—Psalm 91:5.—The Enemy's Terrorism!—By Father DavidDO857January 1980
1. (MARIA: THIS IS JANUARY 10TH, & DURING THE NIGHT, Well, actually about 8 o'clock in the morning, I woke up to hear David whispering something, & as I listened closely, he was whispering the 23rd Psalm in the darkness!
2. (SO I TURNED OVER & CUDDLED UP TO HIM & put my hand on him‚ as I realised he was going through a tremendous battle! I was really thankful that I had waked, for he said:)
3. I'VE BEEN HAVING SUCH BATTLES ALL NIGHT LONG! I don't understand it. I'm fine during the day, & I don't have these battles then at all. But the Devil just terrifies me sometimes at night—And I'm getting worse, not better. (Maria: How are you getting worse?) These cramps in my chest!: I have them so much now, & I was having these dreams all night about being out of my body & looking down on all our activities. (Maria: So I quoted him the verse:
4. ("FEAR THOU NOT, FOR I AM WITH THEE: Be not dismayed, for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee‚ yea I will help thee, yea I will uphold thee with the right hand of My righteousness.") (Isa.41:10.) That's my verse!—That's the main verse my Mother got for me!
5. BUT HOW CAN I HAVE THE GIFT OF FAITH WHEN MY MAIN BATTLE IS FEAR IN THE NIGHT? Sometimes I'm so terrified I could sit up & scream, but I don't want to wake everybody up! But when you wake up & pray for me, I just stop worrying & cast my burden on you & the Lord, & then we go to sleep. If you're holding the lifeline, then I won't die—at least not right now.—And then it's safe for me to go to sleep. (Maria: Then I quoted him:
6. ("ONE CAN CHASE A THOUSAND, BUT TWO CAN PUT TEN THOUSAND TO FLIGHT!" [Deut.32:30]) I don't know why it is, but as soon as you wake up I get real sleepy & not worried anymore. I guess the Devil flees when he sees the weakest saint upon his knees!—That'd make a good song! (Maria: Well, I am certainly weak, that's for sure!) When you're weak, then you're strong, for His strength is made perfect in your weakness. (2Cor.12:9,10.) So when I'm weak, then you're strong.
7. WHEN THE ENEMY COMES IN LIKE A FLOOD (Isa.59:19)‚ it seems I have to have you to raise up the standard against him for me. I pray, I quote Scriptures, I sometimes fight all night, but I seldom get the victory until you wake up.—Why can't I do it alone? I cannot make it alone!
8. HERE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE A PROPHET & STRONG‚ BUT I'M SO WEAK! It was like a big stone was crushing me, but the minute you woke up, it all fled! When you wake up & start praying for me, the darkness flees! Why won't it go when I pray? I never can relax like this until you wake up.
9. IT'S LIKE A PILOT AT THE SHIP'S WHEEL FIGHTING THE STORM ALL NIGHT! But when you wake up I can just give it over to you & go to sleep!—Why is that? I ought to be able to be great & strong & be able to fight my battles all alone. I even thought about calling some of the other girls to pray for me, but I didn't want to wake them up—or wake you up.—And then I heard Techi stir & cry in her sleep.
10. I THINK TECHI REALLY WAKES UP & PRAYS FOR ME LOTS OF TIMES when she cries in the night. She knows that I'm going through battles. Isn't that strange? It seems like my darkest hour is just before dawn! I have my biggest battles then. I can hardly wait for the daybreak. There must be something in that—like the vampires & witches: They like darkness because their deeds are evil!
11. I HAVE SUCH BATTLES IN THE DARKNESS but as soon as I see the light coming through the shutters, I get real sleepy & go to sleep—especially if you're praying for me. It's amazing! I can just heave great sighs of relief. Until then, sometimes it just seems like I'm tied in knots—my insides, my mind, my body, everything—just seems tied in knots.
12. BUT THE MINUTE YOU WAKE UP‚ I KNOW EVERYTHING IS ALL RIGHT because I know the Lord always answers your prayers. Why aren't my prayers enough? Why do I have to have you? You're only weak in the daytime when I'm strong.
13. SOMETIMES I WISH SHE WOULD SINK HER TEETH INTO MY NECK! It felt so good, & then I just sort of passed out. I felt in a way that she loved me. What was the name of that?—"Close Encounters!" (See No.710.) It was almost like a love affair, almost like sex, when she sank her teeth into the back of my neck! It felt so good!
14. MAYBE SOMEHOW THE LORD WILL SOMETIMES EVEN MAKE OUR ENEMIES BE A COMFORT! Even if they kill you, they're doing His will! She put me out of my fear & misery, like an inoculation or injection of a sedative. At first I was so frightened, I was running desperately trying to get away. But she was superhuman & supernaturally fast, like Superwoman! It was like she loved me & wanted me & got me, & then sank her teeth into my neck, & it felt so good, that I just relaxed & went to sleep, & I didn't worry anymore.—I just woke up!
15. MAYBE IT MEANS THAT EVEN IF YOUR ENEMIES KILL YOU‚ IT'S THE LORD'S WAY OF PUTTING YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY! The Lord engineers everything: Your worries, your troubles, your frights, your fears, your enemies—even your death! Then you wake up with the Lord! When I'm having these terrifying dreams & fears & battles‚ if your hand touches me, wherever it is—on my head, my neck‚ my arm, my penie, anywhere—if your hand is just on me, then everything is OK & I'm not worried anymore.-Otherwise, it's a battle!
16. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, BUT I REALLY FIGHT TO STAY ALIVE IN THE NIGHT! The demons of Hell try to kill me, & they try to kill me with fear! I really feel like I'm dying, like I'm going to die! I thought at least I'll quote Scripture‚ & I was quoting the 23rd Psalm when you woke up. But I was having a problem getting those last verses. I was getting it mixed up with another one, Psalm 27:4‚ that I got at my Mother's death:
17. "ONE THING HAVE I DESIRED OF THE LORD, THAT WILL I SEEK AFTER; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, & to inquire in His temple. For in time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion: in the secret of His tabernacle shall He hide me; He shall set me up upon a rock." (Ps.27:4 & 5)
18. I THOUGHT AT THE END OF THE PSALM I'D JUST DIE & GO TO BE WITH THE LORD. I just felt like I couldn't fight anymore, that I'd just die with that verse, but all of a sudden you woke up out of a sound sleep & held onto me!—You caught me! I was so tried I couldn't fight anymore, & I thought with this last verse I was going to die & go to be with the Lord.
19. I THOUGHT, "I'M GOING NOW, & I WANT TO DIE SAYING THE 23RD PSALM." But I had a real battle over the end. I think the Lord stopped me so I didn't die because I figured‚ "Now when I'm finished with this 23rd Psalm, then I'll go." But I kept getting the verses mixed up: "For Thy rod & Thy staff, they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me"—"For whom shall I fear, the Lord is with me! Of whom shall I be afraid?" A mixture of the 23rd Psalm & the 27th Psalm!
20. I WAS TRYING TO GET THE LAST VERSES SO I COULD DIE. I figured it was just too much for me. I couldn't stand any more, & I was trying to find the last verse: "This one thing have I desired of the Lord."—But that's not the 23rd Psalm! I was getting my Psalms all mixed up, Honey!
21. I WAS TRYING & TRYING TO GET THAT LAST VERSE, OF THE 23RD, SO I COULD DIE, BUT I NEVER FOUND IT! "This one thing have I desired of the Lord, that I shall dwell in His courts. ..."—But that's not the 23rd Psalm! There was something missing, so I thought, "Well, I'll just end it anyhow!" & I began to quote it: "And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever," & I was just going to die, when suddenly you woke up real quick & turned over & laid hands on me!—You caught me!
22. AHH!—NOW IT COMES!: "SURELY GOODNESS & MERCY SHALL FOLLOW ME all the days of my life: & I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever!" Ah, that's the verse I couldn't remember! The Devil really didn't want me to remember that part of the verse!: "Surely goodness & mercy shall follow me all the days of my life"—while I'm alive! I guess the Lord also was probably stalling me off until He could wake you up! I couldn't remember that part between‚ so I couldn't get to the last part, so I couldn't die!
23. I THOUGHT‚ WHEN I FINISH THAT LAST VERSE, THEN I'LL DIE. But instead, other verses kept coming to me, like: "For though an host shall encamp against me, my heart shall not feat: Though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident." (Ps.27:3.) Thank God for the Scriptures! They kept coming to me just like somebody was quoting them to me! But I knew I was missing something. I could not for the life of me remember that last verse of the 23rd Psalm! "Surely goodness & mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: & I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." (Ps.23:6)
24. I BET THE DEVIL HATES THAT VERSE! It's about life & death. "Surely goodness & mercy shall follow me all the days of my life"—that's about life! And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever!"—That's death!—Or life after death‚ the other life, the next life! PTL! Hallelujah!
25. BUT SOMETIMES I ALMOST GO CRAZY IN THE NIGHT, I GET SO TERRIFIED & SO PARANOID! My God‚ how the Devil attacks me! But the minute you wake up, I feel so relieved I go to sleep. I feel like I don't have to worry anymore.—You can take over. If I wasn't telling you about it now‚ I'd be asleep already.
26. IT DOESN'T REALLY SEEM TO MATTER HOW MUCH I PRAY & cry to the Lord & agonise & fight & battle, or even try to drink to drown my fears. I can't seem to get the victory alone. I'm such a poor, weak prophet, it seems impossible. I never can get the victory until you wake up & put your hand on me & pray for me.
27. WHEN I'M WEAK, THEN YOU'RE STRONG, FOR YOUR STRENGTH IS MADE PERFECT IN MY WEAKNESS! (2Cor.12:9,10.) There was something about fear ... some verses about, "I will not be afraid, I will not fear"—some of those verses like that. But I couldn't finish the Psalm. I had to somehow get that other verse in order to finish it, & I couldn't. Boy, the Devil doesn't like that verse, because I could not seem to find "goodness & mercy!"—All I could find was evil & cruelty & fear & fright!
28. IT'S LIKE TERROR IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!—Terror in the night! It's horrible! It's the strangest thing—the minute you're awake, all those forces run—They flee! How come you're stronger than me? The minute you wake up & touch me, they all flee.
29. THEY'RE MORE AFRAID OF YOU THAN THEY ARE OF ME! How come they get me down, but not you? They're all gone when you wake up, like a bubble or balloon that bursts—like you stick a pin in'm & they deflate! How come I can't do that? Sometimes I stay awake nearly all night‚ then you touch me like a fairy with a fairy wand, & it all disappears!—They all flee! With me,
30. "THE ENEMY COMES IN LIKE A FLOOD‚" but then you wake up, the minute you touch me, the Spirit of God raises a standard against him, & they all run! Isn't that odd? I don't understand that, or why I can't get rid of them until you wake up.—It must be my weakness, huh?
31. I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE THE GIFT OF FAITH. But since faith is my strength, fear must be my weakness. Faith is my greatest strength, & fear my greatest weakness. Isn't that terrible? That's awful!—To think I'm so weak that I have to have you touch me to make them flee! That seems to show you have more faith than I do, & more power! I'm just a weak little tiny prophet.
32. YOU'RE MY GREAT BIG & STRONG BRUNHELD NOW!—My funny little Brunheld! Rachel deserted me! Now you have her mantle & her sword & shield & spear, her armour. She was so beautiful, glorious & mighty! But she just took it all off & threw it away, & ran off after a delusion!
33. HOW COULD SHE HAVE BEEN SO EASILY DELUDED?—By selfishness, evil desires, covetousness & riches & lack of love for the poor! Isn't that a shame? Isn't that terrible? She abandoned all of that, her armour & everything, & ran off & deserted me! (See Letters 336C & 763.)
34. YOU MAKE A CUTE LITTLE BRUNHELD‚ SO CUTE! HALLELUJAH!—The pen is mightier than the sword!—Your pen is mightier than her sword! Honey you don't know how good it is to have you awake beside me! Now I can rest. Now you can fight.—But you don't even have to fight!—All you have to do is wake up & put your hand on me & pray, & then they all run!
35. THE DEMONS MUST KNOW THAT'S MY WEAKNESS. They really prey on me. My God, what horrors & nightmares I have! I felt sure I was going to die—till you came. I thought, "At least I'm going to die with the 23rd Psalm on my breath," but I couldn't remember the last verses.
36. I COULDN'T FIND, "SURELY GOODNESS & MERCY."—The Devil really fought that one! It seems like he would have liked to have had me find it & remember it, so I could find it & die. Maybe the Lord fought him! Maybe that verse was just too much for him.—He couldn't stand it.
37. "SURELY GOODNESS & MERCY SHALL FOLLOW ME all the days of my life!" How much goodness & mercy He shows us! I don't know why I worry so much. Sometimes I think I can't worry anymore about it—I just have to let you guys worry. It's too hard for me. I don't know if I can stand such a life much more. I hope so.
38. IT'S LIKE THE DEMONS FLEE WITH THE LIGHT—LIKE DRACULA & THE VAMPIRES! That's a very significant story—it makes it very clear that Christ's Cross is the only answer! When you're awake, all those demons depart & they stop persecuting me.
39. (MARIA: "TWO CAN PUT TEN THOUSAND TO FLIGHT!") There must be ten thousand of them!—Because I can't get rid of them by myself. But when you wake up, everything is all right. The minute you touch me, they all run.—So you're stronger than me.
40. YOU WERE ALWAYS THE STRONGEST.—You started it all! You were the strongest from the beginning. You prayed & talked in tongues, & all I did was interpret. You did it all—& the Lord—& I was just a poor weak old decrepit instrument. Now I can go to sleep without fear‚ when I know you & the Lord are in control.
41. IT'S SO WONDERFUL! NOW I HAVE TO ENJOY THE VICTORY FOR A LITTLE WHILE, & this wonderful‚ wonderful feeling of rest & peace! It's all over the minute you wake up & touch me & pray for me.—Then I don't worry anymore. I'm not afraid now, & I'm not dying anymore.—Why is that?
42. (MARIA: MOSES HAD TO HAVE SOMEBODY HOLD UP HIS HANDS, TOO.) (Ex.17:12.)—Right, Honey! That's a good illustration!—Even Moses couldn't hold up his hands by himself! Even Moses was weak & had to have help! That's me!—
43. I FOUGHT ALL NIGHT, BUT I COULDN'T GET THE VICTORY ALONE! I figured if I couldn't get the victory, I might as well go.—And I was almost gone when you woke up just like an electric shock & touched me & prayed for me & saved me.
44. I'M SO WEAK, SO TERRIBLE!—I JUST CAN'T MAKE IT WITHOUT YOU. I battled all night long, but I couldn't get the victory until you came & helped me, & then everything went the other way. Thank You Jesus!—In Jesus' name.
45. "SEE ME, FEEL ME, TOUCH ME, HEAL ME!"—That's your song, Honey, remember?—Written for you about me! (See No.561:38,39.) That's about Maria, & that's what happens.—You see? It's hard to believe, but it's true!—I'm so weak! I can't live without you.
46. I'M LIKE A VAMPIRE!: I HAVE TO SUCK ON YOUR STRENGTH TO LIVE! You give me life & breath & strength‚ & keep me from dying.—As long as you hold onto me, I can't go. If you hold onto me, I'll stay, God willing.
47. IT'S THE ENEMY'S TERRORISM!—The Devil uses terrorism, too: The whole idea in the world is for the Devil to frighten people into letting him have his way! (—Have you let him scare you out of God's will?)
48. JAN 11TH: TODAY I WAS WONDERING JUST WHAT TO CALL THESE ATTACKS OF THE ENEMY I sometimes suffer in the night, & I was trying to find a title for this experience, when suddenly the words came to me!:
49. "TERROR BY NIGHT!"—And I thought "That sounds familiar‚ like a Scripture!"—And immediately it came to me!:—The 91st Psalm!—The "Protection Psalm!"—So I turned to it, & there it was!—The 5th Verse!"
50. "THOU SHALT NOT BE AFRAID FOR THE TERROR BY NIGHT!" Hallelujah! PTL! We don't have to be afraid of it, if we'll just claim these wonderful promises of the 91st Psalm & the 23rd & 27th Psalms I kept getting in my battle! Read them! Claim them! Fight the Enemy with the Word—Like Jesus did during His temptation!! (Mt.4:1-11.)
51. SO EVERY NIGHT SINCE THEN, MARIA'S BEEN READING ME TO SLEEP WITH THESE SCRIPTURES & the local family's been praying desperately that I could sleep without these attacks of the Enemy, & I've been sleeping peacefully & soundly all night long‚ & feeling so much better in the days too! Praise God! It works!—The wonderful Word works!—And prayers of helpers too!—Try'm!—GBAKY!—In Jesus' name, Amen! (I now keep a light on too! Ha!)