, keep your hearts & minds through Christ Jesus, Who is able to keep you from falling & to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy!—Phil.4:7; Jude.24. Amen! ILY & PFY!

—Much love, Mama



We received your beautiful Letters, & I can't find the words to describe everything that I would like to say about them! All I can say is, "Amen," Mama! Your talk on familiarity hit the nail right on the head, & by God's grace & through His strength & by strengthening myself through the Word, I want to become the new creature that I need to be if I'm going to continue to be used by the Lord & you.

That beautiful prayer that I've always read over & over, "Lord Byron's Surrender," is still my prayer, & I just want to be your servant & fight the battles that need to be fought for my King & Queen in whatever land you would like me to be in.

Thank you for the warnings, but most of all, thank you for the encouraging words that you gave of how the Lord can do it. I have that assurance that as long as I submit & yield & obey, then He will do it, because we can do all things through Christ Who strengtheneth us! PTL!

Just the other day we were reading this beautiful Letter, "How to be a Good Executive" (ML #263), & so many things spoke so clearly to my heart. It was sort of like, "Where have I been all these years?" It's so true that as we desperately seek the Lord & pray‚ He certainly opens our eyes to these wonderful truths that have always been there. I guess I wasn't receptive enough to it before! Lord help me & forgive me!—And I know He is helping me & forgiving me! TYJ! How thankful I am for this time!—Because I can see the Lord's Love & mercy for me, & through the Word & through the fellowship that I'm having with Abi & Dust & learning as we communicate together, I really see the Lord helping to change me! I thank the Lord for it!

Abi has been telling me how happy she is that people here seem to be receiving the changes so well, which to me is a real encouragement. By God's grace‚ I pray that the Lord is helping me to be a sample, to not be resistant to changes‚ but to really desire them‚ to really want them, as I know that that's half the victory‚ to have that desire in your heart, to want the change & not to be resistant to it. The other half then comes easy.

I'd like to once again apologise for my many mistakes through the past years‚ & all the areas in which I've come very short of the mark. The Lord knows that my heart feels very broken when I hear testimonies of situations & people here in Latin America who were not taken care of properly. I'm just really clinging to His promise‚ that through a broken heart He'll draw nigh unto me; and instead of having a proud & haughty attitude, that my spirit will learn to be more meek & humble, more like the spirit of David. In Jesus' name.

A good Scripture that the Lord has given me lately is, "It is good for me to have been afflicted so that I can learn from Your Statutes." However, in Spanish it's a little bit different because the way it's translated is, "It is good for me to have been humbled." And I was thinking about this Scripture as I was praying about what the person here said about not knowing whether the Letters could actually be lived or not, & I was feeling so bad that in a way it's a reflection of my past leadership & different weaknesses.—These poor people who have been serving the Lord for so many years & giving their lives for the Lord, trying their best to serve Him, in a way have been hindered by my sample.

Of course‚ that really hurts deep inside, & in a way it has really humbled me to realise that the thing that I had desired the most, the thing that I can truly honestly say I wish I could be to people—a reflection of the same love & mercy that you have been to me—the thing that I wanted to be the most, I have not been.

Maybe I had become a little bit self-satisfied with all the progress that was being made, although I truly know that if any good has come out of this area, it was the Lord. But maybe I was beginning to feel exalted in a way & take part of the credit because we were receiving so much credit & so many words of encouragement from Dad & from you & from everybody. Perhaps I was departing away from the Word & thinking too highly of myself. So to all of a sudden be exposed to my different weaknesses & the weaknesses of this area has really humbled me.

Now I'm going to the Word with a much more open mind, & the Word has become a lot more alive in my life. Just like that Scripture says, "It's good for me to have been humbled," because now I'm learning, I'm desiring the Word more than anything else, by God's grace. Actually, I desire my NWOs to be exposed to people & for them to see my different weaknesses.—Especially since I have remained in this position of leadership, which I know I don't deserve, & I know it's just by the mercy of the Lord. So I see a real need for people to see & hear about the different failures & shortcomings that I have in my own walk with the Lord. Because otherwise, they might be a little bit confused when they see I'm still in this position.

So for my shortcomings to be exposed, by God's grace, it will help people here to realise more & more about the everlasting mercies of David, & also about the specific changes that need to take place in my life. So I sincerely want those weaknesses to be exposed.—And I know that this in itself is a real miracle because in the past I've been very fearful of exposure, like you brought out, Mama, in the Letter "Failure—A Victory Out of Seeming Defeat." (See DB 2, Pg.598)

I truly believe that by God's grace He's really given me a victory in this area, & I really do desire this exposure, especially so that the dear Family here will realise that that is not the way you & Dad are. And anything that can be done to portray what you are to people, that's what my heart really desires, so that the people here can grow & learn to be more like you, & not more like some of us leaders who have in many ways come very short of the mark. PTL!

I'd like to share with you another important lesson that I feel the Lord has been showing me: Although I've recently begun to really see & realise just how bad & how nothing I am‚ I'm also seeing how the Lord's Love for me hasn't been dependent on how good I was—or thought I was. The reason He loves me isn't because of my accomplishments.

Actually, I have known all along that it's been just the Lord that anything good has happened. Nevertheless, because of my pride, I previously sort of felt like, "Well‚ praise the Lord, I know it's the Lord, but I'm helping the Lord a little bit!" So although I always thought it was the Lord, I guess I was feeling that I deserved some of the love & encouragement you've shown me. After all, I was "doing a lot of hard work!"—Lord help me!

But in the past few months‚ the Lord in His Love has seen fit to zero-in on this area, & also zero-in on my walk with Him, & help me, by God's grace, to realise & begin to overcome my many weaknesses. All of a sudden my eyes are being opened to see my NWOs.

I'm seeing more & more how weak I am & all the mistakes I've made through these past years. In other words, I'm realising that I have nothing in which to pride myself‚ & I truly do feel like a real mess & like a sinner, & I know I don't deserve anything. Nevertheless, I just feel like I'm receiving so much!—There are so many words of praise & encouragement in your Letters, I just don't see how the Lord could love me so much!

So I feel that one of the main lessons He is trying to teach me is to realise what a great Love He has for me. Then, by God's grace, I pray that all of this is really helping me to have a greater love for Him & to desire to have more fellowship with Him. I'm having to really go to the Word for strength, whereas in the past I've relied a lot on my own strength. I guess I'm learning a lot more about what it means to be weak in my own strength & stronger in the Lord.

In these past few weeks I've learned to look more unto Him, & I'm learning more about His Love & His mercies, which I hope will give me a more tender heart.—That He will take away the heart of stone & make it a heart of flesh so that "to whom much hath been forgiven, the same loveth much."

I guess I was so hard–headed & hard-hearted before, there are probably so many people that I have offended & hurt in the past. I didn't even realise it, I wasn't even aware of how I was hurting them, Lord help me! So I pray that He will now give me a heart of flesh so that I can really feel for people.

And my prayer is (not that I think I'll ever be like you, Mama—or Dad—because I realise the special anointing & mission that the Lord has given you), but I'm asking Him to give me more of a heart like yours. I've always seen that gift in you, how you put yourself in other people's shoes & feel what they feel.—Thus you can comfort them with that same comfort that you've been comforted with.

I'm also really thanking the Lord for my co–workers, Abi & Dust, & I was really thankful for the counsel that you gave us, for them to be faithful to share things with me, because I truly desire it. I thought it was really sweet, & I even had to laugh about that part of your Letter where you say to Abi & Dust, "Juan really likes having things pointed out to him, he really appreciates correction." In a way I felt kind of like, "Is that you‚ John?—Do I like that?" And then I had to think about it & I thought to myself, "Well, if Mama thinks I like it, I do like it!"—Ha!

I also apologised to sweet Abi for taking some of her ideas without acknowledging that they were hers! Lord help me! I guess some of her ideas are so wild or unexpected that I tend to think it's me, ha! But praise the Lord, Abi is really coming up with a lot of good ideas, & I really appreciate the counsel you gave us, sweet Mama, that she needs to correct me in that area.—Because if it's a habit that I've acquired through the years, I want to change it, & I want to give credit to whom credit is due.—Credit to the Lord first of all, & then credit to those to whom He gives the ideas.

I guess it's a case of learning, learning, it never ends! And I truly do love it, sweet Mama, because the way you bring things up to us, you just speak so much faith. Truly I don't feel deserving of your love & faith! I just really can't understand it & I know it's from the Lord. TYJ!

I just want to give the Lord all the credit for changing me. And I thank the Lord for your prayers & the prayers of all those who are praying for me, as I'm sure their prayers avail much in helping to change somebody as hard-headed & independent as me, who has had the "preacher's itch" weakness of talking as strongly as I did!—To change that habit that I may become more of a hearer & a listener to other people's ideas, & to learn to pump people power, which will inspire them to do better for the Lord, just like you have done with me. I pray I'll follow that same sample with others & allow them that freedom to express themselves.

I'm learning that in a way I sort of prided myself in being a "prayer warrior," & I now see that a lot of it was praying in my own strength, praying by myself—which of course did help me to make "a thousand flee." But I'm learning now to submit myself to God by submitting myself to others & asking for their prayers too. —Like when I'm feeling discouraged, instead of just me personally rebuking the Devil & rebuking discouragement & hoping to get a victory—which, in a way‚ the Lord does give because it makes a thousand flee—as I ask for prayer from others, then we are able to make ten thousand flee, which is making my prayer life even ten times more effective!

I'd also like to react to the comment that was made about some of us Latins mistakenly being called "on fire for the Lord" because of our being boisterous & overpowering, instead of learning how to yield & submit more to the Lord & letting the Lord burn through us. I'll admit that, in a way, we have been too nationalistic, too Latin, which of course is now being exposed, & by God's grace being changed. Because we don't want to just be Latins, we want to be Kingdomites!

More & more I am seeing the influence that we as leaders have on the flock, & God help me, I just really need His help & your prayers, because I want to become a better Shepherd & a better sample of what a true Shepherd & a true leader in this Family should be like!

How can I express how touched I was by reading Chris' & Dust's & Abi's reactions. Again, I thank the Lord for the Family, for my brothers' & sisters' love for me. I feel really loved, & as the quote says, "To be loved is one of the greatest gifts anybody could desire." I sure feel like the Lord's blessed me with a great gift to have such love from my brothers & sisters. Again, when reading the sweet & encouraging things that they said, I sort of felt like, "Is that you, Juan?", because I don't feel worthy of such words of recognition & even praise. I feel like a real publican, like a real sinner saved only by the mercies of the Lord. I know that I'm here just because of His Love & mercy & not by any works of righteousness that I have done.

Here, sweet Mama, I'd like to repeat something I've said before, because I really feel it in my heart: I've always felt like I'm just a steward in my King & Queen's Kingdom, & I just really pray that whenever you feel that the time has come that there needs to be a change‚ please know that my heart's desire is just to please you & to do what you feel is best for the sake of the Kingdom. I do really love this field & the people here, & it really hurts my heart to see how my bad sample has caused many of my own personal weaknesses to hinder or negatively affect others' lives.

So if my stepping aside would help people to grow & to prosper & to get to know Dad & you in a better way, then that's the desire of my heart.—That the people will get to know you both in the same way that I've been so blessed to feel & know you & the Lord's Love in my own life. That's what I desire for everybody else, because I've really seen the fruits of it in my life.—And I want others to receive more of that same thing that I've been so blessed to receive. TYJ!

The number of souls won here in Latin America has decreased in the recent stats, but this is understandable because of the fact that we are no longer doing so much street witnessing, which is usually where people were getting a lot of souls. We're concentrating more on the few, taking more time to get out Videos & follow-up & feed people‚ which of course decreases our time on the streets & number of souls won. But PTL, in the near future, as the fruits of training take effect, we are not going to be just harvesting with each man using a scythe, but we'll be able to use one of those big harvester combines, & I believe, D.V., that our over all fruit in every area of outreach is going to be much much greater than before!

Truly I don't see anything but good coming out of this training vision, & I thank the Lord & you for having the faith that the Lord will effect these changes & that I can be a part of this great move that the Lord is doing in the Continent right now!

The Lord is blessing us with real unity. My relationship with Abi & Dust seems to be going very well. I really enjoy being with them & I really appreciate them. I was just telling Abi the other day how much of a friend she's become to me. I really trust her & I share my heart with her in a way that I haven't done with other people before. She's sort of become my best friend! I don't know how else to explain it, but she's somebody that I really enjoy being with & sharing things with, & she's very honest with me, which really makes me enjoy our relationship even more!

Thank you again for the beautiful words of love, encouragement‚ inspiration & instruction that you've sent our way! It's so true what you said about correction not needing to be harsh.—Because through these pages that I've been reading in your Letter‚ Mama, I haven't felt any harshness, but only love & mercy & understanding, which then makes me feel like a son because I'm receiving the correction. Thank you so very much for taking the time to listen to our tapes & to answer our questions. I really feel loved, & most of all I'm thankful because I know that Latin America will receive the guidance & leading that it needs so as to become closer followers of the Words of David. The people here will be much happier & fulfilled‚ & by God's grace, we're going to bear more fruit than ever before!

I hope that our appreciation will not just be in words, but that we will be able to bring forth fruit meet for repentance, in Jesus' name! By His grace & through His Spirit He's going to do it, & we know it, & we thank the Lord for it. I love you, sweet Mama, & of course, keep you always in my prayers, as well as dear Dad. I'm so thankful for him. Please let him know that his children all around the Continent really love him. Please receive lots of love from your son.—Juan


ILYSVM & am so thankful for you & for all the loving guidance, counsel‚ direction‚ support & encouragement you've been sending this way. It really does mean a lot to us, & I know I personally am very thankful to be a part of such an exciting Work. It's just thrilling to see the Lord moving so mightily!

Some parts of your Letter seemed to hit Juan quite hard, but God bless him, he's such a sample of a fighter! As soon as we all finished reading over it, he asked Dust & I if we could pray for him. He really wanted to be open to what the Lord was trying to teach him & not justify anything in his own mind. GBH for just hitting it head-on.

As I've mentioned before, Mommy, Juan really is a sample to me, & I guess when I saw him ask for prayer I saw the importance of me praying more for him. This sweet confession from Juan when he asked us to pray for him really helped me to get on the attack & see where my place is, how I need to be a prayer warrior & support from behind the scenes for him. In another talk we had, Juan explained to me that he is quite proud & has a hard time expressing his love & thanks to others‚ but he wanted me to know how thankful he was for me, how he enjoyed living with me & how I was a real friend to him.

This, of course, meant a lot to me. I really do love Juan & I agree with you that he's very very sweet, precious, dedicated, loyal, faithful...I can't even think of all the adjectives to describe him! But what you say is true, & I really do want to love & support & encourage him & be a blessing in whatever way I can. I want to keep communicating with him & keep praying behind the scenes & keep loving him, as I do know he is the man for the job!

He's got it, Mama!—And he's changing, it's just really beautiful to see! He's a real sample & one that I know all of South America is going to look to. It really is your faith, Mama, that's pulling him through, he's said that time & time again. He really loves you a whole lot & I know he doesn't want to fail you, & won't! Each thing that comes his way, he takes it! He's a fighter & he's a good sample.

As far as your prayers for our teamwork, the Lord seems to really be answering & drawing us all closer together each day. I believe things are being more defined within our teamwork & I believe Dust is feeling more needed & included. The Lord seems to really be blessing this teamwork & we're all working very well together. I really want to thank you for all the beautiful, wise, Godly counsel you gave us about working together‚ all the little tips & guidance, which I really value.

Mommy‚ it was so sweet how you explained that we are all sinners, which as you mentioned, helps us to have greater compassion on others. Your encouragement about training & how it takes time‚ & how I shouldn't get discouraged really helped! I know this‚ but often in the midst of the battle it's so easy to slip & lose the faith & patience that's needed, so that little reminder was a real help & blessing.

It's really beautiful how the Lord has given Juan & me such different qualities or callings‚ & to see how together with Dust we really can form the team that the Lord wants. In the past‚ Mommy, I always wanted to be everything‚ but I think I'm seeing more & more clearly as time goes on that you just have to play the role or part that the Lord has given you, no matter what it is.

I see the anointing that Juan has & I know that I don't have that in me, but it's fulfilling just knowing that I can back him up in prayer. Mommy, it's wonderful to just sit here & realise what the Lord has done in my life, things that were so difficult for me in the past are now so much easier. He really has changed my heart in a lot of ways.

I'm just so thankful for this opportunity to be with Juan as I think I've really grown a lot in the time that I've been with him. He's really directed me towards the Word, he's helped me to cling to it more, & I see that that's what gives me much more of a burden to get closer to the Lord, to get closer to the Word.

The principle you brought out about comparing ourselves favourably with others who are much worse off than we are & how we need to count our blessings was so beautiful. Actually, I was flipped when I read that this Letter might possibly come out in printed form for all, as it has such beautiful principles in it. It really fed me & helped me & I know it could do that for others.

I also feel that the beautiful & sweet & encouraging words that you spoke about Juan & his leadership would be a real blessing, help & encouragement to the field. No one could say it as sweetly as you or Dad, & I think it will be a blessing for the field here in Latin America to see & know & read what you & Dad feel about Juan & the faith that you have in him. It's so true‚ Mommy, what you said, about Juan being a real sample of having a positive attitude. That's something I've really learned from him. When you say how proud you are of Juan, it makes me want to put my "Amen, me too!" right beside it!

It was also a real blessing that Chris was able to meet with the North American leadership. I know in some ways it was a bit of a trial for Juan at first. But then when your words of love & encouragement came, explaining that we hadn't done anything wrong, that Chris was just going to build on the meetings we'd had with them, that helped to pick Juan up. And from all that he read regarding the meetings, he seems real happy & pleased with the outcome.

I think it really touched Juan to hear everyone's sweet comments about him. It was really sweet of you to share some of Chris' reports with Juan, as I think it was a real encouragement, help & support for him. I also agree with you & believe that the Lord is going to help Juan overcome some of these weaknesses in his sample, & he is going to catch up, because he's got what it takes!

I think the most priceless thing for the Latins right now is to see their top Latin leader take & make these changes & become what he needs to! That will speak even louder than having us coming in from the outside & sharing our own sample or way of doing things. I think it is causing much more of an effect to see Juan as a national right out there doing it & going through these changes with them. Lord help me to really support him in prayer, love & encouragement! Every place where you are encouraging Juan, I can put an "Amen" behind it, as I know the Lord has used him tremendously. I'm glad that others are going to be able to hear your words & your faith & confidence in him. PTL!

ILY & appreciate you so much! Love always, Abi


To begin with, I'd like to thank you so much for your mercy & your forgiveness for my sins & failings that I confessed to you. It is funny how it works, Mama‚ that no matter how bad a thing I've done‚ you would still rather hear about it, & love me more for confessing it than if I didn't tell you about it. It certainly helps me to realise & appreciate the fact that I'm only here by God's mercy, & not because I'm such a wonderful fellow or such a hot–shot leader!

Mama‚ I very much agree with what you said about Juan, & his being able to carry on here alone for so many years & staying pretty much on the right track spiritually & in tune with the Lord.—Whereas I've proven over the past couple of years that I can hardly be trusted to make a little side trip or visa trip without getting into all kinds of trouble! I am very thankful to be together with Juan & Abi, & to know that they can guard me & help me in my weak areas. Actually, Mama‚ these last couple of months I feel that you've gently taken my hand & led me on to some very important & precious victories over two major weak areas in my life: Drinking & being overweight.

I'm reminded of a Scripture that Chris brought up from time–to–time at the Summit Meetings, Psalm 18:35: "And thy gentleness hath made me great." And the next verses, 36 & 37 say, "Thou hast enlarged my steps under me that my feet did not slip. And I have pursued my enemies & overtaken them." These monsters of alcoholism & overeating have been my enemies over the years, & up until now I just haven't been able to get a victory over them as much as I would have liked to. And now I'm so thankful, Mama‚ that you're helping me to gain victories over both of these, & to not be the man that I am, but to be the man that the Lord wants me to be, & the man that I've always wanted to be. PTL!

Thank you also, Mama & Peter, for the restriction that you have placed upon me about not touching any alcohol at all. Please don't think that I'm murmuring about it or chafing about it. I'm actually thankful for this restriction & I know that it's what I need, & I really have the hope & the faith to keep it. Actually, it's the one sure-fire way to defeat the Enemy in this area when he points his finger at me & accuses me of being a drunk & an alcoholic. I can fight right back & say, "Well, maybe I was, but I don't drink any more, so it doesn't matter!"

When I think about all the different times that I've drunk too much, I can't think of any good fruit whatsoever that's come from it. As a matter of fact, on the contrary, the fruit of it has been pain & suffering. Drinking like that also really takes away from getting in the Word. The different times that I sat around drinking, I could have spent drinking in the Word, getting closer to Jesus & strengthening my relationship with Him.

I've pretty much settled it in my heart & am fully determined to not ever drink again. I feel that your mercy & your love & conviction & your sample, by the Lord's wisdom, have grabbed ahold of my life & have taken me by the hand & are gently leading me to these victories. I'm very very happy & I'm very very thankful to you & Dad!

I'm really praying for Juan & I want to do everything that I can to support him through the course that the Lord is taking him right now. The other evening Juan was giving a talk to the teens & the adults at a united meeting, acknowledging his mistakes & shortcomings as the leader of the Latin American Work, which he seems to do on almost every available occasion. And he looked so weak & so frail & so broken to me.

I think it's marvellous how, as you said, Mama, the Lord is trusting him with more all the time, & gently leading him to see where he has made mistakes as a leader; or perhaps not even mistakes so much as showing that some of his operating procedures as a leader are in need of change. Juan is certainly proving that he can take it! My heart really goes out to him during this time!

Here I am grappling with my little problems of drinking & overweight while dear sweet Juan is going through these tremendous spiritual battles & winning monumental victories. I think that in much the same way that the Lord & you have taken ahold of my life & very sweetly & lovingly led me on to some victories that I otherwise couldn't even come close to getting‚ in the same manner you & the Lord are doing that with Juan's life in leading him step by step, ever so lovingly & gently, exposing one area that needs change & correction‚ & then another area.

I believe that the Lord is leading Juan to a much larger room than he's ever been in before in his life. It reminds me of King David‚ how he had made those mistakes with Bathsheba, & later with numbering Israel‚ which displeased the Lord, & how the Lord dealt with David about it & talked to him about it‚ & yet the Lord still called David a man after His Own heart. My feeling is that that's how the Lord sees Juan, as being a man after God's Own heart. So the Lord is taking Juan through this course, correcting his life & his leadership‚ while at the same time loving & encouraging him—especially through your words & your counsel, Mama.

Juan has frequently told me & Abi, too, that he knows that you & Dad love him & that it's your love & mercy & the faith that you have in him that keeps him going! So it seems to me that the Lord is taking him through a very special course in his life, at the end of which he'll be a much stronger, more understanding & more versatile leader, & a much better-trained leader as well. In a way, I would say that Juan is getting a crash course in just a few months' time that it's taken others several years to go through. And I think you're right, Mama, that Juan has it within him to catch up quickly!

By the way, I don't mind sharing the lessons that I learned about the mistakes that I made while in Scandinavia with the Family. I know for a fact that drinking & alcoholism still remain a problem with some in the Family, although one that has been concealed a lot because people are so ashamed of it & ashamed of themselves for having that problem. Of course, the Enemy really fights getting it out in the open because he knows that's where he'll be defeated. I too‚ Mama, admire Faithy for her courage in confessing her problem along these lines. I feel like she's paved the way & made it easier for me.

I hope that sharing my mistakes & problems as well as the lessons I learned will also help the Family & be another voice in encouraging them to fight for the victory, because alcoholism really is a devastating device of the Enemy that can bring down otherwise useful & talented individuals.

I love you so very much & I thank you for everything! Thank you especially, Mama, for the beautiful & wise counsel that you sent us in your beautiful Letters. Dad & you & the Lord are certainly shining your loving spotlight on Latin America. That's all for now! Much, much love! Bye!—Dust.


Letter #1, GN 434:


2The danger of being in too comfortable & familiar surroundings!

3Needed changes must be enacted drastically!

4Making the break with the old!—Like when we first joined!

4"Now is the day of salvation!"

4Familiarity's resistance to change!

5Accepting the challenge to change!

6Go ahead & deliver the message!

6Jo's lessons about becoming more prayerful!

7"Summit '90" FSMs coming!

7Delegates' meetings & counsel to Juan about his video to Latin America!

9The "Family way"!

9Correction: Loving, gentle & fulfilling!

10One person can't do everything!

10Juan's accomplishments

10Sensitivity: How to fight it!

11Note taking & good reporting

11How to keep a good working relationship!

11Personal comments to Juan & Abi

11Speaking up!

11Shipping out change-resisters!

12The hindering power of unyieldedness!

12Teens need supervision!

12Closing words

12New KIDz Mag & GP Video series in the works!

Letter #2, Part I, GN 437:

1The sacrifice of communication!

2Avoiding distracting romantic involvements‚ & being a tight united team!

2Don't let sensitivity cause you to withhold things from each other!

2Personal words to Dust regarding his mistake

3Some thoughts on why Dust made his mistake

3We wouldn't fire you for your mistakes!

4Mistakes give you greater compassion on those you work with!

4Keep fighting!—And patiently training others!

5Honestly explaining things to others, even when it's difficult!

5The reassurance of having others agree with our decisions!

5Finding a balance between teaching the spiritual & practical aspects of things!

6Policy for alcohol problems!

7The "Count Your Blessings" game!

8Yieldedness enables us to pass tests & grow!

8Confessing weaknesses & asking for prayer

8Meetings: Plan ahead!

9Leaders doing less talking & more listening!

9Don't worry about your mistakes!

9Faithfulness in little things!

9Stopping to take time with the Lord!

9Open & honest communication with teamworkers!

10Loving & appreciating each other!

10The difference between constructive & destructive criticism!

10It's okay to go slow!

11Obedience is not selective!

11Pros & cons to having animals!

11Nationals not staying in parents' cities!

11A lot to be encouraged about!

11De-emphasis on teen marriage!

11Mario Vargas Llosa

11Chris' meetings with N.A. Leadership

12Break-ins & robberies!

12"On fire," or nationalistic nationals?

13TV temptations!

13Chris' reactions about Juan

15"Create in me a clean heart..."—Psa.51:10.

16Juan's role in Latin America!

Letter #2, Part II, GN 438:

1Zeroing-in on training!

1Juan's progress!

2Lessons Mama is learning!

2Dream about Praise & Jonathan

2Mistakes have been made by all leadership!

3Abi's high regard for Juan

3Speaking in English

3Good samples of taking changes!

3Teamworkers relaxing together!

3Taking time for R&R!

3Keeping each other informed!

3Some quotes from Dust

4Video presentation to the Latin Family

4Abi's warning about the results of resisting change!

5Dust's video contribution

5Juan's video apology

6Summit '90 meeting notes & Mama's new Prayer Jewels & Letters!

6The "pastor & evangelist" parallel!

6P.S. Getting things out in the open

7"It is good to be humbled!"

8For Abi

8Regarding trained personnel

8Dust's weight loss & restrictions!

8Lesson about being "number one"!

8Just trust the Lord you're in the right place!

9Leadership separations!

9The more you fight, the stronger you become!

9Excerpts of reactions from Juan, Abi & Dust!