KEYWORDS: sex, god, lord, little, book, love

Fair Sex

David Berg

—MO February, 1975 NO. 326B—DFO

P.O. Box 31, London WC2E 7LX, England or GPO Box 3141, San Juan, Puerto Rico 00936

1. WE LOVED HULDAH'S LITTLE RESUME OF BOOK FAIR REACTIONS ON OUR NEW "FREE SEX" BOOK! It must have been a humdinger to make such a hit! Of course, it's not perfect, which nothing here ever will be, including you or me or any of our stuff! Only the Lord is perfect‚ and it's a constant amazement to me that He can use us at all! God bless Him!

2. OF COURSE IT'S GONNA SHOCK A FEW and offend some as well, but it's certainly not run-of-the-mill! But nothing run-of-the-mill ever makes the headlines either‚ like we do, good or bad! PG! Sounds like it made a hit with a few publishers, and from your reports, you've already assigned some rights for commercial publishing.

3. AT LAST!—WE'RE FINALLY BREAKING INTO THE WOULD MARKET TO REACH THE BILLIONS!—I just hope these agreements do not restrict our own kids' rights to print and distribute personally in the same areas covered by the publishers' assignments! Please check on this to make sure. We're a little forgetful sometimes about some details, and we sure wouldn't want to slip up on that one, anymore than to lose the rights to publish and use our own music in the commercial publishers' areas‚ as well as to sell and distribute it, would we? So let's be very watchful about this, amen?

4. I'D LIKE TO SEE OUR STUFF IN EVERY BOOKSHOP and bookshelf and bookstand and magazine rack and paperback rack and every newsstand in the world, but I still don't think that's going to do as much to push it and sell it and go as far in getting out the message as you kids can personally, in your own worldwide areas with the message!

5. SO PLEASE, DON'T LOSE OUR OWN RIGHTS OF PUBLISHING sales and distribution just for the pleasure of seeing our stuff on the bookstands of the world, unless we can also continue to use them. As far as I'm concerned, commercial publishing is merely another means of getting out the message through additional channels, but we don't wanna lose what we've already got just to get it, or more!—Amen? So please watch this.

6. WE JUST LOVE THE NEW "FREE SEX" completed cover! I'm a great "sex-fiend" as you must know by this time‚ and God must have prepared me all of these years for this modernised ministry of extolling the virtues of sex‚ one of His most wonderful creations, and giving Him the full credit for it that is so long overdue!—Praise God!

7. SO ALL MY YOUTHFUL YEARS OF READING GIRLIE MAGAZINES HAS PAID OFF from the first "Whiz-Bang" magazine ever published when I was a kid, which was a sensation in those days but would be considered mild today‚ to my latest perusals of "Playboy" and others and prowling around in the latest sex shops to see what I could see, and I really honestly think I've never seen any sex book better and more vividly illustrated and strangely written than ours!

8. OF COURSE IT IS "A LITTLE RELIGIOUS" and some people are still gonna wonder why we have to mix God in along with our good sex stuff, as some of them still can't seem to get the point that God was the Originator of the first nudes in a very exotic, erotic Garden of Eden on their first sex spree!—Hallelujah!

9. IT'S ALSO GOING TO LOOK A LITTLE STRANGE TO SOME that we, a religious organisation, should have to first break into the world book market with a sex book as our very first world-wide best seller! But let's face it, that's where the world's at today!

10. BACK TO THE NUDITY, BEAUTY AND SEXUAL FREEDOM OF THE GARDEN with even what must have been some of its humour as well! So why not? I have to laugh when I think how God got there firstest with the mostest with the world's original and sexiest Edenic "Playboy and Playgirl" Club!—Back to the Bible!

11. GOD BLESS YOU MOST FAITHFUL ONES WHO CAN TAKE ME AT MY RAWEST after many years of faithful service and many hard trials and great tribulations and sacrificial hardship having proven your loyalty and faithfulness by years of diligent obedience, self-sacrifice and fealty.

12. ISN'T THAT AMAZING!—I don't believe I've ever used that word before in my whole life, but it suddenly popped in my head when thinking of you just now‚ and we even had to look it up in the dictionary to see what it really meant, so the Lord must have given it Himself or one of my helpers! Hallelujah! In fact when I first opened the dictionary to find it, the very first words that my eyes fell upon, believe it or not, were:

13. "FEUDAL SYSTEM": System in the Middle Ages by which lesser lords, called vassals, held in trust large landed estates from more important lords‚ being bound in return to fight for these lords in time of war"! So when I finally found the word "fealty" a few pages over, I could immediately understand what it meant when it said, "The loyalty of vassal (lesser lord) to his lord"! How about that!

14. I JUST LOVE THOSE JUICY LITTLE TIDBITS THE LORD GIVES some times so miraculously to confirm His Word! Hallelujah! So it must be really true of you and our faith in you is really of the Lord! There was often a great bond of love and loyalty between these lords and their underlords and they often gave their lives for them in battle, as you have!

15. FORGIVE US FOR THIS LITTLE INTERRUPTION right in the middle of a sentence, but the Lord must have thrown that one in as a sign and proof and confirmation that our feelings about you are right and you are trustworthy of what we hope to do! Praise God for His precious faithfulness and His wonderful words that give life to our spirits and are food for our souls!

16. IT'S THESE LITTLE THINGS HE DOES THAT SOMETIMES AMAZE ME, that He's even concerned enough to give us even one word that is so special and can mean so much! Thank you, Jesus! Isn't He wonderful! Praise God! What I was about to say was that because of all of this and our being tested, tried and proven with some truly fiery trials, we come through as even more pure "much fine gold".

17. HE OFTEN TURNS RIGHT AROUND AND REWARDS US BY ALMOST SPOILING US with such good things, that He gives us the desires of our hearts for having delighted ourselves in Him! He not only gives us the things we need, but also many of the things which we simply want or would like to have, like a pleased father giving his favourite and most obedient child a new and pleasant toy because he makes the heart of his father glad.

18. BUT GOD'S A PRETTY SMART FATHER, too, and He knows the more He loves us and the happier we are, the more we'll love Him and the more obedient we'll be out of the pure love, and so do an even better job for Him and accomplish even more in serving others that He loves who need us so!—Amen?

19. BY DRAWING US EVEN CLOSER TO HIM, like the Bridegroom his bride, and making even more love with more caresses, she becomes even more productive and bears him even more children! There's even a method in his madness, His oftentimes seeming wild‚ crazy spurts of the spirit!—They produce even more, better and faster results! PG!

20. THOSE LITTLE FLASHES OF INSPIRATION REALLY ENCOURAGE MY OWN FAITH, even when I'm right in the middle of something seemingly very prosaic‚ practical and businesslike! It's like breaking up the blobs. Even though it may cause a few temporary hardships to some, it will eventually result in far better, more secure and efficient results in the end.

21. AT THE SAME TIME IT COULD MAKE US ALL EVEN HAPPIER with the satisfaction of even greater achievement and fulfillment in the long run, like the end result and greatest goal of sex and soul-wooing: A newborn babe in the family of god, a whole new created soul made by the hands of God for all Eternity to enjoy—the only thing we can take with us from this world!—And to think that God even deigns to use us to do it! I can never get over the wonder of it, both physically and spiritually!

22. IT'S LIKE WHEN HE FIRST GAVE ME MARIA: I DIDN'T REALLY KNOW WHY He was giving her to me or what for, and neither did she, but we were certainly enjoying each other and having a wonderful time—and still are! But finally our union began to bear the fruit that He Himself alone knew He was aiming for all the time, and He really hit the spot!

23. WITH HIS SPIRITUAL SEEDS SHE GAVE BIRTH TO A WHOLE NEW GENERATION—THE REVOLUTION FOR JESUS! Hallelujah! ("Thank God for the inspiration of your father!")—That little juicy bit of confirming "double entendre" was apparently a little added word from Abrahim himself! He really does have an inspired sense of humour sometimes, like the Lord's own! Praise the Lord!—Aren't the Lord and His helpers wonderful!

24. SO AS YOU CAN SEE I CAN'T EVEN WRITE A BUSINESS LETTER WITHOUT FLIPPING OUT THE SPIRIT and giving you a whole new sermon before I can show you the sample. Maybe I'd do better to show you the sample first and follow it with the sales talk, but it always seems I'm doing so many things backwards or "contrary to natural expectation", and yet they seem somehow to work for some crazy reason!

25. AND THIS IS WHAT OUR SEX BOOK HAS BEEN WORKING UP TO all the time—or what the Lord has been getting us worked up to, although I didn't really realise how far it was going to go when He started getting me worked up about it—again like lovemaking! Hallelujah!

26. I NEVER CAN SEEM TO GET AWAY FROM THOSE SEXUAL COMPARISONS! I must really be sex-crazy‚ huh? Well, it really is the most wonderful physical experience and function of the body, isn't it?—And so it's always such a good illustration of even the more wonderful spiritual counterparts!

27. SEX IS LIKE OUR ARTISTS' LIVELY ILLUSTRATIONS which enliven and brighten up our books of the even deeper spiritual truths of the words which can give an even greater spiritual orgasm than the physical enjoyment of the pictures of the same! Do you get what I mean? Well, there I go again always getting some new brainstorm blowing your minds out of no-where into somewhere! It's just gotta be God! 'Cause I couldn't possibly dream up so many crazy ideas all by myself!

28. ONLY GOD COULD POSSIBLY HAVE THOUGHT UP SOMETHING AS WILD AND CRAZY AS SEX and having babies to reproduce the whole human race every generation, new bottles from old bottles!—Instead of man's foolish ideas of being able to produce so many old bottles out of new ones!

29. WELL, WE'RE ABOUT TO EXPLODE ONE OLD ONE, AND YOU'VE NO IDEA HOW FAR some of the new pieces are gonna fly! We're gonna have about the hottest‚ funniest, frankest‚ strangest and most vividly illustrated sex book going that'll make you want to go, go, go! So you'd better come, come, come and get yours ordered now to avoid the rush! Don't wait to see 'em chow line this juicy bit of sex! Get your organ in—I mean order—in today! All's "Fair Sex" in love! And "Free Sex" will tell you how!