David Berg
—MOApril 1‚ 1973GP No.237
P.O. Box 31, London WC2E 7LX, England or GPO Box 3141, San Juan, Puerto Rico 00936
1. WHERE WOULD WE BE WITHOUT HOLES? Where would people be without seven holes in their heads? (Count'em!)—And actually, you've got lots more holes than that, because every little pore in your skin is a hole! If it weren't for your seven holes you couldn't eat or taste or smell or hear or see or even breathe! And without those little pores, your skin couldn't breathe and it couldn't sweat and you wouldn't have any hair, 'cause every little hair grows in a hole called a follicle.
2. HOLES ARE ALMOST AN ENDLESS SUBJECT BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY OF THEM! It seems like everything is composed of holes. Your whole body is full of holes. Your blood vessels are holes, and your lungs are holes, and your heart's got big holes in it for the blood to flow in and out. Wow!—there are so many important holes! Your navel is a hole without which you wouldn't have been able to be a baby. And each bosom of your mother is a hole, without which the baby couldn't get any milk.
3. YOU'RE REALLY FULL OF HOLES! You couldn't have much fun if you weren't full of holes. And your Daddy, he was full of holes, too, from the top of his head to the soles of his feet! Even your fingernails grow in holes!
4. IT'S REALLY TOO BIG A SUBJECT, BECAUSE THE WHOLE WORLD IS SO FULL OF HOLES! 'Cause if it weren't for holes, nobody could even live!—There wouldn't be any pretty trees and flowers and vegetables and fruits—'cause they all grow in holes and they're full of holes! And the sap in the trees flows through holes, and the juice in the leaves flows through holes, and almost everything is made of holes—mostly holes with just a little bit of something around them. It's true!
5. SO YOU SHOULD NEVER FEEL BAD IF YOU FEEL LIKE NOTHING or a big zero or just a plain hole—'cause the world is full of holes, and there wouldn't be any world if it weren't for holes! Just think, if it weren't for a hole, a 10 would only be a 1. And if you think a hole is really nothing‚ it really isn't so, because if you add another hole or zero, it makes the one a 100! And if you add another zero hole‚ it makes it a thousand! And you just add three more holes, and it makes a million! So just a little old one can be a whole million if you just add six holes--six nothings—six zeros—'cause a zero's nothing but a hole with a line around it! But it takes lots of zeros to make millions!
6. ALL CIRCLES ARE HOLES, and the whole world is made of circles called atoms made of more circles called neutrons, electrons and protons which are nothing but electricity‚ and nobody knows what electricity is but God! 'Cause nobody's ever seen it‚ and they don't even know what it looks like because it's invisible! All you can do is feel it and know what it does, because it's just plain energy—nothing—nothing that's something! But it makes the electrons, neutrons and protons go 'round and make an atom‚ and you take three of those little circles or holes and put them together you've got a molecule—a little pyramid!—(Try it!) All molecules are made of these little round atoms which make little pyramids called molecules, and everything in the world is made of these circular pyramids—pyramids made of circles or little holes of energy!—Holes full of energy!—
7. THE WHOLE WORLD IS A GREAT BIG BALL OF HOLES, all the way from the tiniest little atom to Mammoth Cave and Grand Canyon! In fact‚ the Earth is a hollow sphere full of fire—a bottomless pit‚ or huge round hole, and every now and then the fire comes out through holes called volcanoes! That's right! And all the seas are great big holes in the ground full of water, and all the lakes and the springs and the wells are holes too! We get almost all of our water out of holes, unless you catch it in a rain barrel which is also a big hole! And we get coal out of holes in the ground called mines, and diamonds and jewels and all kinds of minerals, like gold and silver and copper and iron and tin, and all these useful and valuable things which we wouldn't have if it weren't for holes!—And all of them are made of crystals, which are pyramids of molecules made of holes‚ or spheres of atoms—hollow balls of energy—and each ball is just a hole surrounded by a sphere! In fact, they're mostly hole—they're mostly nothing!
8. IN FACT, ALMOST EVERYTHING is mostly made up of nothing!—You know that? In fact everything is more nothing than anything! Like the whole universe is mostly space, mostly nothing, but a great big hole full of nothing, except for few tiny little particles called planets and stars, suns and moons and thing like that! But they're very, very small tiny thins compared to all that nothing—all that nothing called space, which is great, great, great big, big, big hole—so big we don't even know where it all ends!—So much nothing!
9. SO YOU SEE THERE IS MORE NOTHINGS THAN EVERYTHING and everything's made mostly out of nothing! So don't feel too bad if you feel like nothing, 'cause nothing is almost everything, and there wouldn't be anything without nothing, God says He even hung the world on nothing! In fact, He says He made it out of nothing, and He calls things that are not as though they were!—"Are not" means nothing. So God makes the nothing somethings out of nothing so they can be anything if they just have God to make them something! That's right!—You know that?
10. IN FACT, WITH GOD‚ NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE! If you can believe in God, everything is possible, because He makes everything out of nothing—even you and me! We're nothing, and We're impossible except for God, and He takes our nothing and makes it something so it can be anything with God! Because nothings aren't anything without God, 'cause He's like the Circle around the nothing that makes it something.—With God all around you‚ even your nothing can be something.—In fact, you can be almost anything‚ 'cause God makes everything out of nothing—nothing surrounded by Him!
11. SO THE NEXT TIME YOU SEE A HOLE‚ REMEMBER IT WOULDN'T EVEN BE A HOLE IF THERE WASN'T SOMETHING AROUND IT.—It would just be nothing. And remember that you are just like that hole! If you don't have God around you, you're not going to be anything!—You're just going to be absolutely nothing—not even a hole!—'Cause even a hole can't be anything at all—it can't even be a hole without something around it that makes it a hole. But if nothing has something around it, it can at least be a hole! And as you can see, holes are very important and useful. There wouldn't be anything without holes!
12. SO IF YOU'RE NOTHING, JUST SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GOD'S SOMETHING and you can became a very useful and important little hole—nothing surrounded by God, out of which He made everything. So you could even be anything if you're a good hole—a nothing that's got God around it! 'Cause God makes something out of nothing, so it can be anything. 'Cause He made everything our of nothing, just like you and me!
13. THERE'S NO END TO NOTHING. There's always an end to something, but there's never an end to nothing! So if you'll just be nothing‚ you can even be bigger than something! And the more nothing something is—the more full of holes it is—so the more holy it is!
14. NOW, HOW DID I GET TO THINKING ABOUT HOLES ANYWAY?—It must have been be Holy Spirit! I get lots of fun out of nothing! I was always thinking about thinks like this when I was a little boy: That must what they called "philosophizing"! So I guess I was a child philosopher.—Ha!
15. THE POET EMILY DICKINSON ONCE WROTE:
"I'M NOBODY!—WHO ARE YOU?—
Are you nobody too?
Then there is a pair of us!—
They'd banish us if they knew!
How dreary to be somebody!—
How public like a frog!—
To tell your name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!"
16. ALL THE BIG SOMEBODIES WOULDN'T BE ANYBODY IF IT WEREN'T FOR US NOBODIES!—All the people that think they're something wouldn't be anything if it weren't for us nothings! That's a big, big truth in a little tiny hole! It's a great big something in a little tiny nothing that came out of a hole in my head! I've also got a hole in my tummy and I'm hungry! I've got a big hole of nothing that needs something.—You got anything to fill my nothing to make it something?
17. I MUST HAVE SOME LITTLE CHILDISH HELPERS! There must be some little children in Heaven. That must be why I get so childish some times.—Maybe that's why people get senile before they die, so they can become a little child to get into Heaven!
18. WHAT IS A HOUSE BUT A HOLE THAT YOU LIVE IN?—And if your house didn't have holes there wouldn't be any windows, you couldn't look out and let the light and the air in. It would be all dark! There wouldn't be any taps for water‚ and you'd get awful thirsty! And there couldn't be any sink or toilet, so you couldn't even go to the toilet or wash the dishes! How many holes can you think of that are useful holes?
19. THERE COULDN'T BE ANY STOVES TO COOK THE FOOD, 'cause the gas goes through little pipes with holes in them! Or if you have electricity instead‚ even the electrical wire is like a hole for the electricity to get through. And worst of all, the house wouldn't even have a door, so you couldn't get into it in the first place, or if you were inside, you couldn't get out!
20. AND YOU KNOW WHAT?—JESUS EVEN CALLED HIMSELF A HOLE: The Door! He said behold! (—That means open your two eyes, your two holes, and look!—Use those two holes in the front of your head!—Behold! Open them wide and look at what He's saying!) Behold! I am the Door!—I am the Hole you gotta get through to get into My House, and I am the only Hole you can get through‚ and there isn't any other hole you can go through and get in but by Me! Have you entered Jesus' house through Him, the Hole, the only Door?
21. AND YOU KNOW WHAT LOVE IS?—It's a hole that needs to be filled!—Plus something to fill it with!—Like you and me and Jesus! There are square holes and round holes all kinds of holes, and it takes all kinds of pegs to fill'em! So whatever kind of peg you are, there's a hole somewhere where you'll fit.—And no matter what kind of hole you are, God's got you pegged! 'Cause everybody can understand holes, and everybody knows that holes are nothing without something in them, 'cause all holes are made for something. All holes are nothing made for something. So if you're a hole and you feel like nothing, there's something for you somewhere!—no matter if you're round or square: —Now matter if you're a rounder or a square! 'Cause a hole is nothing without something. Amen?
22. ARE YOU A HOLE?—Then God's got something for you! Folks that aren't holes can't have anything, 'cause they already think they're something when they are really nothing! It says: "He has satisfied the hungry heart, but the rich He has sent empty away!" So be glad you're a hole, 'cause if you're nothing, you can have God's something! It's true!—And you can be anything if you're a hole! But if you think you're something you can't be nothing, 'cause God can't give you anything. So thank God you're a hole, 'cause God can make something out of nothing so it can be anything!—But He can't make nothing out of something, 'cause He likes to make something out of nothing! Because if something is anything, it can't be nothing, and He can't fill it with everything 'cause it thinks it's already something! So be glad you're a hole, so God can make something out of nothing and fill you up and make you anything! God can fill your nothing with something so you can do anything, 'cause you're a hole! God must like holes, He made so many of them!—And He likes to fill them all!
23. YOU KNOW WHAT SCIENTISTS SAY?—"Nature abhors a vacuum!"—But you know what I say?—God loves holes, and He made lots of holes so He could fill 'em up! So if you're a hole, God can fill you up! 'Cause if you're nothing, you can be full of something. 'Cause if you were something you couldn't be full of nothing. So be glad you're a hole! You see, if a hole is so full already, God can't shove anything into it, and everything falls out when He tries to put something in it, 'cause it's already so full of something that it can't hold anything anymore! 'Cause you gotta be a hole to hold something, 'cause only holes can hold. If you're not a hole you can't hold or behold or have the Holy Spirit, and you missed the whole thing! 'Cause you gotta be a hole to have anything, 'cause you can't be something without nothing. 'Cause you gotta be a hole to be filled 'cause who ever heard of trying to fill anything up but a hole? 'Cause you can't fill a thing that's already full of something 'cause you gotta be full of nothing in order to be filled with anything.—Ain't that something!
24. WHEN I WAS IN THE ARMY THEY MADE ME DIG HOLES AND FILL 'EM UP AGAIN just to keep me busy and to show me how important holes are! 'Cause first you gotta make a hole before you can fill it up—just like God!—He's gotta make you a hole before He can fill you up! He's gotta make you a nothing so He can fill you up with something. So if you try your best to be nothing you're bound to be filled with something, and God can fill you with anything if you're a hole!
25. THERE ARE SO MANY IMPORTANT HOLES IN LIFE I couldn't even begin to tell you about them all! So why don't you think of some, and tell your teacher all about holes? 'Cause there's something about a hole, or it wouldn't be nuthin'! This is just a little talk about little holes. I guess this is a P.S. to holes—You know what a P.S. is?—It's another hole 'cause when you fill up one you have to make another one, so you can put some more in it! That's why God has to keep digging holes so He can keep filling them up with something, or else they wouldn't be anything, 'cause you can't be nothing without being a hole! But if you're a hole at least you're something that can be full of anything, 'cause you're nothing but a hole! And God wants to fill you up with something or else you won't be anything, and you won't be nothing if you think you're something, 'cause you can't be a hole if you're anything‚ 'cause you gotta be nothing' to be a hole. But if you're a hole you can be the hole thing—God's thing! Are you a good hole full of nothing?—Then God can fill you with something and make you a very happy hole full of anything God wants to fill you with! OK?
26. NOW LET'S SING: "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY!" It's a very holy song, 'cause you gotta be full of holes to be holy—Right? You gotta be nothing to be something. So please be one of God's little holes‚ will you‚ so He can fill you with something. OK? Let's sing it again, OK?—"Holy, holy, holy!"—And I hope your hole gets the point, OK? (If you make love, it will!) "Holy‚ holy, holy!—Lord God Almighty!" Did you know god is very holy?—So let's be holy too, OK?—If you're unholy, it's 'cause you're not holey enough! Are you a hole?—OK, then you're holy! So let's all be holes and holy, and then we'll all be holy holes! What ho, holy holes? I'm a whole holy hole for His Holiness—Jesus!—What are you?
27. 'CAUSE YOU CAN'T RUN OUT OF NUTHIN' IF YOU AIN'T GOT SOMETHIN', and you can't run out of somethin' if you ain't got nuthin! And you can't be anything unless you want the whole thing—God's whole thing.—Are you God's whole thing?—Are you one of God's holes full of nothing so He can fill you with something? Let's all be holy holes for His Holiness—Jesus!—Amen? "Holy, holy, holy!—Lord God Almighty!" See‚ you can't have God unless you're holy—You gotta be a hole to get God. Are you a hole? OK, so let's be holy holes for his Holiness—Jesus!—Amen? An "Amen" is a hole full of praise for a holeful of Jesus‚ and that's the whole idea!
28. ISN'T GOD FUNNY!—HE'S ALL FULL OF HOLES LIKE YOU AND ME! That's why He's so holy! "Holy‚ holy, holy!—Lord God Almighty!"—We sing that old song about God.—But when we sing about ourselves, we could sing another old song: "Oh, I got plenty of nuthin', and nuthin's plenty for me!" Hallelujah!—And all the little "Holy Holes for Jesus" said: "Amen!"—'Cause if you got plenty of nuthin', nuthin's plenty for you filled with Jesus!—Amen?—Are you a Holy Hole full of Jesus?—Holelujah!—HOLE-LELUJAH!—Get it? That's a HOLE lotta praise to God!---A whole hole soul fulla hole-souled praise!—Amen? HOLE-lelujah!—Are you a hole fulla praise?—Are you a whole soul holeful of Jesus?—HOLE-lujah!
29. (I'd just finished "Holy Holes" and was taking a little nap when this song woke me out of a sound sleep!—Sounds like Aaron!)
Are you a whole holy hole
With a whole holey soul
That sings holy holelujahs—To Jesus?
If you're a whole holy hole
With a whole holey soul
Singing holy holelujahs—For Jesus,
Then you're a whole holy hole
With a whole holy soul
Singing holy holelujahs—To Jesus!
And you're a jolly ol' soul
Like ol' King Cole
With a holey whole soul—For Jesus!
And you love holy whole souls
With His Holiness' holes
Full of holy whole holes—For Jesus!
'Cause your mouth is a hole
To sing with all your soul
With the holy whole holes—For Jesus!
And your eye is a hole
And your ear is a hole
And your nose is a hole—For Jesus!
And you'll use all of these holes
With all the holy holes
With all of your soul—For Jesus!
So let those holelujahs roll
With all of your soul
For all the holy holes—For Jesus!
For you'll have more than you can hold
Worth more than all the world's gold
And you'll never grow old—With Jesus!
And you'll be oh so bold
With a story that is told
And never grows old—About Jesus!