KEYWORDS: god, animals, name, adam

Naming the Baby

David Berg

—MOFebruary 7, 1975NO.338—GP

P.O. Box 31, London WC2E 7LX, England or GPO Box 3141, San Juan, Puerto Rico 00936

God bless you all! Congratulations on your new arrival‚ the precious little new Child of God! I trust by this time you've gotten a name for it from the Lord, which is a parent's responsibility unless God somehow leads otherwise.

2. IT'S A PART OF YOUR JOB TO SEEK THE LORD AND REALLY SEEK HIM EARNESTLY TO FIND OUT WHAT NAME THE LORD WOULD HAVE YOU GIVE TO YOUR CHILD. Because that's quite a responsibility‚ choosing a name‚ a name which you choose for him and in which he has no choice, but which he will have to bear for the rest of his life! I know I've done it several times and it has been a very sobering thought and I have really prayed very earnestly about it and sought the Lord very very earnestly each time as we named one of our children, that it would be the name that God wanted them to have.

3. THE LORD DID HELP US CHOOSE, we felt, some good names and that fit them well and which they used for a long time, although the Lord has given them other names in recent days. So even if he doesn't like the name you give him, in our outfit he can always change it when he's older, so don't take it too hard.

4. YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE YOUR NAME when you feel like it around here, so thank the Lord. But in the meantime‚ why, I'm sure the Lord will lead you to give him a name, something that means a great deal to you and is significant to you, and will please your child.

5. AS SO OFTEN HAPPENS, WE GIVE OUR CHILDREN NAMES OF BIBLE HEROES AND OTHERS THAT WE WOULD LIKE THEM TO BE LIKE OR THAT WE ADMIRE. We sometimes name them in honour of the person or the individual in God's Word or in the history of His Church that we really admire and think a great deal of and wish to honour by naming our child after him‚ hoping of course that our child will be like him.

6. SO THIS IS A GREAT RESPONSIBILITY TO CHOOSE A NAME FOR A CHILD and a sobering one, but I'm sure if you'll pray and really seek the Lord, the Lord will help you in your choice.—Praise the Lord? It's only on very rare occasions that I've gotten names for other people's children and only under very unusual circumstances, a very rare exception.

7. ALTHOUGH A GOOD MANY PEOPLE HAVE WANTED ME TO NAME THEIR CHILDREN FOR THEM‚ I HAVE USUALLY REFUSED and told them that that was their responsibility, unless God gave me by some direct outright revelation for some very remarkable reason a name that they should be called, and this has been usually under some very unusual circumstances.

8. SO I WOULD HESITATE TO NAME ANYONE'S CHILD JUST AS MUCH AS I WOULD HESITATE TO NAME ANYONE'S MATE or choose your mate for you. That is a job that you and you alone can do with the Lord's help, and it's a very touchy job at that, and I certainly wouldn't want to be blamed for making a mistake!

9. SO IT'S MUCH WISER FOR YOU TO MAKE YOUR OWN CHOICES, and if you recall the letter "Choice", this is one of the reasons we were put here, to make choices and to make decisions. We often shy away from these responsibilities and prefer to do it some other way or have someone else do it for us.

10. BUT WHEN WE DON'T MAKE OUR OWN CHOICES WE'RE SHRINKING FROM OUR JOB and our own responsibility and the main purpose for which we were placed here, and that is to make choices, to make decisions in the Lord and under His guidance so that He will see what we will do or what we will choose or decide.

11. WHEN ADAM WAS ALONE IN THE GARDEN AFTER GOD MADE HIM AND ALL THE ANIMALS, GOD BROUGHT EACH OF THE ANIMALS TO HIM TO SEE WHAT HE WOULD NAME THEM! How about that! It's in the Second Chapter of Genesis following the very verse that we quote so often, the 18th verse: "And the Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone, I will make him an help meet for him.

12. "AND OUT OF THE GROUND THE LORD GOD FORMED EVERY BEAST OF THE FIELD, AND EVERY FOWL OF THE AIR."—And what was God aiming at making for man?—An helpmeet! All of these beasts and birds are also our helpmeets‚ they were created to help us, amen? Of course God was aiming at the main helpmeet that was to be created eventually. But first of all He had to show Adam that none of these were sufficient for him.

13. "AND HE BROUGHT THEM UNTO ADAM TO SEE WHAT HE WOULD CALL THEM; AND WHATSOEVER ADAM CALLED EVERY LIVING CREATURE, THAT WAS THE NAME THEREOF!"—How about that! Well, that's quite a task to have to name all the animals! But whatever name Adam gave them, that name was the name that stuck!

14. ADAM GAVE NAMES TO ALL CATTLE, AND TO THE FOWL OF THE AIR, AND TO EVERY BEAST OF THE FIELD."—Think of that! Wow‚ what a job! That must have taken quite a few weeks, maybe months, maybe years! There are an awful lot of animals and a lot of birds, and it certainly must have been quite a job for Adam to have to think up names for them all!

15. ONE THE FIRST PARTS OF MAN'S EDUCATION WAS "NAMING THE BABY"! God wanted to see what man would call them. Now why did God want to see what man would call the animals? He had made Adam how?—He had made him in His own image after His own likeness.

16. ADAM WAS LIKE GOD!—HE HAD THE MAJESTY OF CHOICE, he could do good or evil, and he was similar to God in his thinking and in his emotions and in his personality. Adam resembled God, and this was the thing which God did in order to make man to resemble Himself in many ways, in His image and His likeness.

17. HE SAYS IN ONE PLACE, "BEHOLD YE ARE GODS!—Are ye not gods?" (John 10:34,35 and Psalm 82:6.) We indeed are like gods. Man was created to be like God Himself‚ like the gods of the spirit world, yet in a body of flesh bound with the earth and earthen things, "and of the earth, earthy."

18. BUT MAN HAS NOT QUITE AS MUCH FREEDOM BY ANY MEANS AS THE SPIRITS. Man is confined to this world and a certain environment and to certain limitations‚ physical weaknesses and restrictions‚ so that though he were a god in spirit, in a sense, he being on probation and being put to the test of choice, cannot do too much damage in a fleshly body.

19. SO THEREFORE MAN IS VERY MUCH LIMITED IN THE FLESH and bound by the flesh and weighted down by the flesh, restricted by the flesh in his movements and in his powers and in his abilities—his abilities to do good as well as in his abilities to do evil.

20. WE ARE LIKE THE LORD AND WE ARE MADE LIKE UNTO HIM IN MANY RESPECTS, having personalities, spirits, emotions, virtues and so on‚ characteristics of human personality resembling God Himself.

21. BUT WE ARE PLACED IN HUMAN BODIES WHICH LIMIT OUR ABILITY TO OPERATE AS GODS, and therefore also, thank God, these fleshly bodies restrict our abilities to do damage should we choose to do evil. Nevertheless‚ man by the wisdom of Satan has created instruments and weapons of war which now can do very great evil and destroy a great deal.

22. STILL MAN'S RESTRICTIONS AND LIMITATIONS ARE MUCH GREATER THAN THOSE PLACED UPON THE SPIRITS, the spirit gods of the spirit world, who are much greater in power, mightier in influence and have much more ability to either do good or to do evil.

23. BUT EVEN THESE SPIRIT BEINGS ARE CREATED WITHIN CERTAIN RESTRICTIONS AND LIMITATIONS so that they cannot do too much harm, but must operate according to the laws of God and only within His certain limitations and jurisdictions, even as He made man.

24. SO GOD CREATED ALL OF THESE ANIMALS TO BE COMPANIONS FOR MAN‚ to be a help to man, to bear his burdens, to sing him songs, to keep him company, to furnish him with power, transportation and companionship. Many times it has been said the dog is "man's best friend". I'm not too sure about that‚ considering some of the dogs I've seen and had experience with as a delivery boy! But dogs and cats and domestic animals can be very precious pets and very close companions and furnish a great deal of companionship to the lonely and the alone and can really show love and respond to love and show a great deal of affection and show emotions, even sorrow. Some dogs have died of sorrow over their master's death and this sort of thing.

25. SO THE ANIMALS WERE CREATED ALSO WITH SPIRITS OF SOME KIND, despite some people's opinions, and they have emotions, they can love, they can hate, they can be very affectionate and they can respond to affection, show a great deal of love and respond to love.

26. THE ANIMALS ARE ALSO VERY VERY SENSITIVE IN THE SPIRIT. Animals have been known to sense their master's death, to sense tragedy, to sense impending catastrophes and to even awake and bark and warn their masters of these things before they happen or even a great distance from where they were happening!

27. WHOEVER THINKS THAT ANIMALS DON'T HAVE SPIRITS DOESN'T KNOW HIS ANIMALS! Even psychologists, psychiatrists and scientists and ESP scientists today investigating Extra Sensory Perception have proven that animals in multitudes of cases have had remarkable Extra Sensory Perception‚ meaning beyond the limitations of their normal five senses. They have sensed things which were happening or were about to happen sometimes miles away!

28. SO GOD HAS MADE THE ANIMALS VERY SENSITIVE IN THE SPIRIT, sensitive to your spirit and sensitive to other spirits. I've talked about animals we used to have on the ranch: Most of them were very docile, very obedient and very submissive. But I can remember one old cow we called "Old Red" that I am sure must have had a devil or was possessed of a demon and caused nothing but trouble and was always leading the others astray!

29. SO ANIMALS ARE VERY VERY REMARKABLE CREATIONS OF GOD AND WERE CREATED FOR MANY PURPOSES. We don't have time to enumerate them all here. I don't have as much time to tell you all about the different animals as Adam had to name them, but I'm sure you can think of a few examples yourself. I've just given you some of the most common, such as the loyalty of household pets and examples of domestic animals and their reactions to spiritual things.

30. THEY ARE ALSO VERY SYMPATHETIC AND VERY RESPONSIVE TO MAN'S NEEDS on many occasions and will work hard on his behalf to help him and with a real spirit of loyalty and fealty and love. They will do many of his tasks for him and perform these better out of love than by force.

31. WE ALWAYS FOUND OUT THAT THE ANIMALS ON THE FARM WOULD WORK FOR US BETTER IF WE HANDLED THEM WITH LOVE and with gentleness than if we tried to break their spirit with a two-by-four or hardness like we saw some cowboys trying to break them! Some responded just like people to love and gentleness and were very responsive and learned to obey as a result, because they knew we loved them and were good to them, fed them and were kind to them, and therefore they would be very obedient.


33. GOD HIMSELF USES ANIMALS AND THE NAMES OF ANIMALS TO DESCRIBE MAN. He uses these very names for animals and these very animals to be used as examples of men, describing the characteristics and the dispositions of men, like Herod "that old fox", etc. Then He speaks of some people as being "dogs" or "pigs" or "swine" and He speaks of some being like the "sloth" and others like the "ants".

34. GOD USES MANY MANY EXAMPLES OF THE CREATURES THAT HE HAS MADE TO COMPARE MAN TO THEM and their characteristics, using these animals as examples and illustrations of the personality traits of man himself, amazing illustrations of man and his personality, so that some men are like these different animals.

35. GOD GAVE SO MANY ANIMALS AND SO MANY CREATURES TO HELP MAN. All the beautiful birds not only sing but also perform many other duties in helping to pollinate and to seed and feed and to accomplish many things which are useful to man and the rest of creation in the balance of nature.

36. THE ANIMALS ARE VERY IMPORTANT TO OUR EXISTENCE, and we cannot live without them nor the birds, all of which are very important. As we said before, song birds are always a sign of the blessing of God and so encouraging!

37. OF COURSE SOME BIRDS ARE VULTURES like some men, but even they perform their particular service. On the ranch I used to tell my boys‚ "Don't even shoot the buzzards!—They're God's garbage men! They eat up the scraps and the dead carcasses and help God dispose of the garbage."

38. SO "ALL OF THESE CREATURES OF GOD ARE GOOD and nothing to be refused," and they all have their place and their tasks and their duties, and they're very important to the creation of God. Yet although they were so important‚ not amongst them anywhere was found a perfect helpmeet for Adam: "But for Adam there was not found an help meet for him."—Genesis 2:20.

39. THE PERFECT MATE FOR ADAM WAS NOT FOUND AMONGST THE ANIMALS, and this is one reason why God curses sexual bestialism in the Mosaic Law and He still curses it to this day! Man behaving like animals sexually and even having intercourse with animals sexually was accursed of God! Under the old Mosaic Law, anybody caught so engaged was to be immediately stoned to death! That's what God thought about it and how horrible He thought it was, it was such a sickening thought to God that man should so defile himself and so abase himself as to literally make an animal out of himself and make himself bestial in the eyes of God as well as the eyes of man!

40. NEVERTHELESS‚ THE ANIMALS IN THEIR PLACE HAVE THEIR PURPOSE and their helpfulness to man. We have even discoursed on this to some extent with some of you about the spirits of animals.

41. THERE MUST BE SOME OF THEM THAT GO TO HEAVEN! In Space City I very definitely met that lion which was licking my face!

42. I'VE EVEN HAD INDICATIONS IN RECENT TIMES THAT THE SPIRIT OF ONE OF MY OLD PET DOGS HAS BEEN WITH ME AND HAS HELPED TO GUARD ME! Sometimes I wondered what the other dogs were growling at when I passed by: They were not even looking at me! Dogs are so sensitive in the spirit they're probably barking at him, Rex, the big police–dog that I loved so dearly!

43. PEOPLE OFTEN ASK THE QUESTION ABOUT WHERE SOME VERY BELOVED PET HAS GONE THAT HAS PASSED ON, whether they would see him again in the afterlife in Heaven. Well frankly, you may be shocked by this‚ but I'm beginning to be convinced that with some this may be true! Because in the next world God's Word says, "without there were dogs" and so on! (Rev.22:15.) "But", you say, "He's probably speaking of people!" Well, you can't prove to me He's speaking only of people! He was speaking of some people.

44. EVEN MY OWN FATHER, A GREAT BIBLE TEACHER, USED TO SAY THAT PERHAPS PART OF THE CURSE OF THE AFTERLIFE WAS THAT SOME PEOPLE WOULD BE TURNED INTO THE KIND OF ANIMALS THAT THEY WERE AS MEN—pigs and dogs and swine and stubborn oxen or mules and things like that! That may sound a little Oriental in religion and like some of the Oriental religions which believe in reincarnation, but maybe that's where the idea of reincarnation originated.

45. WHEN SOME OF THE SO-CALLED PENTECOSTAL OUTPOURINGS OCCURRED, SOME OF THE PEOPLE APPARENTLY DIDN'T GET THE RIGHT SPIRIT and got down on all fours and barked like dogs and some wiggled on the ground and crawled like serpents! Also in some of the horrible nightmares and drug dreams that some of you have had, you've seen some terrible monsters and awful creatures and with very horrible animalistic characteristics!

46. THE COMMON CONCEPTION OF DEMONS BY THE OLD ARTISTS WAS VERY REPTILIAN. They were like reptiles or crawling monsters and snakes and serpents—all kinds of horrible creatures which we do have in animal and creature form. In folklore and mythology the demons and the devils and evil spirits were frequently taking on these legendary forms themselves.

47. THIS IS A COMMON FORM IN WHICH DEVILS AND DEMONS AND EVIL SPIRITS HAVE APPEARED TO PEOPLE. Man himself is often abased and abominated and bestialised in this life! So if he has made a dog or a pig of himself, why could it not be that men as punishment should actually be compelled to take on such forms of such beasts in the after life, at least for a time as a purgatorial punishment or a retribution for the evil lives they have lived?

48. MAYBE IT'S THEORY, BUT I'VE HAD A LOT OF EXPERIENCE and seen a lot of things and heard a lot of stories which have convinced me that there must be some truth to it, so I'm expecting to see, as I already have in the other life, some animals! Apparently some of them are going to survive in spirit—maybe not all—but some—certainly in the Millennium!

49. SO ADAM'S TASK OF "NAMING THE BABY" OR NAMING THE ANIMALS WAS A VERY IMPORTANT ONE, naming them whatever name he thought fit them according to their animalistic characteristics‚ or their characteristics possibly resembling man or however he named them. We don't know, we're not told, but it was a big job!

50. HE CERTAINLY MUST HAVE RACKED HIS BRAIN FOR NAMES considering the thousands of different kinds of animals and creatures and birds that there are! It must have taken him quite a while! But apparently it was quite interesting to God to see what man would call them. He says that He brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them.

51. NOW WHY DID GOD WANT TO KNOW WHAT ADAM WAS GOING TO CALL THE CREATURES, THE ANIMALS‚ THE BIRDS? Why didn't God name them Himself? God knew all about them: He'd made them and knew what they were like. Why did He want Adam's reaction?

52. WELL WHY DID GOD CREATE US TO RESPOND TO HIS CREATION IN VARIOUS WAYS AND TO SEE HOW WE WOULD RESPOND AND WHAT CHOICE WE WOULD MAKE and what decisions we would make with the majesty of choice that He's given us. Why did God do that?—You tell me! Apparently it's of interest to God to see what His creature, man, will do under certain circumstances, how he will respond to certain stimuli and how he will react under certain conditions.

53. SOME PEOPLE ACCUSE GOD OF PLAYING SOME KIND OF GAME, that He's amused at the antics of His creation and it's all for sport and His entertainment. Others accuse God of being a great scientist who is merely conducting a great scientific experiment with man and His creation just to see how he would react and so on.

54. WELL, PERHAPS GOD'S A LITTLE BIT OF BOTH!—MAYBE HE'S BOTH A SPORT AND A SCIENTIST! Maybe He's amused by some of the reactions of His creation just as you and I are entertained by two little kittens as they're playing or little puppies as they play or the little goats as they frisk about the pasture, jump and climb‚ and the little lambs as they cavort and gambol about the field.

55. PERHAPS THE FARMER FEELS A LITTLE BIT LIKE GOD HIMSELF and the Creator of these animals, as he's the husbandman and he raises them and breeds them and so on, and he's amused by them. Perhaps God's amused just as you're amused by your new little baby and his funny antics and funny expressions and all the cute little things he does.

56. PEOPLE PLAY WITH THEIR BABIES, babies do play and they do laugh and they smile and they cry and they do all kinds of funny things, so that we've been entertained for hours by the antics of some of our own babies, and we have really been amused and enjoyed it, and in a way they are our little creations aren't they?

57. SO IF WE ARE AMUSED AND PLEASURABLY ENTERTAINED BY OUR OWN LITTLE CREATIONS, OUR OWN BABIES (which of course are really the creations of God, but we have had something to do with it!), then God Himself surely is also entertained and amused by our antics and the funny doings of His own creation‚ all of this‚ man and the animals and so on.

58. HE CERTAINLY MADE A LOT OF FUNNY ONES and humorous ones, and He certainly had a sense of humour in a great deal of the creations, including some people!

59. BUT OF COURSE SOME OF IT IS NOT SO FUNNY and is in the nature of a more serious experiment of the Scientist to see what we will do, to see how we will reaction, to see if we will make the right choice and take the right action‚ make the right decision.

60. HE HAS TO GIVE US THE OPPORTUNITY TO DO SO, TO HAVE OUR OWN WAY AND CHOICE to see if we will do our own will or His will or the Devil's will or whatever we will do. So all of His creation has been made for a purpose, and why God made it is His own business!

61. IT'S LIKE THE THINGS WE WROTE ABOUT SEX—"YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A DOCTOR TO ENJOY IT, you don't have to understand electricity to use it"! So you don't have to know why God made the world and us and the animals and all in order to enjoy it and to live in it and to take part in it and to enjoy life and to enjoy love and to enjoy helping others and so on.

62. ALL WE KNOW IS, GOD DID IT, and He did it I'm sure for whatever reasons He felt best, for His sake and our sake and the sake of a lesson to all the Universe. Perhaps it's a great lesson to all the spirit world and all the gods and goddesses and the good spirits and evil spirits including the Devil himself, to give them all a good sample of what is right and what is wrong and how that right pays off and wrong pays off too!

63. SO I'M SURE GOD HAD A REASON for all of this, and one of the main reasons was to give us a choice‚ give us a chance to make a choice, and He was interested in the choices that we and Adam would make, Adam and Eve both, as we eventually found out!

64. HE'S INTERESTED IN YOUR CHOICES, He's interested in my choices, He's concerned to see that if we are given this great majesty of choice we will make the right choices. Of course He is sad to see when we make the wrong choices.

65. BUT IT MUST HAVE BEEN VERY INTERESTING FOR HIM TO SEE WHAT KIND OF NAMES ADAM WOULD CHOOSE TO CALL HIS ANIMALS. This was one of the first jobs He gave Adam to do besides tending the Garden: Adam had to name all the animals. Did you ever think about that? Well, it was a big job and he must have had to do a lot of thinking and a lot of praying and a lot of looking around trying to dream up new names for all those animals! Now you just think about it a little bit and see if you don't think that would be a pretty big job to have to name all the animals.

66. SO IT MUST HAVE BEEN QUITE AMUSING TO GOD AND OF GREAT INTEREST TO THE LORD JUST TO WATCH ADAM WORKING AWAY AT TRYING TO FIGURE OUT EACH NEW NAME! Along came the elephant. Maybe he'd already named the hippopotamus and the rhinoceros and the oxen and a few others; and now comes another one! "Oh Lord, how many animals have we got anyhow, and how many more names am I going to have to think up! I've already about exhausted my vocabulary and I don't know what to call them!"

67. SO HE MUST HAVE HAD QUITE A TIME TRYING TO NAME ALL THE ANIMALS! Even though a satisfactory personal helpmate was not found amongst all the animals for Adam, perhaps God had to show him this. Maybe this was a part of the whole process of Adam's education: Adam looked each of the animals over and examined their characteristics and their physiques and their traits and their looks trying to decide not only on a name but which one would be the best buddy for him, which one could be his pet or his pal or his companion.

68. APPARENTLY HE WASN'T COMPLETELY SATISFIED WITH ANY OF THEM EVEN THOUGH HE NAMED THEM ALL‚ none of them fully met his needs, there wasn't one found amongst all of them that was the real help meet for him he really needed. They all had their helpfulness and their usefulness, but not amongst any of them could Adam find one that he would choose for a mate or a helpmeet.—And you know what God finally did about that of course!

69. GOD FINALLY CREATED A VERY LOVELY HELPMEET FOR HIM LIKE HIMSELF, which of course was undoubtedly God's intention all along, but He just wanted to see what Adam's reaction would be when Adam found himself still all alone. Even with all those animals and all those birds he still wasn't happy. He was still quite lonely because he hadn't found anybody who was really like himself and could be considered his mate.

70. ALL THE ANIMALS AND THE BIRDS HAD THEIR MATES who were like themselves, after their kind, but in all the world there wasn't another creature after Adam's kind. So the dear Lord had to show Adam this to perhaps help him to see his need so he'd appreciate her when she arrived. Otherwise he might have neglected her or not have been as thankful for her as he should have been.

71. BUT ADAM MUST'VE BEEN PRETTY DESPERATE FOR A MATE BY THE TIME HE GOT THROUGH SPENDING WEEKS OR MONTHS EXAMINING AND NAMING ALL OF THE ANIMALS and trying to choose a helpmeet and not finding one amongst them! He must have been pretty desperate for companionship when he couldn't find a mate amongst all the animals.

72. SO BY THAT TIME HE WAS RIPE AND READY FOR EVE, and when he woke up and saw her there, after being put under God's anesthesia in order to create her out of his side near his heart, he must have just about flipped!

73. "AHHHH!—WOW!—NOW THAT'S JUST WHAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR ALL THE TIME!—Why didn't you do this sooner‚ Lord? How come You made me wait so long? Here I've been living with all these animals, trying to name all these strange birds, and all this time I've been waitin'‚ this is what I've been waiting for!"

74. REMINDS ME OF SOME OF YOU GUYS LIVING IN SOME OF THESE COLONIES, you've probably felt like that sometimes! "Lord, here I am living with all these animals and all these queer birds and whatnot in these Colonies!—Why don't You send me along a mate?"

75. JUST BE PATIENT AND WAIT AND PRAY AND KEEP LOOKING, and one of these days you may wake up and find her lying right there beside you and say, "Wow!—Hallelujah!—This is what I've been looking for all the time!"

76. YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A NAME FOR HER! You didn't know who she was or where she was going to come from or how you were going to get her or what her name was—you just had to wait and pray and hope while you looked over all the other animals and all the other strange birds and you didn't find a bird for yourself or one little animal for your own pet!

77. BUT IF YOU JUST WAIT AND BE PATIENT, GOD ALWAYS BRINGS ALONG THE RIGHT MATE at the right time, and by that time you'll really appreciate her. Probably if He jumped the gun and brought her too soon you wouldn't be very thankful and you wouldn't have had a chance to look over all the other animals and all the other birds and realise that that wasn't where it was at, and that wasn't what you were looking for.

78. OTHERWISE IF HE BROUGHT YOUR LITTLE EVE ON THE SCENE TOO SOON‚ YOU MIGHT KEEP ON LOOKING AFTER YOU FOUND HER!—Ahem!—As some of you apparently have, sad to say! So maybe God's waiting process is a part of the process of testing you first of all to see what kind of decision you'll make, and last of all to see if you're willing to wait and be patient and let the Lord make the decision for that matter, bringing the right one along.

79. IN A WAY THAT'S WHAT GOD FINALLY DID WITH ADAM: HE REALLY FINALLY HAD TO LET GOD MAKE THE DECISION. He didn't find anybody that suited him, anything that suited him, and so he didn't know what to do. Well, by that time he was ready for God's choice, wasn't he? After trying to choose for himself and naming all the animals and looking them all over and not being able to find even one for a helpmeet‚ he must have been pretty desperate by that time and ready for almost anything God would choose!

80. AND OF COURSE, GOD ALWAYS CHOOSES THE BEST AND WHAT'S BEST FOR US‚ the unbeatable choice‚ and Adam was really ready for her when God created her!—Amen? So that maybe one reason why God lets us have to go through these experiences where we have to make decisions and choices and we have to have patience and we have to wait.

81. THAT WAY WE CAN LEARN HOW TO BE PATIENT, WHICH TAKES FAITH; and how to wait, which takes trusting God; and how to make the right kind of a decision, which takes a lot of looking over of other animals and birds first to make sure you know that's not where it's at, until you finally find the right one.

82. I KNOW IT TOOK ME A GOOD MANY YEARS BEFORE I FOUND THE RIGHT ONE and I'm so thankful that I waited, praise God! I could have jumped the gun and run off with the wrong one and had hell on Earth and the Devil to pay!

83. BUT I THANK GOD THAT I LOOKED OVER ALL THE OTHER BIRDS AND ANIMALS FIRST and all the beasts—(and some of them were really strange specimens!) until I finally got desperate in prayer with the Lord and asked Him to bring the right one to me, which is what He did with Adam.

84. IT SAYS "AND HE BROUGHT HER UNTO THE MAN", 22ND VERSE, AND ADAM, HE FLIPPED! God made this gorgeous gal, the most beautiful woman ever made, the most perfect woman ever made, and in the most beautiful and romantic place on Earth‚ the Garden of Eden, and He brought her to the man stark naked! Think of that! Whew! That was revolutionary‚ huh!

85. IMAGINE MEETING A GIRL FOR THE FIRST TIME STARK NAKED! What kind of an effect would that have on you?—Probably the same effect it immediately had on Adam! He no doubt shouted "Hallelujah!—This is what I've been looking for all the time! This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh! This is like me! This is my gal, this is my kind of gal! This is after my kind! This is what I've been waiting for all the time!

86. "SHE SHALL BE CALLED WOMAN OR WOO—MAN" (HOW 'BOUT THAT!)—WHICHEVER WAY YOU WANT TO INTERPRET IT!—They woo us and sometimes bring us a little woe! But they also make us "W-h-o-a!", if you understand American lingo on how to make a horse stop: You say, "Whoa!"—And this is what some women have to do to some of you guys sometimes when you're going the wrong direction or too fast!

87. SO HE SAID, "SHE SHALL BE CALLED WOMAN", BECAUSE IT MEANT SHE WAS TAKEN OUT OF MAN according to the literal translation of the original language.—As we've said before, not out of his head so she could dominate him nor out of his foot so he could trample on her, but out of his side near his heart so that she could be his equal and be his love! So he must have been very happy when he found this ultimate creature!

88. AND WHAT WAS THE FIRST THING HE DID?—NO, IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!—THAT WAS SECOND!—FIRST HE HAD TO NAME HER! After naming all those animals he must have been pretty well practiced at naming‚ so he was really ready to name God's final crowning creation, the most gorgeous gal in the world, that lovely lass in Paradise, dear Edenic Eve!

89. SO PRAISE GOD FOR THIS FINAL HELPMEET THAT GOD GAVE FOR ADAM and for bringing all the animals and all the birds to him to prove he couldn't find anybody better even though he tried'em all! He finally brought him the right one! And, thank God‚ Adam had enough sense to recognise right away that she was the right one for him! And what did he do?—He immediately named her!—How 'bout that girls!

90. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR HUSBAND TO NAME YOU FIRST GIRLS? Well, that's what Adam did! He named his wife on the spot! And they were both stark naked when they first met walking around in a Garden nude! Think of that!—Kind of a shocking introduction, don't you think? But he didn't say, "What's your name please?—I'm Adam, who are you?"

91. HE JUST RIGHT OFF THE BAT NAMED HER AND SAID‚ "SHE SHALL BE CALLED WOMAN!" Is that what you would have done? Is that what you did when you first met your wife, fellas? Did you say, "This is the one! This is my kind of gal!—Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh, this is my kind!—And I'm going to call you honey or baby or sweetheart or love-dove or love"—or whatever you call your dear little one!

92. HAVE YOU GOT A SPECIAL PET NAME FOR HER THAT YOU'VE NAMED HER? Well then, for goodness sake why should you parents worry so over naming your children and always looking around for somebody else to make the decision for you and wanting your leaders to please name the baby‚ when you've been knowing that baby was on the way for nine months!

93. IT CERTAINLY SEEMS LIKE NINE MONTHS WAS ENOUGH TIME FOR YOU TO BE THINKING OF NAMES, even if you had to get a name book and look'em all up to see what kind of names you like! There are some baby food agencies and baby milk and formula agencies that put out name books of the various kinds of names there are for boys and girls, if you can't find a name you like in the Bible.

94. WE LIKE TO NAME OUR KIDS BIBLE NAMES. But from the names some of you folks have chosen for yourselves from some of the strange characters in the Bible that I wouldn't want to be associated with myself, I'd hate to be your baby if you're gonna pick my name!

95. SOME OF YOU HAVE REALLY PICKED THE WEIRD NAMES of the kind of characters in the Bible that weren't exactly heroes! In fact, some were downright fiendish villains‚ and I'm sorry to say some of you seem to be living up to some of those names! So I don't know why in the world some of you guys would want to pick names like that! This has been a kind of a pet peeve with me for quite a while now!

96. OF COURSE, SOME OF YOU FOLKS WEREN'T THE GUILTY PARTY!—SOME OF YOUR LEADERS ACTUALLY CHOSE SUCH RIDICULOUS NAMES FOR YOU! They must've gone through the alphabetical list in the back of the Bible and couldn't find a pleasant name that hadn't already been taken so they just picked out any old name without looking up that character in the Bible to see what kind of a character he was!

97. SOME OF THESE NAMES WERE DOWNRIGHT BAD MEN, THE BAD GUYS, THE VILLAINS OF THE BIBLE!—And yet you went ahead and let them pick a name like that for you! Listen fellows and girls‚ if I were you, if I were going to choose a Bible name, I would sure seek the Lord for it and try to get God to pick my name!—And I would certainly look up in the Bible any strange name I hadn't heard of before to find out what kind of a character that was!

98. SOME OF YOU BOYS EVEN PICKED GIRL'S NAMES AND SOME OF YOU GIRLS PICKED BOY'S NAMES! Apparently you didn't look'em up in the Bible to see what the meaning of the name was!—Why, it could have been "cut-throat" or "damned liar" or "Jacob the Deceiver" or "crook" or whatever!

99. BUT YOU APPARENTLY WEREN'T A BIT INTERESTED IN WHAT THE NAME MEANT OR WHO IT WAS FOR! You just picked it because it sounded pretty, or at least nobody else had that name yet! Well, I want to tell you I've been on a beef about this naming business for a long time!

100. WHEN WE SUGGESTED FOR YOU TO PICK A BIBLE NAME, WE DIDN'T MEAN FOR YOU TO JUST SHUFFLE THEM IN A HAT INCLUDING ALL THE VILLAINS and all the evil characters and all the bad guys and bad girls in the Bible and just shuffle them up and pull any one out! We thought of course you'd pick one that you knew was a good Bible character you liked and wanted to be like and knew what kind of a character he or she was! We thought you'd pick some kind of a name that was halfway decent and had some halfway good meaning or was at least something nice or even pretty or good—certainly not some of the worst characters in history!

101. WE DON'T ONLY HAVE TO START NAMING THE BABIES, BUT WE MAYBE OUGHT TO START DOING A LITTLE RENAMING OF OURSELVES! Some of you people who either had a bad name picked for you, or you accidentally picked a bad name yourself without knowing what you were doing, you'd better go back to the Bible and study up on a few of those names and read your Bible a little more and try to find out who were the good characters & who were the good guys and the good girls and the ones you'd like to be like and you'd like to name your children after!

102. DON'T PICK A NAME JUST BECAUSE IT IS A CUTE SOUNDING NAME that you never saw before and you just found it in the list at the back of the Bible under proper names so you just decided "This sounds kind of nice!" You also give it your own pronunciation which we can't even recognise! Syria (sir'yah) turns into Syria (sy–ri'ah) and a few more!

103. YOU GIVE'EM ALL KINDS OF STRANGE NEW PRONUNCIATIONS THAT WE NEVER HEARD BEFORE which are not the normal Biblical pronunciations and so we don't even recognise the names! I heard of somebody called Shalom the other day and pronouncing it "Shal'lam" when it's supposed to be Sha-lom, the beautiful word for peace pronounced "Shahlome"! All kinds of beautiful Bible names some of you guys have got twisted all around to where it doesn't even sound like the original name even when it's a good name!

104. YOU OUGHT TO AT LEAST LOOK IT UP IN THE BIBLE AND SEE HOW TO PRONOUNCE IT RIGHT so that people would recognise it as a Bible name when they heard it! What if you heard some strange weirdo called "Ah-dame" instead of Adam?—Instead of Eve you heard her called "Ee-vee" or something like that! It would sound kind of peculiar wouldn't it?

105. SO FOR GOD'S SAKE, LET'S TRY TO PICK A FEW DECENT NAMES OF A FEW DECENT CHARACTERS IN THE BIBLE AND LEARN HOW TO PRONOUNCE THEM instead of just closing your eyes and running your finger down the page and grabbing the first one it stops on!

106. YOU COULD BE AS BAD AS THE MAN WHO WAS ALWAYS CUTTING SCRIPTURES TO FIND OUT WHAT TO DO, and so he opened the Bible and it said‚ "Judas went and hanged himself." So he said, Oh no!—That won't do! So he opened it again and put his finger down and it said, "Go thou and do likewise!" I think that's the way some of you guys must have picked your names from the way they sound!

1107. SO FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T CURSE YOUR POOR LITTLE INNOCENT BABY WITH A NAME LIKE THAT to have to carry around for the rest of his life, or he'll certainly want to change it as soon as he finds out how bad it is!—Especially if you pick for him as bad a name as you picked for yourself or for your wife!

108. I THINK THAT WAS A PRETTY GOOD NAME ADAM PICKED FOR HIS WOMAN! I like that name—wooman—wooman!—Sounds good doesn't it!—Wooman!—The minute I say that word I can see one, can't you? What do you see when I say‚ "Woo—man"? Do you get a visual image? Do you see an old battle-axe? Do you see a little girl?—Or don't you see a nice beautiful full-blown double-breasted woman? Hmm? Hallelujah!—And very affectionate too!

109. NO UNDUE DISRESPECT TO THE MOUNTAINLESS MAIDS, BY THE WAY: They're just as sweet and beautiful as the ones with bigger mountains! It doesn't matter how small your mountains are they're just as adorable, tempting and pettable as big ones, and sometimes more so!—They're more girlish! Some people got the idea from the "Mountin' Maid" picture that I was only fond of big ones.

110. IT DOESN'T MATTER TO ME HOW SMALL YOUR MOUNTAINS ARE, THEY'RE STILL CUTE SWEET LITTLE PEAKS THAT GIVE US AND YOU JUST AS MUCH PLEASURE AS THE BIG ONES! In fact the big ones can kind of get in your way sometimes if you don't look out! But small ones can be sometimes even more fun!—So Hallelujah!—I ought to know! I've had plenty of experience, praise God! (Now let'em use that one on me!)—Anyway maybe now I'll get a few more nudie-cutie photos from you mountainless maids who were afraid to send 'em before! I love you!

111. SO PRAISE GOD, YOU CERTAINLY NEED TO STUDY THE NAMES AND THE SIGNIFICANCES OF THE NAMES, the meanings of the names, the pronunciations of the names and what kind of characters in the Bible had those names! There were some beautiful names with beautiful pronunciations that even had beautiful meanings that were given to some pretty vile characters in the Bible!—Apparently their parents had better hopes for them than they finally turned out to be, but I wouldn't particularly want to be named after one of them!

112. SO WHY DON'T YOU GO THROUGH YOUR BIBLE LIST OF PROPER NAMES AT THE BACK OF YOUR BIBLE AND LOOK UP SOME OF THESE CHARACTERS. If you can't think of one right off that you're already fond of, look them up and see what kind of a person they were. Or really pray and ask God to give you a good name.

113. YOU OR YOUR BABY DON'T NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE NAMED AFTER SOMEBODY IN THE BIBLE. THERE ARE A LOT OF FAMOUS MEN AND GREAT CHARACTERS AND WONDERFUL WOMEN THROUGHOUT HISTORY that you may admire, great Christians and great Christian leaders‚ great heroes and heroines of history. You're perfectly welcome to name yourself and/or your child after any of these whom you admire and whose names you like and which is pleasing to your mate—and we hope it'll be pleasing to your child!